You`re No Fun Anymore - Monty Python, Vol. 3

[IbanezJem]

29 minutes ago, blackhawkrush said:

I have never kissed the editor of the Radio Times.     

Could I speak to him please? It's the man from 'The Hay Wain'. 

[blackhawkrush]

3 hours ago, IbanezJem said:

Could I speak to him please? It's the man from 'The Hay Wain'. 

Well, where is he, George? He should have been here hours ago. He bloody should have been.  

[IbanezJem]

23 minutes ago, blackhawkrush said:

Well, where is he, George? He should have been here hours ago. He bloody should have been.  

There seems to have been an accident. Well, several accidents actually. 

[blackhawkrush]

4 hours ago, IbanezJem said:

There seems to have been an accident. Well, several accidents actually. 

     Bally Jerry, pranged his kite right in the how's-your-father, harry blighter, dicky-birded, feathered back on his sammy, took a waspy, flipped over on his Betty Harpers and caught his can in the Bertie. 

[IbanezJem]

13 hours ago, blackhawkrush said:

     Bally Jerry, pranged his kite right in the how's-your-father, harry blighter, dicky-birded, feathered back on his sammy, took a waspy, flipped over on his Betty Harpers and caught his can in the Bertie. 

Don't come here with that posh talk you nasty, stuck-up twit. 

[blackhawkrush]

5 hours ago, IbanezJem said:

Don't come here with that posh talk you nasty, stuck-up twit. 

I meant, Simon, that uh, like a doughnut your arrival at the thread gives us pleasure and your departure merely makes us hungry for more. 

[1-0-0-1-0-0-1]

5 hours ago, blackhawkrush said:

I meant, Simon, that uh, like a doughnut your arrival at the thread gives us pleasure and your departure merely makes us hungry for more. 

 

Blackhawk, you are also like a stream of bat's piss.   I merely meant that you shine out like a shaft of gold when all around is dark.

[blackhawkrush]

2 hours ago, 1-0-0-1-0-0-1 said:

 

Blackhawk, you are also like a stream of bat's piss.   I merely meant that you shine out like a shaft of gold when all around is dark.

Oh it's a treat, it really is, 'cause otherwise those stone caves can be so grim.    

[IbanezJem]

21 hours ago, blackhawkrush said:

Oh it's a treat, it really is, 'cause otherwise those stone caves can be so grim.    

Well, there's only this room, the bedroom, a spare room. 

[blackhawkrush]

2 hours ago, IbanezJem said:

Well, there's only this room, the bedroom, a spare room. 

You can put    in the sitting room if he's in the drawing room.  

[IbanezJem]

13 minutes ago, blackhawkrush said:

You can put    in the sitting room if he's in the drawing room.  

Yes, we met in the Turkish bath yesterday. 

[blackhawkrush]

2 hours ago, IbanezJem said:

Yes, we met in the Turkish bath yesterday. 

This smutty piece of    was used by the Turks to ram up each other's... 

[1-0-0-1-0-0-1]

9 minutes ago, blackhawkrush said:

This smutty piece of    was used by the Turks to ram up each other's... 

 

Yes, yes...but have you any plans for dealing with the free-scoring Turkish forwards?

[IbanezJem]

5 minutes ago, 1-0-0-1-0-0-1 said:

 

Yes, yes...but have you any plans for dealing with the free-scoring Turkish forwards?

I'm going to lay down some sheep poison. 

[blackhawkrush]

2 hours ago, IbanezJem said:

I'm going to lay down some sheep poison. 

And mind you don't get seduced.    

[IbanezJem]

22 minutes ago, blackhawkrush said:

And mind you don't get seduced.    

 I don't like darkies.

[blackhawkrush]

2 hours ago, IbanezJem said:

 I don't like darkies.

Next week on 'Book at Bedtime', Jeremy Toogood will be reading Anna Sewell's 'Black Bu..Bue...Burton...Blakc Bottoon'.   

[IbanezJem]

4 minutes ago, blackhawkrush said:

Next week on 'Book at Bedtime', Jeremy Toogood will be reading Anna Sewell's 'Black Bu..Bue...Burton...Blakc Bottoon'.   

 Yes. I thought we were here to discuss archaeology.

[1-0-0-1-0-0-1]

17 hours ago, IbanezJem said:

 Yes. I thought we were here to discuss archaeology.

 

No, you came here for an argument.

[blackhawkrush]

20 hours ago, 1-0-0-1-0-0-1 said:

 

No, you came here for an argument.

Look, I came here to learn how to fly an aeroplane.    

[IbanezJem]

23 minutes ago, blackhawkrush said:

Look, I came here to learn how to fly an aeroplane.    

You can start in small ways with ping-pong ball eyes and a funny voice and then you can paint half of your body red and the other half green and then you can jump up and down in a bowl of treacle going 'squawk, squawk, squawk...' And then you can go 'Neurhhh! Neurhh!' and then you can roll around on the floor going 'pting pting pting'. 

[1-0-0-1-0-0-1]

11 minutes ago, IbanezJem said:

You can start in small ways with ping-pong ball eyes and a funny voice and then you can paint half of your body red and the other half green and then you can jump up and down in a bowl of treacle going 'squawk, squawk, squawk...' And then you can go 'Neurhhh! Neurhh!' and then you can roll around on the floor going 'pting pting pting'. 

 

Well, last week we showed you how to become a gynecologist. And this week on "How To Do It" we're going to show you how to play the flute, how to split an atom, and how to construct a box girder bridge.

[blackhawkrush]

2 hours ago, 1-0-0-1-0-0-1 said:

 

Well, last week we showed you how to become a gynecologist. And this week on "How To Do It" we're going to show you how to play the flute, how to split an atom, and how to construct a box girder bridge.

We knew that. Switch him off.  

[IbanezJem]

36 minutes ago, blackhawkrush said:

We knew that. Switch him off.  

I preferred the dirty version.

[1-0-0-1-0-0-1]

18 minutes ago, IbanezJem said:

I preferred the dirty version.

 

Now...sex. Sex, sex, sex. Where were we? Well, had I done foreplay?