invisible airwave Posted February 7 Share Posted February 7 How do you make seven even? You take away the S. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Principled Man Posted February 11 Author Share Posted February 11 Wednesday commences a very sacred season. To honor it, I'm giving up picking my belly button for lint. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Principled Man Posted February 14 Author Share Posted February 14 Cruise ship passenger: This is a great all-you-can-eat dinner layout, and the salad bar is huge! Is there any type of lettuce I should avoid? Server: Well, I'd steer clear of the iceberg. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackhawkrush Posted February 16 Share Posted February 16 Man: "Your cock can't even open Windows". 2nd man: "I don't need to open Windows because unlike your cock, my cock's not Microsoft". 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackhawkrush Posted February 17 Share Posted February 17 What do you call a monkey with a banana in each ear? Anything you like, he can't hear. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackhawkrush Posted February 18 Share Posted February 18 Caveman: This is a drawing of an animal that doesn't know what it is yet. A bi-son. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chicken hawk Posted February 18 Share Posted February 18 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
invisible airwave Posted February 18 Share Posted February 18 I've got some Motown puns. Three, maybe four tops. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Principled Man Posted February 20 Author Share Posted February 20 My walk to the bar takes 5 minutes but my walk home takes 30 minutes. The difference is staggering. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Principled Man Posted February 21 Author Share Posted February 21 I had my wiener dog fixed. A week later, she got out but returned the next morning. All was well. Two months after that, she had two puppies! Amazed, I wrote a story about it: Two Dachshunds in One: A Spayed Oddity Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nova Carmina Posted February 21 Share Posted February 21 15 hours ago, Principled Man said: I had my wiener dog fixed. A week later, she got out but returned the next morning. All was well. Two months after that, she had two puppies! Amazed, I wrote a story about it: Two Dachshunds in One: A Spayed Oddity 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Principled Man Posted February 22 Author Share Posted February 22 Researchers in London are suggesting that taking Viagra is linked with better mental health. It means that men are finally working smarter - not harder. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackhawkrush Posted February 23 Share Posted February 23 My wife had her face lifted last week. Not high enough, I can still see it. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackhawkrush Posted February 23 Share Posted February 23 My voice was trained in Venice Might go there one day and get it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackhawkrush Posted February 23 Share Posted February 23 A lot of people like dry wine, I prefer wet. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackhawkrush Posted February 23 Share Posted February 23 I cleaned the attic with the wife. Full of cobwebs. But she's good to the kids. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackhawkrush Posted February 23 Share Posted February 23 It's late, I have to go. I must bite the postman in the morning. The dog's not well. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackhawkrush Posted February 24 Share Posted February 24 I always sit in the tail end of a plane because you never hear of a plane backing into a mountain. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackhawkrush Posted March 1 Share Posted March 1 I don't call poker gambling. Why call it gambling when it's already called poker. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackhawkrush Posted March 1 Share Posted March 1 My wife swallowed a two-dollar coin. How is she? No change. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Principled Man Posted March 1 Author Share Posted March 1 (edited) My wife asked me what day it is. I told her, "March 1st." She stomped back and forth in a line and then asked me again. Edited March 2 by Principled Man 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackhawkrush Posted March 2 Share Posted March 2 "If it wasn't for the mustache, you'd look like my wife". "I don't have a mustache". "No, but my wife does". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackhawkrush Posted March 2 Share Posted March 2 I was in the ring with Muhammad Ali. I got him worried. He thought he killed me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Principled Man Posted March 2 Author Share Posted March 2 1 hour ago, blackhawkrush said: "If it wasn't for the mustache, you'd look like my wife". "I don't have a mustache". "No, but my wife does". Your wife is Italian, too? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chicken hawk Posted March 2 Share Posted March 2 When does a leprechaun cross the road? When it turns green! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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