DonnaWanna Posted September 4, 2004 Share Posted September 4, 2004 Men are like ........Laxatives ...... They irritate the shit out of you. Men are like ........ Bananas ...... The older they get, the less firm they are. Men are like ........ Vacations ...... They never seem to be long enough. Men are like ........ Weather ...... Nothing can be done to change them. Men are like ........ Blenders ...... You need One, but you're not quite sure why. Men are like ........ Chocolate Bars ...... Sweet, smooth, &they usually head right for your hips. Men are like ....... Commercials ...... You can't believe a word they say. Men are like ........ Department Stores ...... Their clothes are always 1/2 off. Men are like ........ Government Bonds ...... They take soooooooo long to mature. Men are like ........ Mascara ...... They usually run at the first sign of emotion. Men are like ........ Popcorn . They satisfy you, but only for a little while. Men are like . Snowstorms ...... You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last. Men are like ........ Lava Lamps ...... Fun to look at, but not very bright. sorry guys if any of these offends yaz but some made me chuckle and thought the gurls would enjoy these Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DonnaWanna Posted September 4, 2004 Share Posted September 4, 2004 A young boy asks his father, "Dad, is it OK for us guys to notice all the different kind of boobs?" Surprised, the father answers, "Well, sure son. We wouldn't be normal if we didn't. There are all kinds of breasts, depending on a woman's age. In her 20s a woman's breasts are like melons, round and firm; in her 30s &40s they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit; and after 50 they are like onions..." "Onions, Dad?" "Yeah, you see them and they make you cry!" Not to be outdone, his sister asks her mother, "Mom, how many kind of penises are there?" The mother, delighted to have equal time, answers, "Well, daughter, a man goes through three phases -- In a man's 20s a man's penis is like an oak, mighty and hard; in his 30s &40s it is like a birch, flexible but reliable; and after 50 it is like a Christmas tree." "A Christmas tree?" Yep, dried up, and the balls are only there for decoration Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweetmiracle Posted September 4, 2004 Share Posted September 4, 2004 QUOTE (DonnaWanna @ Sep 4 2004, 02:22 PM) A young boy asks his father, "Dad, is it OK for us guys to notice all the different kind of boobs?" Surprised, the father answers, "Well, sure son. We wouldn't be normal if we didn't. There are all kinds of breasts, depending on a woman's age. In her 20s a woman's breasts are like melons, round and firm; in her 30s &40s they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit; and after 50 they are like onions..." "Onions, Dad?" "Yeah, you see them and they make you cry!" Not to be outdone, his sister asks her mother, "Mom, how many kind of penises are there?" The mother, delighted to have equal time, answers, "Well, daughter, a man goes through three phases -- In a man's 20s a man's penis is like an oak, mighty and hard; in his 30s &40s it is like a birch, flexible but reliable; and after 50 it is like a Christmas tree." "A Christmas tree?" Yep, dried up, and the balls are only there for decoration Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chasartymac Posted September 4, 2004 Share Posted September 4, 2004 Ahem http://img82.exs.cx/img82/9030/menandwomen.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neilpeart_gal Posted September 4, 2004 Share Posted September 4, 2004 Good one, baby!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RushRevisited Posted September 4, 2004 Share Posted September 4, 2004 QUOTE (Chasartymac @ Sep 4 2004, 02:42 PM) Ahem http://img82.exs.cx/img82/9030/menandwomen.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DonnaWanna Posted September 4, 2004 Share Posted September 4, 2004 http://img85.exs.cx/img85/8317/cWhatEveryManWasx.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweetmiracle Posted September 4, 2004 Share Posted September 4, 2004 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GhostGirl Posted September 4, 2004 Share Posted September 4, 2004 THOSE are classic....thanks for the giggles! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D-13 Posted September 4, 2004 Share Posted September 4, 2004 QUOTE (GhostGirl @ Sep 4 2004, 03:08 PM) THOSE are classic....thanks for the giggles! I agree!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladirushfan80 Posted September 5, 2004 Author Share Posted September 5, 2004 HEYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!! i didn't see the "AHEM".... wasssup wit dat? alright alright alright.... to the eye candy section ladies......... but first i gotta go get my http://www.abfnet.com/forum/images/smilies/morning.gif edited cuz i haven't had my coffee yet..... http://smilies.sofrayt.com/%5E/k/doh.gif Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Proggy Posted September 5, 2004 Share Posted September 5, 2004 It was about time I made my presence felt here! Many of you know me from Counterparts (Progaddicted), just decided to make the handle a little bit shorter on this forum. I'm definitely a lady and I definitely do like Rush!!! Tis a very cool board, great to join ya all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladirushfan80 Posted September 5, 2004 Author Share Posted September 5, 2004 http://smilies.sofrayt.com/fsc/bye.gif hi proggy!! welcome!!! here ya go!http://www.abfnet.com/forum/images/smilies/37.gif Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chasartymac Posted September 5, 2004 Share Posted September 5, 2004 QUOTE (Proggy @ Sep 5 2004, 02:37 PM) It was about time I made my presence felt here! Many of you know me from Counterparts (Progaddicted), just decided to make the handle a little bit shorter on this forum. I'm definitely a lady and I definitely do like Rush!!! Tis a very cool board, great to join ya all. Proggy!!! Hiya Great to see you. Haven't seen you about much of late. Get your pic in the picture forum and show these guys what a cutie you are. Of course not as cute as NPG, but close!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chasartymac Posted September 5, 2004 Share Posted September 5, 2004 HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN: 1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. 2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see your husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- make mental note -- must do more sit-ups. 4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins and minerals. 6. Wash your hair again just to make sure it's clean. 7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for fifteen minutes. 8. Wash your face with crusted apricot facial scrub for ten minutes until red. 9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 10. Rinse conditioner off hair (you must make sure that it all has come off). 11. Shave armpits and legs. Consider shaving bikini area but decide to get it waxed instead. 12. Scream loudly when your husband flushes the toilet and you lose water pressure. 13. Turn off shower. 14. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex. 15. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super-absorbent second towel. 16. Check entire body for the remotest sign of a zit. Tweeze hairs. 17. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 18. If you see your husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas and then sashay to bedroom to spend an hour and a half getting dressed. HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: 1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see your wife along the way, shake wiener at her while making the "woo-woo" sound. 3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror and suck in your gut to see if you have pecs somewhere in there (no). Admire the size of your wiener in the mirror and scratch your ass. 4. Get in the shower. 5. Don't bother to look for a washcloth (you don't use one). 6. Wash your face. 7. Wash your armpits. 8. Blow your nose in your hands, then let the water just rinse it off. 9. Crack up at how loud your fart sounds in the shower. 10. Spend majority of shower time washing your privates and surrounding area. 11. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs on the soap bar. 12. Shampoo your hair (do not use conditioner). 13. Make a shampoo Mohawk. 14. Peek out of shower curtain to look at yourself in the mirror again. 15. Pee (in the shower). 16. Rinse off and get out of the shower. Fail to notice water on the floor which pooled when you left the shower curtain hanging out of the tub for the entire duration of your shower. 17. Partially dry off. 18. Look at yourself in the mirror, flex muscles. Admire wiener size again. 19. Leave shower curtain open and wet bath mat on the floor. 20. Leave bathroom fan and light on. 21. Return to the bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass your wife, pull off the towel, shake wiener at her and make the "woo-woo" sound again. 22. Throw wet towel on the bed. Take two minutes to get dressed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neilpeart_gal Posted September 5, 2004 Share Posted September 5, 2004 Good one, baby. Hiya Proggy!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Proggy Posted September 5, 2004 Share Posted September 5, 2004 Thanks for the welcomes, new and old friends alike. Still LMAO to Chas' post, btw... And to be frank, I'm confused. Maybe I'm not such a lady, after all! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GhostGirl Posted September 5, 2004 Share Posted September 5, 2004 Love the "woo hoooing" part... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RushDoggie Posted September 5, 2004 Share Posted September 5, 2004 Helllllooooooo ladies! RushDoggie here: female Rush fan and fellow Neil (and sometimes Geddy) drooler. Long Live the Rush Chicks! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RushRevisited Posted September 5, 2004 Share Posted September 5, 2004 QUOTE (RushDoggie @ Sep 5 2004, 05:42 PM) Helllllooooooo ladies! RushDoggie here: female Rush fan and fellow Neil (and sometimes Geddy) drooler. Long Live the Rush Chicks! Welcome!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mystic vapor Posted September 6, 2004 Share Posted September 6, 2004 I'M A GEDDY FIEND! WHAT CAN I SAY? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GhostGirl Posted September 6, 2004 Share Posted September 6, 2004 QUOTE (RushDoggie @ Sep 5 2004, 04:42 PM)Helllllooooooo ladies! RushDoggie here: female Rush fan and fellow Neil (and sometimes Geddy) drooler. Long Live the Rush Chicks! WELCOME, RD! Great to have another Neil-Nymph on board! QUOTE (mystic vapor @ Sep 6 2004, 08:14 AM) I'M A GEDDY FIEND! WHAT CAN I SAY? We say, come on in! You're in good company here! Welcome to TRF. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LakesideMaiden Posted September 6, 2004 Share Posted September 6, 2004 QUOTE (mystic vapor @ Sep 6 2004, 09:14 AM) I'M A GEDDY FIEND! WHAT CAN I SAY? Good to have another fiend ! Have you been in our Geddy is Hot board yet? http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v407/lakesidemaiden/Geddy/Geddy-Lub.gif Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RushRevisited Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moonraker Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 QUOTE (RushRevisited @ Sep 6 2004, 05:09 PM) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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