Goodbye (Don't Respond if Not Thoughtful)

[Mr. Not]

Just leaving a little note right here... The arrogance of people and their "you'll never understand" and their double standards... It makes me sick... I see it everywhere and this is just one less place where I should have to deal with it at all.

 

Mildly autistic to high functioning autistic (here you go, here's the spoiler I'm leaving you all with. Eat up! I promise you, whatever you respond with to this, I have already heard it... I've dealt with it all... Some of it's sickening, some understandable, some humane, but in any case I have dealt with it all so I prefer you not respond about it at all...) ones like I and less social, more strange, whatever the case, know much more than you'd think. And with this issue of "what to do about it", we're the ones suffering the most. I have no doubt. For a change, try on the shoes of a person who completely understands what's going on, but is dismissed. For us here in the middle of it all, we have to deal with a lot of condescension and dehumanization. Good enough is good enough, and it's been made clear to me that ever since my Junior year of high school, I'm good enough... In others I work with, I see definitive improvement in many. You can moan about a 14 year old shitting themselves, or you can approach it with optimism while doing what you can to help them gradually get better... You can be a selfish f**kface of a person and piss about how your son wasn't quite the way you wanted them to be, or you can not be a douche and approach him as a son.. Stop taking a broad disorder and instead of dismissing the lot as "f*cked", look at each individual. Stop murdering individuality, stop classifying different as diseased. In fact, I hardly see HFA as a barrier of any kind... So many I've known have questioned their own diagnosis and others' diagnoses. There's no doubt that like with ADHD, HFA is over diagnosed. With this in mind, why even bother with giving someone a label of "autistic" to begin with if it's so nominal? This is why I ignore and try and keep away from assessing myself in this way, or having anyone else do so... Sometimes I can't get around it, but yes.. Either way, because of real struggles and/or a complete farces that arrogant people placed on me, I have much more empathy than your average retard hating asshole.

 

What I'm saying here more than anything, is treat people on an equal level... Stop with the presumptions. That's all.

 

 

 

I'm 20 years old now... I'm doing other things with my life.. I have a different direction... One I can share with myself just fine. I'll miss some of you. But I have also transformed my room into a study and rid of all the musical instruments I can only dream of playing to my satisfaction. There's that. I'll miss TOST, I'll miss SOCN... I won't miss some other details though...

 

If I'm misunderstanding anything here, it's others' intents... I don't think I am however, I've seen otherwise. People go back on their word as well. I'm not too worried about it, maybe one day people will realize their wrongdoings and arrogance, maybe they won't... Maybe I'm making a mistake here, maybe not... I don't need people who are consciously unproductive though.

[snowdogged]

I hope you find what you are looking for!

[rushgoober]

From someone who knows nothing about what you've been going through (haven't seen any posts relating to ANY of this if you've been posting them or I've missed related threads completely since I'm a bit myopic on TRF), all I can say is you've got to do what you've got to do. I always thought you were a cool guy and I'll be sad to see you go. FWIW, when people leave in dramatic fashion by announcing it, there's always a backlash. I hope that there aren't negative posts, but if there are, just know that's par for the course.

 

Anyway, I wish you well and should you reconsider and decide to stick around and/or come back, you'll be welcomed by me! :cheers:

[Lost In Xanadu]

Good luck, see you soon. (don't you make a post like this every few months)

[HomesickAlien]

I'll also be sorry to see you go, and I hope this isn't a rash decision in response to a comment someone made elsewhere. Our interaction has been limited, but enjoyable, and I wish you all the best.

 

:cheers:

[JohnnyBlaze]

To the op: Though TRF is based in fantasy land, it's only natural that elements of the real world are found here. These include nastiness, cruelty, crudity, ignorance, wisdom, wit, compassion, and coolness. Hopefully you haven't taken what someone said (whatever spiteful thing it was) too close to heart. We should definitely think about how others feel, "walk in their shoes" as I think you said. But that includes walking in the shoes of those that were mean to us. People say stupid things for all kinds of reasons and those terrible things said don't always come from an evil place. As for those folks that are absolutely, repetitive dicks...well, they're pretty easy to ignore online.

 

Anyway, take care.

[Mr. Not]

Don't want to leave with too sour a taste... With that on my conscious I could never truly move on... I'd say I was 80% NWK in that OP... I want to be 0%... Can't take that post back however, and it does have some points that I care dearly about that need to be known by... Everyone involved with autism.

 

This shouldn't be viewed as a personal note to someone, though a person obviously triggered that... It's more so, and this should be even more obvious hopefully, that this is a culmination of things, and this was my first time being vocal about it. In fact, it shouldn't be considered a personal attack at all even though it is written with a direction... The person should just take it with some consideration.. I know they are dealing with a lot and I need to be sympathetic about that, it's just hard to notice if there's ever any in return, and again, I've seen this in my personal life too... I'm tearing right now by the way... Ha.

 

Also worthwhile to note that I'm leaving TRF not in hate, because I love most of this place... And I've enjoyed most of my time here.. But I'm leaving behind many things that don't have much left to offer to me personally at this point, or at least, nothing to offer in regards to my major goal. This isn't easy stuff, TRF will probably be rather easy since the last few decisions have been quitting fast food entirely, quit swearing, changed my room from a studio to study, and by far the most challenging: I also had a very serious talk with my girlfriend of two years which was hard for both of us, but I felt and saw that things were dwindling and it's still yet to be decided whether we'll have a friendly civil separation, or work on things... TRF was most important in my life in being an outlet for personal issues which I sometimes brought in... Consider that OP (and this post) the grand finale, because that is a big issue which I've kept private for my entire time here, and surprisingly in recent months it's gotten back to me and hard... That's just one of quite a few problems around it though.

 

So bye. Some will miss me, I will miss some, some might be glad of me gone, and I might be a little glad not to have to deal with them either. In any case, no hard feelings... The reasons why I'm changing my life are bigger than my very emotionally angry OP would make it seem...

 

 

DEFINITELY need to give a shout out to the fellow TOSTers... You know who you are :) :hi:

 

 

 

 

"It is what it is... And whatever."

Edited April 25, 2013 by Mr. IsNot

[Babycat]

I have absolutely no idea what's brought this on, Mr. IsNot, but I for one wouldn't want to see you leave.

[RUSHHEAD666]

Don't want to leave with too sour a taste... With that on my conscious I could never truly move on... I'd say I was 80% NWK in that OP... I want to be 0%... Can't take that post back however, and it does have some points that I care dearly about that need to be known by... Everyone involved with autism.

 

This shouldn't be viewed as a personal note to someone, though a person obviously triggered that... It's more so, and this should be even more obvious hopefully, that this is a culmination of things, and this was my first time being vocal about it. In fact, it shouldn't be considered a personal attack at all even though it is written with a direction... The person should just take it with some consideration.. I know they are dealing with a lot and I need to be sympathetic about that, it's just hard to notice if there's ever any in return, and again, I've seen this in my personal life too... I'm tearing right now by the way... Ha.

 

Also worthwhile to note that I'm leaving TRF not in hate, because I love most of this place... And I've enjoyed most of my time here.. But I'm leaving behind many things that don't have much left to offer to me personally at this point, or at least, nothing to offer in regards to my major goal. This isn't easy stuff, TRF will probably be rather easy since the last few decisions have been quitting fast food entirely, quit swearing, changed my room from a studio to study, and by far the most challenging: I also had a very serious talk with my girlfriend of two years which was hard for both of us, but I felt and saw that things were dwindling and it's still yet to be decided whether we'll have a friendly civil separation, or work on things... TRF was most important in my life in being an outlet for personal issues which I sometimes brought in... Consider that OP (and this post) the grand finale, because that is a big issue which I've kept private for my entire time here, and surprisingly in recent months it's gotten back to me and hard... That's just one of quite a few problems around it though.

 

So bye. Some will miss me, I will miss some, some might be glad of me gone, and I might be a little glad not to have to deal with them either. In any case, no hard feelings... The reasons why I'm changing my life are bigger than my very emotionally angry OP would make it seem...

 

 

DEFINITELY need to give a shout out to the fellow TOSTers... You know who you are :) :hi:

 

 

 

 

"It is what it is... And whatever."

 

Wow dude! I always thought you were a nice addition here to talk about music.

 

"To be cool or cast out" says it all!

 

Good luck on your journey of life.

 

Earl

[Tony R]

Alone: E A Poe

 

From childhood's hour I have not been

As others were—I have not seen

As others saw—I could not bring

My passions from a common spring--

From the same source I have not taken

My sorrow—I could not awaken

My heart to joy at the same tone--

And all I lov'd —I lov'd alone--

Then—in my childhood—in the dawn

Of a most stormy life—was drawn

From ev'ry depth of good and ill

The mystery which binds me still--

From the torrent, or the fountain--

From the red cliff of the mountain--

From the sun that round me roll'd

In its autumn tint of gold--

From the lightning in the sky

As it pass'd me flying by--

From the thunder, and the storm--

And the cloud that took the form

(When the rest of Heaven was blue)

Of a demon in my view.

 

----------

 

Not alone in being alone

[Blue J]

We all have to be rather guarded about the personal information we share in an online forum- it opens us up to scrutiny or ridicule in ways that we don't even conceive of at the moment we're posting (I'm speaking in first-person here because I've disclosed things about my own life here, too, and I don't even post that much!)...we have to be sure of what our motives are, and how well equipped we are to be able to take it if we run into what we perceive as insensitivity, or whatever the case may be.

 

I don't know you at all, but I think it's a shame for anyone to post a thread that essentially says that negativity has won out, and caused someone to not want to be a part of the community at all anymore. Years ago, in a different community, I was having a big problem with censorship on the part of the moderators of a forum, and I posted a big, long farewell to everybody I knew there (and there were a bunch- I'd been around it for two years, and my post count was in the five-figure range)...a whole bunch of people on that board were all upset about it, and thought I was blowing things totally out of proportion...and anyway, my big "goodbye forever" lasted about three weeks. I went back to it because I missed the people who I really liked. And that board was taken offline soon after that, actually.

 

Everything is temporary. Enjoy what you can, while you can. Take care and be well.

 

Oh, and know that for as long as you look at the replies in this thread, and continue replying to some of them...that means you're still here. ;)

[OGr8imL84AD8inF8sBlackSedan]

Quit swearing???!!!

 

Are you f***ing crazy????!!!

[Maverick]

You can't go! All the plants are gonna die!

[Lerxster]

I'm assuming this has something to do with the Autism thread, and GG.

 

With that assumption, you said a lot of shitty things, have a lot to learn and haven't walked nearly enough in others shoes.

 

Good luck with.. everything.

[Principled Man]

Good luck, see you soon. (don't you make a post like this every few months)

 

 

Months? It took him only 3.5 hours to come back and post again.

 

Melodramatic false resignations are always a hoot...... :laughing guy:

[Khan]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v423/KublaKhan/arizona_bob_waving_md_wht.gif

[1-0-0-1-0-0-1]

I'm assuming this has something to do with the Autism thread, and GG.

 

With that assumption, you said a lot of shitty things, have a lot to learn and haven't walked nearly enough in others shoes.

 

Good luck with.. everything.

 

:goodone:

 

(thought I'd break out that forgotten smiley...)

[Lost In Xanadu]

I'm assuming this has something to do with the Autism thread, and GG.

 

With that assumption, you said a lot of shitty things, have a lot to learn and haven't walked nearly enough in others shoes.

 

Good luck with.. everything.

 

:goodone:

 

(thought I'd break out that forgotten smiley...)

 

The like function has killed that smiley!

[ILSnwdog]

I'm assuming this has something to do with the Autism thread, and GG.

 

With that assumption, you said a lot of shitty things, have a lot to learn and haven't walked nearly enough in others shoes.

 

Good luck with.. everything.

 

:goodone:

 

(thought I'd break out that forgotten smiley...)

 

The like function has killed that smiley!

I use that smiley when the like function isn't enough to show the brilliance of a post.

[bathory]

:laughing guy:

[bathory]

why do people feel the need to announce they're leaving the site? you seemed like a nice dude but come on, no need for this keith emerson solo of a farewell...

[Lost In Xanadu]

I'm assuming this has something to do with the Autism thread, and GG.

 

With that assumption, you said a lot of shitty things, have a lot to learn and haven't walked nearly enough in others shoes.

 

Good luck with.. everything.

 

:goodone:

 

(thought I'd break out that forgotten smiley...)

 

The like function has killed that smiley!

I use that smiley when the like function isn't enough to show the brilliance of a post.

 

You never use that one with me anymore

 

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_eB4BQiGE_r4/S2wNEp2zpRI/AAAAAAAAALQ/rHpBcciahp4/s320/Sad+smiley+crying.gif

Edited April 25, 2013 by Lost In Xanadu

[GhostGirl]

I'm assuming this has something to do with the Autism thread, and GG.

 

With that assumption, you said a lot of shitty things, have a lot to learn and haven't walked nearly enough in others shoes.

 

Good luck with.. everything.

 

:goodone:

 

(thought I'd break out that forgotten smiley...)

 

The like function has killed that smiley!

I use that smiley when the like function isn't enough to show the brilliance of a post.

 

You never use that one with me anymore

 

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_eB4BQiGE_r4/S2wNEp2zpRI/AAAAAAAAALQ/rHpBcciahp4/s320/Sad+smiley+crying.gif

:goodone: There you go, hon. Just for you!

[Lost In Xanadu]

I'm assuming this has something to do with the Autism thread, and GG.

 

With that assumption, you said a lot of shitty things, have a lot to learn and haven't walked nearly enough in others shoes.

 

Good luck with.. everything.

 

:goodone:

 

(thought I'd break out that forgotten smiley...)

 

The like function has killed that smiley!

I use that smiley when the like function isn't enough to show the brilliance of a post.

 

You never use that one with me anymore

 

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_eB4BQiGE_r4/S2wNEp2zpRI/AAAAAAAAALQ/rHpBcciahp4/s320/Sad+smiley+crying.gif

:goodone: There you go, hon. Just for you!

 

Thanks, but a pity "goodone" stings a little.

[GhostGirl]

I'm assuming this has something to do with the Autism thread, and GG.

 

With that assumption, you said a lot of shitty things, have a lot to learn and haven't walked nearly enough in others shoes.

 

Good luck with.. everything.

 

:goodone:

 

(thought I'd break out that forgotten smiley...)

 

The like function has killed that smiley!

I use that smiley when the like function isn't enough to show the brilliance of a post.

 

You never use that one with me anymore

 

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_eB4BQiGE_r4/S2wNEp2zpRI/AAAAAAAAALQ/rHpBcciahp4/s320/Sad+smiley+crying.gif

:goodone: There you go, hon. Just for you!

 

Thanks, but a pity "goodone" stings a little.

it wasn't a pity one. I genuinely like the fact that you expressed your honest feelings.