Autism

[Mr. Not]

I volunteer in a social group that is specifically for autistic people at our school, and it's really interesting how personalities and expressions vary from person to person... I'm actually pretty close friends with one autistic guy (Chris) who had lots of problems socially, but now he has improved vastly.. But he still has one huge problem which is over analyzing social situations constantly. We all overreact, but he's always so paranoid and thinks he's doing one thing or another wrong since people have judged him so much. He always is in fear that once someone finds out he's autistic, they won't want to be friends with him.

 

I'm not sure if he talked about this in our school news article for autism, because it's a very personal issue of his (but I think it's fine to share it here since no one on this forum lives in Sonoma County, and it's the right place to share this information.), But I will take a picture of the article and post it here later.

Edited May 16, 2010 by KennethRush

[treeduck]

[GhostGirl]

Exciting news.

 

This could possibly go in the autism thread.

[RushRevisited]

QUOTE (treeduck @ May 25 2010, 04:36 PM)

After two weeks of treatment, nerve cell communication was normal and adaptation of nerve cells to stimulation, a key part of learning and memory, was restored.

Two weeks only!! Wow, I hope this is the solution that has been sought on this. My son has a child with severe autism in his class (he has a "helper" to be with him throughout the day) - sweetest kid you've ever met and I would love to see a solution for him as well as my nephew, GG's son, and all others out there dealing with autism.

[GhostGirl]

QUOTE (RushRevisited @ May 25 2010, 03:43 PM)

QUOTE (treeduck @ May 25 2010, 04:36 PM) After two weeks of treatment, nerve cell communication was normal and adaptation of nerve cells to stimulation, a key part of learning and memory, was restored. Two weeks only!! Wow, I hope this is the solution that has been sought on this. My son has a child with severe autism in his class (he has a "helper" to be with him throughout the day) - sweetest kid you've ever met and I would love to see a solution for him as well as my nephew, GG's son, and all others out there dealing with autism.

[nobodys hero]

Thanks Ducky, I'm going to pass this on to my neighbor whose son has autism.

[Del_Duio]

QUOTE (GhostGirl @ May 25 2010, 03:38 PM)

Exciting news. This could possibly go in the autism thread.

Same, both my kids have autism to different degrees. This is exciting stuff!

[GhostGirl]

Please forgive a gigantic rant...

 

I hate summer. I absolutely f***ing hate it.

 

Even though Stephen is in a summer program (that's costing me money I don't have) he is still very out of kilter.

 

The kid loves McDonalds, as I've mentioned. He wants McD's every single day. He eats the small cheeseburger and fries (so it's not like we're stuffing him with Big Macs) but I still worry so much about feeding him this crap.

 

And people say, "Well, just don't take him there."

 

 

Right.

 

During the school year we limit his "outside food" to weekends or, maybe once every two months, we go out during the week. But summer has blown it all to hell. I could deal with his crying if *I* was the one at home with him, but his dad keeps him during the day, and he won't try to outlast the episodes.

 

I feel powerless. Stephen's diet is terrible without this added horrible food. I feel like the worst mother in the world. I don't know what to do.

 

I'm on vacation next week - and I know when I pick Stephen up at camp, he'll immediately want McD's...so do I take him and get through the day, or take him home screaming and drive everybody nuts? The kid will cry for hours, no lie. Day after day. It doesn't work like it does with regular kids.

 

I am so afraid he's going to get diabetes or something. It absolutely keeps me up at night.

 

Thanks for "listening."

[Mara]

^^^ What a dilemma. Would he ever "get used to" not having McD's as a diet staple?

I can certainly understand not wanting to put him, and everyone else, through the hell of trying to eliminate that as part of a daily routine.

 

But diabetes. . .yeah. That's a real worry, and it'd force some serious dietary modification. I can't even imagine if you had to give him insulin shots and test his blood several times/day. I don't mean to be trying to scare you, but I know I'm not bringing up any scenarios that aren't already occupying some dark corner of your mind.

[iluvgeddy05]

QUOTE (GhostGirl @ Jun 18 2010, 07:42 PM)

Please forgive a gigantic rant... I hate summer. I absolutely f***ing hate it. Even though Stephen is in a summer program (that's costing me money I don't have) he is still very out of kilter. The kid loves McDonalds, as I've mentioned. He wants McD's every single day. He eats the small cheeseburger and fries (so it's not like we're stuffing him with Big Macs) but I still worry so much about feeding him this crap. And people say, "Well, just don't take him there." Right. During the school year we limit his "outside food" to weekends or, maybe once every two months, we go out during the week. But summer has blown it all to hell. I could deal with his crying if *I* was the one at home with him, but his dad keeps him during the day, and he won't try to outlast the episodes. I feel powerless. Stephen's diet is terrible without this added horrible food. I feel like the worst mother in the world. I don't know what to do. I'm on vacation next week - and I know when I pick Stephen up at camp, he'll immediately want McD's...so do I take him and get through the day, or take him home screaming and drive everybody nuts? The kid will cry for hours, no lie. Day after day. It doesn't work like it does with regular kids. I am so afraid he's going to get diabetes or something. It absolutely keeps me up at night. Thanks for "listening."

Well, how does he eat otherwise? I obviously can't offer you advice but I can say you are doing what you can. Please remember this is happening because of the situation you're in, not because you don't care or want to. There's a difference.

 

 

[GhostGirl]

He eats terribly otherwise. Carbs mostly. He takes a vitamin - that's the healthiest thing he does...and all he drinks is water.

 

Mara, I guess eventually he'd get used to it - IF the person in charge would put up with the crying.

 

I only have so much control here.

[iluvgeddy05]

QUOTE (GhostGirl @ Jun 18 2010, 10:15 PM)

He eats terribly otherwise. Carbs mostly. He takes a vitamin - that's the healthiest thing he does...and all he drinks is water. Mara, I guess eventually he'd get used to it - IF the person in charge would put up with the crying. I only have so much control here.

Only drinking water, IMO, is great -- it will keep him hydrated without extra calories and allows his body mechanics to function. Fruit juice and soda are bad for kids all the time, heck, even for adults too. Milk would be good but as a kid myself, I never EVER drank milk. I do now, but I surely wasn't the poster child of health..

 

 

As for McDonalds, yeah, the fries are bad, but I've always heard a small hamburger w/o all the crap on it is better than a chicken sandwhich!

 

I know it's hard to see things from the positive angle and not be hard on yourself.

[liquidcrystalcompass]

QUOTE (GhostGirl @ Jun 18 2010, 10:15 PM)

He eats terribly otherwise. Carbs mostly. He takes a vitamin - that's the healthiest thing he does...and all he drinks is water. Mara, I guess eventually he'd get used to it - IF the person in charge would put up with the crying. I only have so much control here.

Will drink any juices?

[GhostGirl]

QUOTE (liquidcrystalcompass @ Jun 21 2010, 01:01 PM)

QUOTE (GhostGirl @ Jun 18 2010, 10:15 PM) He eats terribly otherwise.  Carbs mostly.  He takes a vitamin - that's the healthiest thing he does...and all he drinks is water. Mara, I guess eventually he'd get used to it - IF the person in charge would put up with the crying. I only have so much control here. Will drink any juices? Nope. He only drinks water, period.

[Ya_Big_Tree]

I just read something from a friend of mine who has Aspergers Syndrome, which is a form of Autism. In it he was explaining his frustrations of having to go through his entire life seeing and experiencing the world in an essay format. How he always speaks in that format and how it causes strains on relationships and friendships with impatient people who just don't see the world so formally.

 

I feel a lil bad now because I am one of those people. We used to be very close but now I feel that I didn't really know him very much at all and he in turn didn't know me or wasn't able to grasp the concepts to understand the type of person that I am because we are so very different. Our friendship has been strained for years and now I just avoid talking to him because our conversations inevitably lead to frustration on both sides and him not having the ability to let certain things in the past go.

 

It's just really got me thinking because I thought this person was the closest person to me at one point in my life and now it's like I was deceived and we were never close, nor knew each other we were and are strangers.

 

[Rolinda Bonz]

[Fridge]

QUOTE (Ya_Big_Tree @ Jul 9 2010, 06:25 AM)

I just read something from a friend of mine who has Aspergers Syndrome, which is a form of Autism. In it he was explaining his frustrations of having to go through his entire life seeing and experiencing the world in an essay format. How he always speaks in that format and how it causes strains on relationships and friendships with impatient people who just don't see the world so formally. I feel a lil bad now because I am one of those people. We used to be very close but now I feel that I didn't really know him very much at all and he in turn didn't know me or wasn't able to grasp the concepts to understand the type of person that I am because we are so very different. Our friendship has been strained for years and now I just avoid talking to him because our conversations inevitably lead to frustration on both sides and him not having the ability to let certain things in the past go. It's just really got me thinking because I thought this person was the closest person to me at one point in my life and now it's like I was deceived and we were never close, nor knew each other we were and are strangers.

This strikes very close to home for me as I too have Aspergers, though I didn't know about this till I was in my early 30s. My salvation (and curse) was to be very high functioning and as a result I was able to simulate a pretty decent facsimile of "normality"without any help, though I dearly wish I had had it at the time.

 

I can offer you some reassurance that whatever your friend feels for you is indeed genuine. Although we perceive the world and others around us in a slightly different way from you, we are not robots, so please don't mistake formality for lack of feeling.

 

As for grasping concepts, well, we can still do this...it is just that we can arrive at the same conclusion by a slightly different path. Don't forget that most people don't innately know how to behave in social situations when they are born, that is learned behaviour. We can learn too, though it is a much more painful process.

 

I'm guessing your friend is of a similar age to you, ie mid twenties? In that case, stick with him, it will get better....Over the years, my ability to handle it has improved exponentially as my "database" has grown to the point that it is very unlikely you would know I had this if you met me.I only "slip up" veey rarely now, and it is only those close to me that can read the signs occasionally....What I'm trying to say here is that he should improve until his Aspergers is less and less of an issue as time goes on...the "essay" gets larger and larger until there is so much info in it that it is veery similar to the "real thing"

 

I'm not sure if I have made any sense here at all, but I hope it is of some help to you. If you need any more insight from someone who knows only too well what this situation is like, the you only need to ask, in public or via PM

 

[Ya_Big_Tree]

QUOTE (Fridge @ Jul 10 2010, 12:10 AM)

QUOTE (Ya_Big_Tree @ Jul 9 2010, 06:25 AM) I just read something from a friend of mine who has Aspergers Syndrome, which is a form of Autism. In it he was explaining his frustrations of having to go through his entire life seeing and experiencing the world in an essay format. How he always speaks in that format and how it causes strains on relationships and friendships with impatient people who just don't see the world so formally.  I feel a lil bad now because I am one of those people. We used to be very close but now I feel that I didn't really know him very much at all and he in turn didn't know me or wasn't able to grasp the concepts to understand the type of person that I am because we are so very different. Our friendship has been strained for years and now I just avoid talking to him because our conversations inevitably lead to frustration on both sides and him not having the ability to let certain things in the past go. It's just really got me thinking because I thought this person was the closest person to me at one point in my life and now it's like I was deceived and we were never close, nor knew each other we were and are strangers. This strikes very close to home for me as I too have Aspergers, though I didn't know about this till I was in my early 30s. My salvation (and curse) was to be very high functioning and as a result I was able to simulate a pretty decent facsimile of "normality"without any help, though I dearly wish I had had it at the time.   I can offer you some reassurance that whatever your friend feels for you is indeed genuine. Although we perceive the world and others around us in a slightly different way from you, we are not robots, so please don't mistake formality for lack of feeling.   As for grasping concepts, well, we can still do this...it is just that we can arrive at the same conclusion by a slightly different path. Don't forget that most people don't innately know how to behave in social situations when they are born, that is learned behaviour. We can learn too, though it is a much more painful process.   I'm guessing your friend is of a similar age to you, ie mid twenties? In that case, stick with him, it will get better....Over the years, my ability to handle it has improved exponentially as my "database" has grown to the point that it is very unlikely you would know I had this if you met me.I only "slip up" veey rarely now, and it is only those close to me that can read the signs occasionally....What I'm trying to say here is that he should improve until his Aspergers is less and less of an issue as time goes on...the "essay" gets larger and larger until there is so much info in it that it is veery similar to the "real thing"   I'm not sure if I have made any sense here at all, but I hope it is of some help to you. If you need any more insight from someone who knows only too well what this situation is like, the you only need to ask, in public or via PM   Thank you Fridge I appreciate that.

[GhostGirl]

[GhostGirl]

QUOTE (Fridge @ Jul 10 2010, 01:10 AM)

QUOTE (Ya_Big_Tree @ Jul 9 2010, 06:25 AM) I just read something from a friend of mine who has Aspergers Syndrome, which is a form of Autism. In it he was explaining his frustrations of having to go through his entire life seeing and experiencing the world in an essay format. How he always speaks in that format and how it causes strains on relationships and friendships with impatient people who just don't see the world so formally.  I feel a lil bad now because I am one of those people. We used to be very close but now I feel that I didn't really know him very much at all and he in turn didn't know me or wasn't able to grasp the concepts to understand the type of person that I am because we are so very different. Our friendship has been strained for years and now I just avoid talking to him because our conversations inevitably lead to frustration on both sides and him not having the ability to let certain things in the past go. It's just really got me thinking because I thought this person was the closest person to me at one point in my life and now it's like I was deceived and we were never close, nor knew each other we were and are strangers. This strikes very close to home for me as I too have Aspergers, though I didn't know about this till I was in my early 30s. My salvation (and curse) was to be very high functioning and as a result I was able to simulate a pretty decent facsimile of "normality"without any help, though I dearly wish I had had it at the time.   I can offer you some reassurance that whatever your friend feels for you is indeed genuine. Although we perceive the world and others around us in a slightly different way from you, we are not robots, so please don't mistake formality for lack of feeling.   As for grasping concepts, well, we can still do this...it is just that we can arrive at the same conclusion by a slightly different path. Don't forget that most people don't innately know how to behave in social situations when they are born, that is learned behaviour. We can learn too, though it is a much more painful process.   I'm guessing your friend is of a similar age to you, ie mid twenties? In that case, stick with him, it will get better....Over the years, my ability to handle it has improved exponentially as my "database" has grown to the point that it is very unlikely you would know I had this if you met me.I only "slip up" veey rarely now, and it is only those close to me that can read the signs occasionally....What I'm trying to say here is that he should improve until his Aspergers is less and less of an issue as time goes on...the "essay" gets larger and larger until there is so much info in it that it is veery similar to the "real thing"   I'm not sure if I have made any sense here at all, but I hope it is of some help to you. If you need any more insight from someone who knows only too well what this situation is like, the you only need to ask, in public or via PM   Not to sound condescending at all, but I'm proud of you, P. I hope you understand what I mean.

[GhostGirl]

The portable DVD player we got only a few weeks ago for Stephen quit working when I got home from work yesterday. This is BAD. He won't stop fiddling with the little laser thing on the inside so, obviously, the players won't take that abuse for long. And I can't get him to stop - every time he puts in a disc, he pushes the laser thing back to the center.

 

<sigh> I wish they made personal players with the "slot" loading system...

 

Anyway...got him dressed and we went to Wal-Mart. Found the DVD display, and of course he wanted to take the one from the display, which, incidentally was a white Phillips brand, which is what he used to have. The ones in the boxes (when we FINALLY got someone to help us) are black. This is also bad. It doesn't make sense to him if the one he SEES is white, then why is the one in box black? And I can't explain it to him.

 

So, finally we get away from electronics with the player and a Mary Poppins DVD...grab the other stuff we need and check out. On the way out the door, I thought I felt something drop, but I looked around and didn't see anything, so we went home.

 

About an hour later, I went to get something out of my wallet.

 

Guess what that was, that I must've heard fall? And then couldn't see in the dark, trying to make sure Stephen didn't run out in front of a car?

 

I was reminded of how careless I am with leaving my purse unzipped...and of course I do need to be more careful, but it was bad enough to realize that my wallet was probably gone, and I'd have to replace my drivers license, debit card, etc. No cash in there, of course.

 

But...I called Wal-Mart and someone had turned it in. I went and picked it up, and cried all the way home, partially from relief and partially because I just can't seem to get it together anymore.

[Natch]

 

It always seems to be something, huh GG?

 

At least you got lucky that someone with a conscience turned in your stuff at the store....a rarity these days.

 

 

[Rolinda Bonz]

that's SWAY kewl that somebody turned your wallet in to the store, GG. what a relief!

that sounds like one agonizingly long day. i hope you will get some good rest this weekend.

 

don't worry about the cd's...you should find someone else to give them to who might benefit from them.

 

Timothy asked to go see Miss Kim (his HANDLE practicioner) this morning, twice. i was surprised he said that,

and tried to explain why we couldn't do that today. but he asked again a few minutes later.

i wonder if he was reading over my shoulder last night when i posted about Judith.

i guess i'd better make an appt.

 

the little rascal tricked me this morning. he's into watching the very end of all the vhs tapes right now.

some of them beep and some just go snowy...all of them are very annoying to me.

anyway, i was watching a dvd on the big screen and he comes out to get me. "Mom, come here."

so i follow him down the hall, and he points to my bed. he wants me to lay down.

saturday morning will never find me arguing against that. so i lay down, and he stretches out next to me.

we're watching Emperer's New Groove. all is well, but i'm still trying to discover the point of this.

does he just want me to watch the movie with him?

about 2 minutes later, he gets up and goes out to the big screen to start playing with the vhs.

that jive turkey!

 

i should be happy about the vhs hobby. at least he is not fingerprinting all of the dvd's.

how did you teach Stephen not to touch the readable part of the discs?

[GhostGirl]

[Fridge]