BeOhBe Bob Posted July 6, 2013 Share Posted July 6, 2013 Lately instead of JUST flippin the bird, after they come up and hang onto my rear bumper and pass meI match their speed so we're door handle to door handle (sorta) and make a goofy face, or smile like I was an extra in the "Black Hole Sun" Soundgarden video, or I go old school and fire off a finger and a verbal GO.....YOURSELF ASSH*LE! And so.... What's your thing? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnnyBlaze Posted July 6, 2013 Share Posted July 6, 2013 Usually I find where the person lives and put 666 severed lamb heads on their doorstep every 6 days for the following 666 days. On the days in which I don't put the severed lamb heads, I have 6 black cloaked individuals standing on the person's front lawn singing Black Sabbath songs backwards 24 hours a day. They leave only when the 666 severed lamb heads are in place and return when the heads are removed. I'm not sure if the "JohnnyBlaze Technique of Not Giving Someone the Bird" helps those people rethink their driving skills but it sure gives them something to think about. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OGr8imL84AD8inF8sBlackSedan Posted July 6, 2013 Share Posted July 6, 2013 I have a death ray....Takes care of 'em every time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
USB Connector Posted July 6, 2013 Share Posted July 6, 2013 The only thing that ever annoys me is tailgating. You can cut me off during rush hour, change lanes without signaling, anything. As long as you don't hit me I couldn't care less. Tailgate me for a few minutes and I'll drop to half the speed limit or less and speed up to block you from trying to overtake me. Do you have a coffee you're drinking? I hope you have a secure cap because it's time for a well timed brake check. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ancient Ways Posted July 6, 2013 Share Posted July 6, 2013 Around here you mind your business and keep moving. Just had a guy here get shot and killed on the interstate because the other driver thought he was the guy from some place further back down the road. Wrong guy though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Territorial_Game Posted July 6, 2013 Share Posted July 6, 2013 This might sound a bit dickish- but when certain vehicles tailgate me, it makes me madder than others. Huge, souped up pickup trucks that probably have never done a day of work really piss me off because they tend to be driven by the biggest assholes down here. So when they ride my bumper (I stay within 1-2 mph of the speed limit), I brake tap big time. Just something about those ridiculous trucks, especially the diesels that shoot that nasty burned fuel out, that serve no actual function besides penis compensation and deliberately delivering a giant middle finger to the environment that piss me off to no end. And here, they're driven by spoiled college kids at least 75% of the time. Sorry... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeOhBe Bob Posted July 6, 2013 Author Share Posted July 6, 2013 The only thing that ever annoys me is tailgating. You can cut me off during rush hour, change lanes without signaling, anything. As long as you don't hit me I couldn't care less. Tailgate me for a few minutes and I'll drop to half the speed limit or less and speed up to block you from trying to overtake me. Do you have a coffee you're drinking? I hope you have a secure cap because it's time for a well timed brake check. ^^^^^^ this Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Babycat Posted July 6, 2013 Share Posted July 6, 2013 Death Star. That's the way to go! *evil grin* :D Ps, thanks for the tag, Bob! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeOhBe Bob Posted July 7, 2013 Author Share Posted July 7, 2013 Death Star. That's the way to go! *evil grin* :D Ps, thanks for the tag, Bob! Meow! >^.*.^< Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
An Enemy Without Posted July 7, 2013 Share Posted July 7, 2013 I carry around a carton of eggs in case someone ever cuts me off. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hobo73 Posted July 7, 2013 Share Posted July 7, 2013 Tailgate me for a few minutes and I'll drop to half the speed limit or less and speed up to block you from trying to overtake me. Do you have a coffee you're drinking? I hope you have a secure cap because it's time for a well timed brake check. sounds JUST like Jeff. Every part of that lolAnd he'll look in the rearview mirror and say "AWWWWW, bet you HATE going slow, huh. Oh, oh, are you getting upset now?? TOO BAD!!!!!" hahahaand yes, he did it to a cop once. This police car was literally trying to give our car a hug. He slowed down so much, we saw the cop get pissed in the mirror and slow down, too. (and no, he had no sirens going) :P 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Babycat Posted July 7, 2013 Share Posted July 7, 2013 People in cars using the wrong part of some lane: *HONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!* 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeOhBe Bob Posted July 7, 2013 Author Share Posted July 7, 2013 People in cars using the wrong part of some lane: *HONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!* Like slot car racers? Make up your f*ckin MIND!! OR trun signals on for a half mile THEN a complete stop to make the damn turn...which makes me yell TAKE THE DAMN TURN ALEADY!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnnyBlaze Posted July 7, 2013 Share Posted July 7, 2013 Some of you guys got the road rage gene. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hobo73 Posted July 7, 2013 Share Posted July 7, 2013 ohhhhhh, NOBODY on here has the road rage my mom had 0_oshe had guns pulled on her regularly lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mara Posted July 8, 2013 Share Posted July 8, 2013 I follow them to wherever it is they're going and then slam their penis in the car door. (Assuming it's a guy). I did once end up at the same QuikTrip as the idiot who was clearly texting when she nearly ran me off the highway. You bet I cornered her and let her have it. I believe I told her where she needed to put her smartphone when she was behind the wheel. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeOhBe Bob Posted July 8, 2013 Author Share Posted July 8, 2013 like USB, both Diane and I slow waaaaaay the f down to 3 MPH BELOW the limit and if they insist on being tailgating assholes, we make sure our brakes work! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amy Farrah Fowler Posted July 8, 2013 Share Posted July 8, 2013 Tailgate me for a few minutes and I'll drop to half the speed limit or less and speed up to block you from trying to overtake me. Do you have a coffee you're drinking? I hope you have a secure cap because it's time for a well timed brake check. That's what I miss about driving a stick. Downshifting with no brake lights. :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gangsterfurious Posted July 8, 2013 Share Posted July 8, 2013 I carry around a carton of eggs in case someone ever cuts me off. I do not want to know what your car smells like. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gangsterfurious Posted July 8, 2013 Share Posted July 8, 2013 I'm a "The closer you get, the slower I go" person. Also, I do provide free break checks, especially to the men in compensation trucks that try to intimidate me. My husband and I also love to get next to stupid women on their cell phones, the ones swerving and driving slow, and we honk and honk and honk until they hang up and stop being a danger on the road. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cygnus 2112 Posted July 9, 2013 Share Posted July 9, 2013 (edited) I'm like to take my truck out of drive and into 2nd when I have people on my back bumper. Let's see how well you can react to me slowing down without brake lights. Edited July 9, 2013 by billybobjoe1881 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnnyBlaze Posted July 9, 2013 Share Posted July 9, 2013 I'm like to take my truck out of drive and into 2nd when I have people on my back bumper. Let's see how well you can react to me slowing down without brake lights.And if they don't react in time? I can imagine you sitting on your recliner at home with arm in a sling and a neckbrace on and boasting, "That guy riding my ass sure learned his lesson. He won't be doing that again anytime soon.";)Be careful out there. Those shitty drivers aren't worth it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
An Enemy Without Posted July 9, 2013 Share Posted July 9, 2013 I carry around a carton of eggs in case someone ever cuts me off. I do not want to know what your car smells like. All my eggs are sulfur-free. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CygnusGal Posted July 10, 2013 Share Posted July 10, 2013 Nothing. I back off. If someone insists on driving like an a-hole, fine, just not around me. I've had some pretty crazy things happen and no good has ever come of confrontation and it really isn't worth the high price of retribution. Its only a car. Please don't try to kill me and I won't try to kill you. If you try, I'll drive more defensively and back down. Promise. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeOhBe Bob Posted July 11, 2013 Author Share Posted July 11, 2013 (edited) Hmmm well good news...Dianey's got herself a new job, and a new set of wheels...new to her anyway a 2006 Jeep Liberty, and she fits like hand in glove with it. All the amenities, which is really nice, she certainly deserves it..and that leaves me the Durango. Not bad at least all the doors work, faster than the Dodge Ram all cargo space is covered...and people tailgate it like flies on dog crap. Our main drag (street for you opposite side of the ponders) is being ripped up to be resurfaced, so right now it's like driving on a cheese grater, and even worse the railroad crossing is just a huge horizontal pothole, except for the extreme edges on either side. So as I get up to the crossing I notice this nice new white Escalade (Escalade in Latin means nice way to throw away your money on something with a Cadillac logo without the Cadillac style) right on my ass. Directly AFTER the crossing is a steep hill, and ya know sometimes slow up the hill is worth it. Ahhh I notice my new friend has hit those tracks dead on and wow! Wonder what the steering wheel lodged in your solar plexus feels like hon! She lays back for a while...creeps up again near the light OOPS! Construction equipment and trucks coming at us...gotta stop short...three times, sorry! (For real, if not I get the nose shortener!) and aww sorry, I left ya at the red light.. I laughed Edited July 11, 2013 by BeOhBe Bob Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now