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Posted (edited)

Jokes That Gynecologists Should Not Tell Their Patients, Chapter 37:

 

 

Did you know that there are two things in the air that can get a woman pregnant?

 

-- Her feet!

:lol: Where are the preceding 36 chapters? Edited by pjbear05
Posted

Jokes That Gynecologists Should Not Tell Their Patients, Chapter 37:

 

 

Did you know that there are two things in the air that can get a woman pregnant?

 

-- Her feet!

 

:lol: Where are the preceding 36 chapters?

 

They would take up too much bandwidth. Chapter 1 starts off with "Two gynecologists walk into a bar...." ;) ;)

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Posted

What's E.T. short for?

 

 

 

 

 

 

He had Tiny legs.

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Posted

- Doctor, the problem hasn't gone away.

 

- The suppositories I prescribed - have you been taking them regularly?

 

- What do you think I've been doing? Shoving them up my ass?

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Posted

What do you call Batman when he skips Church?

 

 

 

-- Christian Bale

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Posted
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.....
Posted

Why was Princess Leia always so stern and cranky?

 

 

 

She was looking for love in Alderaan places....

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Posted

What do you call a camel with no humps?

 

 

 

 

Humphrey :)

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Posted

Do you know why scuba divers fall backwards out of the boat?

 

 

Because if they fall forward, they will still be in the boat.

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Posted
I fell for a moonshiner's daughter. She broke my heart, but I loved her still.
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Posted

What does Eeyore always order at Starbucks?

 

 

 

A large Depresso.

Posted

*SIGH* ..... Comedy is really tough during a quarantine.

 

 

 

 

You always have to tell inside jokes.

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Posted

Did you hear about the guy addicted to brake fluid?

 

 

 

No big deal tho, he can stop anytime he wants

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Posted

Here's a music one..........

 

 

My farmer friend used his stimulus money to but baby chickens.

In other words, he got his money for nothing and his chicks for free.

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Posted

I explained to my 4-year old that it’s perfectly normal to accidentally poop your pants.

 

 

 

The stupid brat is still laughing at me.

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Posted

A young monk arrives at the monastery. He is assigned to helping the other monks in copying the old laws of the church by hand.

He notices, however, that all of the monks are copying from copies, not from the original manuscript. So, the new monk goes to the head monk to question this, pointing out that if someone made even a small error in the first copy, it would never be picked up! In fact, that error would be continued in all of the subsequent copies.

The head monk, says, “You make a good point, my son.”

He goes down into the dark caves underneath the monastery where the original manuscripts are held in a locked vault. Hours go by and nobody sees the head monk. The young monk gets worried and goes down to look for him.

He sees him banging his head against the wall and wailing.

“We missed the R! We missed the R! We missed the R!”

“Father!” cries the young monk. “What’s wrong?”

The head monk with tears in his eyes replies, “The word is celebrate!”

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Posted

What do you name a grumpy cow?

 

 

moo-dy!

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Posted
To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office: I will make you regret it. You have my Word.
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Posted

I'm turning 60 this year, and I have never used essential oils.

 

It makes me wonder just how essential they really are. They should be called optional oils.

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Posted
Tenth inning starts with a runner on second.
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