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And Now for Something Completely Different...Monty Python Thread v.2


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Are there any regiments which are more effeminate than others?

I'll scratch your eyes out. :cheerleader:

A scratch? Your arm's off.

tell you what. All those people who don't want to stay here and shoot themselves, raise their arms.

The vote was unanimous :atickhum: with one abstention.

You don't vote for Kings.

 

Well how'd you become king?

What number did he give you this time, Louis the 23rd? :eyeroll:

Camels don't have numbers. :huh:

I'm afraid what you've got hold of there is an anteater.

Hey, you've got two legs missing! And that's a false feeler, Marcus! Blimey! :rose:

You want to complain ... look at these shoes ... I've only had them three weeks and the heels are worn right through. If you complain nothing happens ... you might just as well not bother. My back hurts and ...

Oh, it's his writer's cramp! :o

No.. he's down again and writing Dennis, he's written THE again, he's crossed it out again and he has written A and there is a second word coming up straight away, it is SAT, a sat, doesn't make sense a sat, a Saturday, it is a SATURDAY and the crowd are loving it.

In a few moments, he will have written the funniest joke in the world... and, as a consequence, he will die ... laughing.

Ha, ha, ha, :laughing yellow guy: Lookout of the Yard.
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Are there any regiments which are more effeminate than others?

I'll scratch your eyes out. :cheerleader:

A scratch? Your arm's off.

tell you what. All those people who don't want to stay here and shoot themselves, raise their arms.

The vote was unanimous :atickhum: with one abstention.

You don't vote for Kings.

 

Well how'd you become king?

What number did he give you this time, Louis the 23rd? :eyeroll:

Camels don't have numbers. :huh:

I'm afraid what you've got hold of there is an anteater.

Hey, you've got two legs missing! And that's a false feeler, Marcus! Blimey! :rose:

You want to complain ... look at these shoes ... I've only had them three weeks and the heels are worn right through. If you complain nothing happens ... you might just as well not bother. My back hurts and ...

Oh, it's his writer's cramp! :o

No.. he's down again and writing Dennis, he's written THE again, he's crossed it out again and he has written A and there is a second word coming up straight away, it is SAT, a sat, doesn't make sense a sat, a Saturday, it is a SATURDAY and the crowd are loving it.

In a few moments, he will have written the funniest joke in the world... and, as a consequence, he will die ... laughing.

Ha, ha, ha, :laughing yellow guy: Lookout of the Yard.

Nobody likes a good laugh more than I do...except perhaps my wife and some of her friends...oh yes and Captain Johnston. Come to think of it most people likes a good laugh more than I do. But that's beside the point.
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Are there any regiments which are more effeminate than others?

I'll scratch your eyes out. :cheerleader:

A scratch? Your arm's off.

tell you what. All those people who don't want to stay here and shoot themselves, raise their arms.

The vote was unanimous :atickhum: with one abstention.

You don't vote for Kings.

 

Well how'd you become king?

What number did he give you this time, Louis the 23rd? :eyeroll:

Camels don't have numbers. :huh:

I'm afraid what you've got hold of there is an anteater.

Hey, you've got two legs missing! And that's a false feeler, Marcus! Blimey! :rose:

You want to complain ... look at these shoes ... I've only had them three weeks and the heels are worn right through. If you complain nothing happens ... you might just as well not bother. My back hurts and ...

Oh, it's his writer's cramp! :o

No.. he's down again and writing Dennis, he's written THE again, he's crossed it out again and he has written A and there is a second word coming up straight away, it is SAT, a sat, doesn't make sense a sat, a Saturday, it is a SATURDAY and the crowd are loving it.

In a few moments, he will have written the funniest joke in the world... and, as a consequence, he will die ... laughing.

Ha, ha, ha, :laughing yellow guy: Lookout of the Yard.

Nobody likes a good laugh more than I do...except perhaps my wife and some of her friends...oh yes and Captain Johnston. Come to think of it most people likes a good laugh more than I do. But that's beside the point.

Sorry about the Tudor bit, but you can't be too careful, you know. Have a look through these. :drool:
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Are there any regiments which are more effeminate than others?

I'll scratch your eyes out. :cheerleader:

A scratch? Your arm's off.

tell you what. All those people who don't want to stay here and shoot themselves, raise their arms.

The vote was unanimous :atickhum: with one abstention.

You don't vote for Kings.

 

Well how'd you become king?

What number did he give you this time, Louis the 23rd? :eyeroll:

Camels don't have numbers. :huh:

I'm afraid what you've got hold of there is an anteater.

Hey, you've got two legs missing! And that's a false feeler, Marcus! Blimey! :rose:

You want to complain ... look at these shoes ... I've only had them three weeks and the heels are worn right through. If you complain nothing happens ... you might just as well not bother. My back hurts and ...

Oh, it's his writer's cramp! :o

No.. he's down again and writing Dennis, he's written THE again, he's crossed it out again and he has written A and there is a second word coming up straight away, it is SAT, a sat, doesn't make sense a sat, a Saturday, it is a SATURDAY and the crowd are loving it.

In a few moments, he will have written the funniest joke in the world... and, as a consequence, he will die ... laughing.

Ha, ha, ha, :laughing yellow guy: Lookout of the Yard.

Nobody likes a good laugh more than I do...except perhaps my wife and some of her friends...oh yes and Captain Johnston. Come to think of it most people likes a good laugh more than I do. But that's beside the point.

Sorry about the Tudor bit, but you can't be too careful, you know. Have a look through these. :drool:

This is Uncle Ted in front of the house....This is Uncle Ted at the back of the house.... And this is Uncle Ted at the side of the house.....This is Uncle Ted back in front of the house, but you can see the side of the house.....And this is Uncle Ted even nearer the side of the house, but you can still see the front......This is the back of the house, with Uncle Ted coming round the side to the front.
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Are there any regiments which are more effeminate than others?

I'll scratch your eyes out. :cheerleader:

A scratch? Your arm's off.

tell you what. All those people who don't want to stay here and shoot themselves, raise their arms.

The vote was unanimous :atickhum: with one abstention.

You don't vote for Kings.

 

Well how'd you become king?

What number did he give you this time, Louis the 23rd? :eyeroll:

Camels don't have numbers. :huh:

I'm afraid what you've got hold of there is an anteater.

Hey, you've got two legs missing! And that's a false feeler, Marcus! Blimey! :rose:

You want to complain ... look at these shoes ... I've only had them three weeks and the heels are worn right through. If you complain nothing happens ... you might just as well not bother. My back hurts and ...

Oh, it's his writer's cramp! :o

No.. he's down again and writing Dennis, he's written THE again, he's crossed it out again and he has written A and there is a second word coming up straight away, it is SAT, a sat, doesn't make sense a sat, a Saturday, it is a SATURDAY and the crowd are loving it.

In a few moments, he will have written the funniest joke in the world... and, as a consequence, he will die ... laughing.

Ha, ha, ha, :laughing yellow guy: Lookout of the Yard.

Nobody likes a good laugh more than I do...except perhaps my wife and some of her friends...oh yes and Captain Johnston. Come to think of it most people likes a good laugh more than I do. But that's beside the point.

Sorry about the Tudor bit, but you can't be too careful, you know. Have a look through these. :drool:

This is Uncle Ted in front of the house....This is Uncle Ted at the back of the house.... And this is Uncle Ted at the side of the house.....This is Uncle Ted back in front of the house, but you can see the side of the house.....And this is Uncle Ted even nearer the side of the house, but you can still see the front......This is the back of the house, with Uncle Ted coming round the side to the front.

I wave my private parts at your aunties. :P
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Are there any regiments which are more effeminate than others?

I'll scratch your eyes out. :cheerleader:

A scratch? Your arm's off.

tell you what. All those people who don't want to stay here and shoot themselves, raise their arms.

The vote was unanimous :atickhum: with one abstention.

You don't vote for Kings.

 

Well how'd you become king?

What number did he give you this time, Louis the 23rd? :eyeroll:

Camels don't have numbers. :huh:

I'm afraid what you've got hold of there is an anteater.

Hey, you've got two legs missing! And that's a false feeler, Marcus! Blimey! :rose:

You want to complain ... look at these shoes ... I've only had them three weeks and the heels are worn right through. If you complain nothing happens ... you might just as well not bother. My back hurts and ...

Oh, it's his writer's cramp! :o

No.. he's down again and writing Dennis, he's written THE again, he's crossed it out again and he has written A and there is a second word coming up straight away, it is SAT, a sat, doesn't make sense a sat, a Saturday, it is a SATURDAY and the crowd are loving it.

In a few moments, he will have written the funniest joke in the world... and, as a consequence, he will die ... laughing.

Ha, ha, ha, :laughing yellow guy: Lookout of the Yard.

Nobody likes a good laugh more than I do...except perhaps my wife and some of her friends...oh yes and Captain Johnston. Come to think of it most people likes a good laugh more than I do. But that's beside the point.

Sorry about the Tudor bit, but you can't be too careful, you know. Have a look through these. :drool:

This is Uncle Ted in front of the house....This is Uncle Ted at the back of the house.... And this is Uncle Ted at the side of the house.....This is Uncle Ted back in front of the house, but you can see the side of the house.....And this is Uncle Ted even nearer the side of the house, but you can still see the front......This is the back of the house, with Uncle Ted coming round the side to the front.

I wave my private parts at your aunties. :P

This is mouse country, where a man can ride for days and days without seeing his aunty.
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It's like a bloody graveyard. :rose: I hate it.

You can't just dump a dead body in my court and say 'no further questions'. I demand an explanation.
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It's like a bloody graveyard. :rose: I hate it.

You can't just dump a dead body in my court and say 'no further questions'. I demand an explanation.

Sorry, sorry. See what I mean, I just get carried away. I really must... :smash: sorry, sorry! Sorry, everyone
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It's like a bloody graveyard. :rose: I hate it.

You can't just dump a dead body in my court and say 'no further questions'. I demand an explanation.

Sorry, sorry. See what I mean, I just get carried away. I really must... :smash: sorry, sorry! Sorry, everyone

It was a very very bad thing to have done and I'm really very ashamed of myself. I can only say it won't happen again. To have murdered so many people in such a short space of time is really awful, and I really am very, very, very sorry that I did it, and also that I've taken up so much of the court's valuable time listening to the sordid details of these senseless killings of mine.
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It's like a bloody graveyard. :rose: I hate it.

You can't just dump a dead body in my court and say 'no further questions'. I demand an explanation.

Sorry, sorry. See what I mean, I just get carried away. I really must... :smash: sorry, sorry! Sorry, everyone

It was a very very bad thing to have done and I'm really very ashamed of myself. I can only say it won't happen again. To have murdered so many people in such a short space of time is really awful, and I really am very, very, very sorry that I did it, and also that I've taken up so much of the court's valuable time listening to the sordid details of these senseless killings of mine.

There are no members of the Government dead in our sitting room. :boohoo:
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It's like a bloody graveyard. :rose: I hate it.

You can't just dump a dead body in my court and say 'no further questions'. I demand an explanation.

Sorry, sorry. See what I mean, I just get carried away. I really must... :smash: sorry, sorry! Sorry, everyone

It was a very very bad thing to have done and I'm really very ashamed of myself. I can only say it won't happen again. To have murdered so many people in such a short space of time is really awful, and I really am very, very, very sorry that I did it, and also that I've taken up so much of the court's valuable time listening to the sordid details of these senseless killings of mine.

There are no members of the Government dead in our sitting room. :boohoo:

No murder. :huh: Oh. I don't like it. It's too simple, too clear cut. :no:
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It's like a bloody graveyard. :rose: I hate it.

You can't just dump a dead body in my court and say 'no further questions'. I demand an explanation.

Sorry, sorry. See what I mean, I just get carried away. I really must... :smash: sorry, sorry! Sorry, everyone

It was a very very bad thing to have done and I'm really very ashamed of myself. I can only say it won't happen again. To have murdered so many people in such a short space of time is really awful, and I really am very, very, very sorry that I did it, and also that I've taken up so much of the court's valuable time listening to the sordid details of these senseless killings of mine.

There are no members of the Government dead in our sitting room. :boohoo:

No murder. :huh: Oh. I don't like it. It's too simple, too clear cut. :no:

I thought you said it was a burglary.
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It's like a bloody graveyard. :rose: I hate it.

You can't just dump a dead body in my court and say 'no further questions'. I demand an explanation.

Sorry, sorry. See what I mean, I just get carried away. I really must... :smash: sorry, sorry! Sorry, everyone

It was a very very bad thing to have done and I'm really very ashamed of myself. I can only say it won't happen again. To have murdered so many people in such a short space of time is really awful, and I really am very, very, very sorry that I did it, and also that I've taken up so much of the court's valuable time listening to the sordid details of these senseless killings of mine.

There are no members of the Government dead in our sitting room. :boohoo:

No murder. :huh: Oh. I don't like it. It's too simple, too clear cut. :no:

I thought you said it was a burglary.

We spent weeks organizing this job. Reg rented a room across the road and filmed the people going in and out every day. Vic spent three weeks looking at watch catalogues...until he knew the price of each one backwards, and now I'm not going to risk the whole raid just for the sake of breaking the law. :tsk:
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It's like a bloody graveyard. :rose: I hate it.

You can't just dump a dead body in my court and say 'no further questions'. I demand an explanation.

Sorry, sorry. See what I mean, I just get carried away. I really must... :smash: sorry, sorry! Sorry, everyone

It was a very very bad thing to have done and I'm really very ashamed of myself. I can only say it won't happen again. To have murdered so many people in such a short space of time is really awful, and I really am very, very, very sorry that I did it, and also that I've taken up so much of the court's valuable time listening to the sordid details of these senseless killings of mine.

There are no members of the Government dead in our sitting room. :boohoo:

No murder. :huh: Oh. I don't like it. It's too simple, too clear cut. :no:

I thought you said it was a burglary.

We spent weeks organizing this job. Reg rented a room across the road and filmed the people going in and out every day. Vic spent three weeks looking at watch catalogues...until he knew the price of each one backwards, and now I'm not going to risk the whole raid just for the sake of breaking the law. :tsk:

What? I wouldn't buy two thousand clocks. :crazy:
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It's like a bloody graveyard. :rose: I hate it.

You can't just dump a dead body in my court and say 'no further questions'. I demand an explanation.

Sorry, sorry. See what I mean, I just get carried away. I really must... :smash: sorry, sorry! Sorry, everyone

It was a very very bad thing to have done and I'm really very ashamed of myself. I can only say it won't happen again. To have murdered so many people in such a short space of time is really awful, and I really am very, very, very sorry that I did it, and also that I've taken up so much of the court's valuable time listening to the sordid details of these senseless killings of mine.

There are no members of the Government dead in our sitting room. :boohoo:

No murder. :huh: Oh. I don't like it. It's too simple, too clear cut. :no:

I thought you said it was a burglary.

We spent weeks organizing this job. Reg rented a room across the road and filmed the people going in and out every day. Vic spent three weeks looking at watch catalogues...until he knew the price of each one backwards, and now I'm not going to risk the whole raid just for the sake of breaking the law. :tsk:

What? I wouldn't buy two thousand clocks. :crazy:

All right - I'll be the alarm clock. When I go off, look at me and use the phrase, OK?
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It's like a bloody graveyard. :rose: I hate it.

You can't just dump a dead body in my court and say 'no further questions'. I demand an explanation.

Sorry, sorry. See what I mean, I just get carried away. I really must... :smash: sorry, sorry! Sorry, everyone

It was a very very bad thing to have done and I'm really very ashamed of myself. I can only say it won't happen again. To have murdered so many people in such a short space of time is really awful, and I really am very, very, very sorry that I did it, and also that I've taken up so much of the court's valuable time listening to the sordid details of these senseless killings of mine.

There are no members of the Government dead in our sitting room. :boohoo:

No murder. :huh: Oh. I don't like it. It's too simple, too clear cut. :no:

I thought you said it was a burglary.

We spent weeks organizing this job. Reg rented a room across the road and filmed the people going in and out every day. Vic spent three weeks looking at watch catalogues...until he knew the price of each one backwards, and now I'm not going to risk the whole raid just for the sake of breaking the law. :tsk:

What? I wouldn't buy two thousand clocks. :crazy:

All right - I'll be the alarm clock. When I go off, look at me and use the phrase, OK?

I don't know it. They didn't say anything about a punchline.
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It's like a bloody graveyard. :rose: I hate it.

You can't just dump a dead body in my court and say 'no further questions'. I demand an explanation.

Sorry, sorry. See what I mean, I just get carried away. I really must... :smash: sorry, sorry! Sorry, everyone

It was a very very bad thing to have done and I'm really very ashamed of myself. I can only say it won't happen again. To have murdered so many people in such a short space of time is really awful, and I really am very, very, very sorry that I did it, and also that I've taken up so much of the court's valuable time listening to the sordid details of these senseless killings of mine.

There are no members of the Government dead in our sitting room. :boohoo:

No murder. :huh: Oh. I don't like it. It's too simple, too clear cut. :no:

I thought you said it was a burglary.

We spent weeks organizing this job. Reg rented a room across the road and filmed the people going in and out every day. Vic spent three weeks looking at watch catalogues...until he knew the price of each one backwards, and now I'm not going to risk the whole raid just for the sake of breaking the law. :tsk:

What? I wouldn't buy two thousand clocks. :crazy:

All right - I'll be the alarm clock. When I go off, look at me and use the phrase, OK?

I don't know it. They didn't say anything about a punchline.

But if you can find a piano stool, you can appear later on in the thread on film. :ebert:
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It's like a bloody graveyard. :rose: I hate it.

You can't just dump a dead body in my court and say 'no further questions'. I demand an explanation.

Sorry, sorry. See what I mean, I just get carried away. I really must... :smash: sorry, sorry! Sorry, everyone

It was a very very bad thing to have done and I'm really very ashamed of myself. I can only say it won't happen again. To have murdered so many people in such a short space of time is really awful, and I really am very, very, very sorry that I did it, and also that I've taken up so much of the court's valuable time listening to the sordid details of these senseless killings of mine.

There are no members of the Government dead in our sitting room. :boohoo:

No murder. :huh: Oh. I don't like it. It's too simple, too clear cut. :no:

I thought you said it was a burglary.

We spent weeks organizing this job. Reg rented a room across the road and filmed the people going in and out every day. Vic spent three weeks looking at watch catalogues...until he knew the price of each one backwards, and now I'm not going to risk the whole raid just for the sake of breaking the law. :tsk:

What? I wouldn't buy two thousand clocks. :crazy:

All right - I'll be the alarm clock. When I go off, look at me and use the phrase, OK?

I don't know it. They didn't say anything about a punchline.

But if you can find a piano stool, you can appear later on in the thread on film. :ebert:

Nothing to do with me. I'm not in this thread. This is page 76 - I'm not in until page 77. I'm just learning my lines, you know.
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It's like a bloody graveyard. :rose: I hate it.

You can't just dump a dead body in my court and say 'no further questions'. I demand an explanation.

Sorry, sorry. See what I mean, I just get carried away. I really must... :smash: sorry, sorry! Sorry, everyone

It was a very very bad thing to have done and I'm really very ashamed of myself. I can only say it won't happen again. To have murdered so many people in such a short space of time is really awful, and I really am very, very, very sorry that I did it, and also that I've taken up so much of the court's valuable time listening to the sordid details of these senseless killings of mine.

There are no members of the Government dead in our sitting room. :boohoo:

No murder. :huh: Oh. I don't like it. It's too simple, too clear cut. :no:

I thought you said it was a burglary.

We spent weeks organizing this job. Reg rented a room across the road and filmed the people going in and out every day. Vic spent three weeks looking at watch catalogues...until he knew the price of each one backwards, and now I'm not going to risk the whole raid just for the sake of breaking the law. :tsk:

What? I wouldn't buy two thousand clocks. :crazy:

All right - I'll be the alarm clock. When I go off, look at me and use the phrase, OK?

I don't know it. They didn't say anything about a punchline.

But if you can find a piano stool, you can appear later on in the thread on film. :ebert:

Nothing to do with me. I'm not in this thread. This is page 76 - I'm not in until page 77. I'm just learning my lines, you know.

Oh yeah, it's not easy to pad these out to eighty pages.
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Oh my God - I haven't laughed this much in years! :LMAO:

It's all in a day's work for Confuse-a-Cat Ltd. Edited by Your_Lion
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Oh my God - I haven't laughed this much in years! :LMAO:

It's all in a day's work for Confuse-a-Cat Ltd.

Now wait a minute. I have already warned this thread about infringing the Army copyright of our slogan 'It's a pig's life... man's life in the modern army'. And I'm warning you if it happens again, I shall come down on this thread like a ton of bricks... right :16ton:
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Oh my God - I haven't laughed this much in years! :LMAO:

It's all in a day's work for Confuse-a-Cat Ltd.

Now wait a minute. I have already warned this thread about infringing the Army copyright of our slogan 'It's a pig's life... man's life in the modern army'. And I'm warning you if it happens again, I shall come down on this thread like a ton of bricks... right :16ton:

Well, supposing you haven't got a gun or a sixteen-ton weight?
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Oh my God - I haven't laughed this much in years! :LMAO:

It's all in a day's work for Confuse-a-Cat Ltd.

Now wait a minute. I have already warned this thread about infringing the Army copyright of our slogan 'It's a pig's life... man's life in the modern army'. And I'm warning you if it happens again, I shall come down on this thread like a ton of bricks... right :16ton:

Well, supposing you haven't got a gun or a sixteen-ton weight?

He used sarcasm. He knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes and satire
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