High School Sucks.

[The_Necromancer_77]

Alright, here we go. First, I'd like to say I'm 16 and going into my Junior year this September. Freshman year I was extremely depressed and almost dropped out. Sophomore year was only slightly better because I had an alternative class every day that was a little relaxed.

 

But I still hate high school. I don't care what people say-High school isn't for everyone. I wish in this day and age it could still be possible to drop out and get a good job.

 

A lot of people who I talk to about this say: Oh but high school is so great! You'll make a lot of awesome friends and memories! PROM!!! Fun!!! Really? I haven't had any fun. I've only made one friend who I actually like, and they just graduated.

 

I dread going back this year. Does anyone know of an alternative? I've heard you can take classes online. The only alternative school nearby isn't accepting anyone my age this year. Help

[1 of the 7]

I feel for you...I couldn't wait to escape. I hope you find another way, but if not, hang in there, because college (if you choose to go) is so different.

 

Any way you can do an internship on the job for class credit? I considered study abroad, but I don't know if that would be better or worse, but at least it would get you out of where you are. I don't know if you could do something like volunteer corps while still in high school, but maybe that's a possibility, even if it means delaying graduation?

 

You're not alone, that's for sure. I felt I was while in school, and wish I'd known I wasn't.

[The_Necromancer_77]

QUOTE (1 of the 7 @ Jul 26 2011, 05:46 PM)

I feel for you...I couldn't wait to escape. I hope you find another way, but if not, hang in there, because college (if you choose to go) is so different. Any way you can do an internship on the job for class credit? I considered study abroad, but I don't know if that would be better or worse, but at least it would get you out of where you are. I don't know if you could do something like volunteer corps while still in high school, but maybe that's a possibility, even if it means delaying graduation? You're not alone, that's for sure. I felt I was while in school, and wish I'd known I wasn't.

We have something called CE2 where you go work at jobs for most of the school day. But I have social anxiety, so I decided against it.

 

I haven't really heard of any of those other things. I think I'll ask my counselor about options but I don't want to even spend one day at school this year. And I know that since they're a school counselor, they'll probably try to get me to change my mind.

 

It's hard to feel anything but alone sometimes.

[danielmclark]

You're not alone, even if it feels like it. It's cliche, but true: millions of people have been right where you are now. For better or worse (and this might sound a little unhelpful), you're not unique in this situation. It's been done before, and frequently.

 

So, I have two things to add to this. First, see if you can test out. Some school districts in some states will let you test out of high school.

 

Second, you said you have social anxiety. That's a problem if you don't even want to go to a job to get out of the school system you hate so much. That says to me that your anxiety is more of a problem than the school - and probably contributes to your feelings about the school in a circular way. Advice? Talk to a therapist, talk to your parents, talk to TRF'ers, if that'll help. Just talk. And if you do see a professional, resist being put on medication of any kind unless you get a second and third opinion. Too many professionals are too quick to prescribe to kids today.

[The_Necromancer_77]

QUOTE (danielmclark @ Jul 26 2011, 07:23 PM)

You're not alone, even if it feels like it. It's cliche, but true: millions of people have been right where you are now. For better or worse (and this might sound a little unhelpful), you're not unique in this situation. It's been done before, and frequently. So, I have two things to add to this. First, see if you can test out. Some school districts in some states will let you test out of high school. Second, you said you have social anxiety. That's a problem if you don't even want to go to a job to get out of the school system you hate so much. That says to me that your anxiety is more of a problem than the school - and probably contributes to your feelings about the school in a circular way. Advice? Talk to a therapist, talk to your parents, talk to TRF'ers, if that'll help. Just talk. And if you do see a professional, resist being put on medication of any kind unless you get a second and third opinion. Too many professionals are too quick to prescribe to kids today.

I know. It's nice to know that other people have made it, I guess.

 

I've never heard of doing the testing thing, so i'm pretty sure you can't do it here. I'd probably bomb it anyway. I get below average scores in science and math.

 

I've seen a therapist twice before. I really wish they would have prescribed me something, because I know you control your thoughts, but I just can't do it. It's been two-three years now and it just keeps getting worse. Doesn't help that good therapy is expensive (though I know they have options to get it cheaper through insurance etc)

 

The thing about talking is that I always end up talking my friends' ears off. I end up feeling embarrassed that I'm always leaning on them for help and being sad and a burden. I don't feel close enough with my parents to talk to them.

 

ahhhh life is so great!

[ioc]

Before high school I was on top. But, I had to grow up fast as a teen. It made me realize how sucky and fake all my junior-high friends were. So, I ended up entering high school a different person. I looked at it like a job. I took whatever elective classes I thought would help me the most in life and kind of took the attitude, "I didn't come here to make friends". That's not to say I was a complete loner. I was nice to people I met and there were those that were nice to me. And those who weren't inclined to be nice to me left me alone. I wasn't rude or nasty to them nor did I try to get their attention. Social endeavors were just no longer my priority and didn't control me.

 

High school is not real life. The only real thing is how it trains people to behave after they graduate. You'd be surprised how similar office politics are to high school stupidity. So all it accomplishes is teaching the wrong social lessons.

 

High school can be a tool. Get what you can from it, then forget about it when it's over. It is the Juicebox of life. If you're school does, in fact, suck, then maybe it would be good to look into options where you can actually learn something. (Didn't have those options when I was in school...and mine suh-uh-uh-uh-ucked!! But I did the best I could with a half-empty Juicebox).

 

Good luck kiddo! You may have to walk through the doors alone...but we're rooting for you. And you can come home and if you need to let it out, we'll listen and threaten to kick the bastards' asses. http://gfxlovers.com/smilies/imgs/love/love014.gif

 

[nettiesaur]

QUOTE (The_Necromancer_77 @ Jul 26 2011, 08:37 PM)

QUOTE (danielmclark @ Jul 26 2011, 07:23 PM) You're not alone, even if it feels like it. It's cliche, but true: millions of people have been right where you are now. For better or worse (and this might sound a little unhelpful), you're not unique in this situation. It's been done before, and frequently. So, I have two things to add to this. First, see if you can test out. Some school districts in some states will let you test out of high school. Second, you said you have social anxiety. That's a problem if you don't even want to go to a job to get out of the school system you hate so much. That says to me that your anxiety is more of a problem than the school - and probably contributes to your feelings about the school in a circular way. Advice? Talk to a therapist, talk to your parents, talk to TRF'ers, if that'll help. Just talk. And if you do see a professional, resist being put on medication of any kind unless you get a second and third opinion. Too many professionals are too quick to prescribe to kids today. I know. It's nice to know that other people have made it, I guess.   I've never heard of doing the testing thing, so i'm pretty sure you can't do it here. I'd probably bomb it anyway. I get below average scores in science and math.   I've seen a therapist twice before. I really wish they would have prescribed me something, because I know you control your thoughts, but I just can't do it. It's been two-three years now and it just keeps getting worse. Doesn't help that good therapy is expensive (though I know they have options to get it cheaper through insurance etc)   The thing about talking is that I always end up talking my friends' ears off. I end up feeling embarrassed that I'm always leaning on them for help and being sad and a burden. I don't feel close enough with my parents to talk to them.   ahhhh life is so great! Another survivor here. and I'm a teacher now.   It sounds like you need to talk to your parents, even though you don't feel close to them. They probably don't know how you feel, and don't have a clue that you want to do something else, or finish school in a different way and are also depressed. Yup. Parents are not mind readers, and need you to tell them what's wrong, so they can help you!

[The_Necromancer_77]

QUOTE (nettiesaur @ Jul 26 2011, 08:50 PM)

QUOTE (The_Necromancer_77 @ Jul 26 2011, 08:37 PM) QUOTE (danielmclark @ Jul 26 2011, 07:23 PM) You're not alone, even if it feels like it. It's cliche, but true: millions of people have been right where you are now. For better or worse (and this might sound a little unhelpful), you're not unique in this situation. It's been done before, and frequently. So, I have two things to add to this. First, see if you can test out. Some school districts in some states will let you test out of high school. Second, you said you have social anxiety. That's a problem if you don't even want to go to a job to get out of the school system you hate so much. That says to me that your anxiety is more of a problem than the school - and probably contributes to your feelings about the school in a circular way. Advice? Talk to a therapist, talk to your parents, talk to TRF'ers, if that'll help. Just talk. And if you do see a professional, resist being put on medication of any kind unless you get a second and third opinion. Too many professionals are too quick to prescribe to kids today. I know. It's nice to know that other people have made it, I guess.   I've never heard of doing the testing thing, so i'm pretty sure you can't do it here. I'd probably bomb it anyway. I get below average scores in science and math.   I've seen a therapist twice before. I really wish they would have prescribed me something, because I know you control your thoughts, but I just can't do it. It's been two-three years now and it just keeps getting worse. Doesn't help that good therapy is expensive (though I know they have options to get it cheaper through insurance etc)   The thing about talking is that I always end up talking my friends' ears off. I end up feeling embarrassed that I'm always leaning on them for help and being sad and a burden. I don't feel close enough with my parents to talk to them.   ahhhh life is so great! Another survivor here. and I'm a teacher now.   It sounds like you need to talk to your parents, even though you don't feel close to them. They probably don't know how you feel, and don't have a clue that you want to do something else, or finish school in a different way and are also depressed. Yup. Parents are not mind readers, and need you to tell them what's wrong, so they can help you! I've talked to my parents about it before, so I'm a little reluctant to bring it up again. My mom seems to be more open to Alternative things, since she took some Alt classes in high school. My dad, although, seems to think alternatives are just for 'dumb' kids and 'stoners'.   I'll try to talk to them soon. I might be able to find out about something. I dunno. All I know is that I don't want to set foot in my high school ever again :x   Thanks for all your support, guys.

[laughedatbytime]

I absolutely hated high school so I know how you feel. Subdivisions, as poignant as it is, doesn't even begin to explain my experiences.

 

I'm reluctant to advise you to seek alternatives because I think surviving it was necessary for me to go through college and in entering the work world, but there are virtual high schools that you could try if you absolutely can't deal with it. I'm not sure where you're from but you may be able to find something using Google.

 

In any case, good luck in whatever you decide to do...I know it's a bit of a cliche, but I feel your pain...more like agony...and can relate.

[The_Necromancer_77]

QUOTE (laughedatbytime @ Jul 26 2011, 08:59 PM)

I absolutely hated high school so I know how you feel. Subdivisions, as poignant as it is, doesn't even begin to explain my experiences. I'm reluctant to advise you to seek alternatives because I think surviving it was necessary for me to go through college and in entering the work world, but there are virtual high schools that you could try if you absolutely can't deal with it. I'm not sure where you're from but you may be able to find something using Google. In any case, good luck in whatever you decide to do...I know it's a bit of a cliche, but I feel your pain...more like agony...and can relate.

That song is really easy to relate to. At least there's RUSH during hard times.

 

I'll definitely look into that. I've thought about it, but I do worry that I might end up slacking. And I understand that high school might help later in life, but I don't plan on going to a regular college, so I'm not too worried about learning about...social stuff.

 

Thank you. It can be so hard.

[HowItIs]

Chiming in here... me too. I hated High School. Never fit in with anyone. I think I had ADD but it wasn't a thing back then (yeah, I'm pretty old). You've been given great advice already so I'll just echo what ioc said; HS in not real life. Hang in there and lean on family and friends. And Rush, of course

[Mara]

I loathed high school with every fiber of my being, so I can relate. And I had a decent core group of friends and was up near the top of my class academically.

 

I remember driving past an elementary school the day before graduation. All the kidlets were out at recess, and I looked at them and thought, "kids, I wouldn't accept any amount of money to be where you are now. You have no idea of the sheer HELL that is in store for you in a few years. Me, I'm done. Haha."

 

But at some point you'll have to deal with "social stuff", unless you're really planning to be a hermit. I definitely recommend getting some professional help, and I'm not anti-medication as long as there's therapy to accompany it. (No, I'm not a doctor, but I think meds can be a great help as a temporary way to "fill the gap" while you learn how to apply the skills you gain from therapy).

 

Good luck, and many hugs.

[nettiesaur]

QUOTE (The_Necromancer_77 @ Jul 26 2011, 09:53 PM)

QUOTE (nettiesaur @ Jul 26 2011, 08:50 PM) QUOTE (The_Necromancer_77 @ Jul 26 2011, 08:37 PM) QUOTE (danielmclark @ Jul 26 2011, 07:23 PM) You're not alone, even if it feels like it. It's cliche, but true: millions of people have been right where you are now. For better or worse (and this might sound a little unhelpful), you're not unique in this situation. It's been done before, and frequently. So, I have two things to add to this. First, see if you can test out. Some school districts in some states will let you test out of high school. Second, you said you have social anxiety. That's a problem if you don't even want to go to a job to get out of the school system you hate so much. That says to me that your anxiety is more of a problem than the school - and probably contributes to your feelings about the school in a circular way. Advice? Talk to a therapist, talk to your parents, talk to TRF'ers, if that'll help. Just talk. And if you do see a professional, resist being put on medication of any kind unless you get a second and third opinion. Too many professionals are too quick to prescribe to kids today. I know. It's nice to know that other people have made it, I guess.   I've never heard of doing the testing thing, so i'm pretty sure you can't do it here. I'd probably bomb it anyway. I get below average scores in science and math.   I've seen a therapist twice before. I really wish they would have prescribed me something, because I know you control your thoughts, but I just can't do it. It's been two-three years now and it just keeps getting worse. Doesn't help that good therapy is expensive (though I know they have options to get it cheaper through insurance etc)   The thing about talking is that I always end up talking my friends' ears off. I end up feeling embarrassed that I'm always leaning on them for help and being sad and a burden. I don't feel close enough with my parents to talk to them.   ahhhh life is so great! Another survivor here. and I'm a teacher now.   It sounds like you need to talk to your parents, even though you don't feel close to them. They probably don't know how you feel, and don't have a clue that you want to do something else, or finish school in a different way and are also depressed. Yup. Parents are not mind readers, and need you to tell them what's wrong, so they can help you! I've talked to my parents about it before, so I'm a little reluctant to bring it up again. My mom seems to be more open to Alternative things, since she took some Alt classes in high school. My dad, although, seems to think alternatives are just for 'dumb' kids and 'stoners'.   I'll try to talk to them soon. I might be able to find out about something. I dunno. All I know is that I don't want to set foot in my high school ever again :x   Thanks for all your support, guys. One thing you might want to check into is your local technical or community college. Some have night high school programs, or "adult high school". They might let you into those classes.   and, what Mara said. You need to deal with the social anxiety stuff.

[Black Thunder]

I know how you feel.

 

I'm going to high school, too. I'm two years away from graduation, and there are moments when I'm tired of living. etc. become extremely depressed, but still, I've managed to get over it many times (I just take a walk, or talk to my best friends). School's not so bad when you look at it from the right perspective.

 

Anyway, good luck to you and be strong!

[Good,bad,andrush]

QUOTE (The_Necromancer_77 @ Jul 26 2011, 09:37 PM)

QUOTE (danielmclark @ Jul 26 2011, 07:23 PM) You're not alone, even if it feels like it. It's cliche, but true: millions of people have been right where you are now. For better or worse (and this might sound a little unhelpful), you're not unique in this situation. It's been done before, and frequently. So, I have two things to add to this. First, see if you can test out. Some school districts in some states will let you test out of high school. Second, you said you have social anxiety. That's a problem if you don't even want to go to a job to get out of the school system you hate so much. That says to me that your anxiety is more of a problem than the school - and probably contributes to your feelings about the school in a circular way. Advice? Talk to a therapist, talk to your parents, talk to TRF'ers, if that'll help. Just talk. And if you do see a professional, resist being put on medication of any kind unless you get a second and third opinion. Too many professionals are too quick to prescribe to kids today. I know. It's nice to know that other people have made it, I guess.   I've never heard of doing the testing thing, so i'm pretty sure you can't do it here. I'd probably bomb it anyway. I get below average scores in science and math.   I've seen a therapist twice before. I really wish they would have prescribed me something, because I know you control your thoughts, but I just can't do it. It's been two-three years now and it just keeps getting worse. Doesn't help that good therapy is expensive (though I know they have options to get it cheaper through insurance etc)   The thing about talking is that I always end up talking my friends' ears off. I end up feeling embarrassed that I'm always leaning on them for help and being sad and a burden. I don't feel close enough with my parents to talk to them.   ahhhh life is so great! I'm gonna be a bit of a dick here, but you need to change your mindset. Not your character or feelings or any of that...you should never change what you want to be. But in this case you just need to change your outlook. I'm a senior this year and I've been the same way all throughout high school. Little to no friends, and a girlfriend who cheated on me with a close friend after a year together, after I wrote her a novel   But look...while I was extremely depressed after this, I laugh at it now...I still hate school, but I love to learn. I love to just learn about every single thing I can. I try to be as humble as i can and as productive as possible. I learned long ago you can't please everyone so you need to stop being afraid and start looking for things to do to make yourself happy.   Ever heard the saying, (and I paraphrase): give a man a fish and feed him for a day, teach a man to fish and feed him forever?   Well, medicine, therapy, even the advice you get here...you can't permanently rely on that. Complaining and venting is also good, but you can't expect it to fix everything. Think about these things as someone giving you a fish...sadly, now you need to learn how to fish, and it seems like one of two things: no one is willing to teach you or you're afraid to learn. High school does not teach you everything, so don't expect to learn how to fish from there...   Hey buddy, find something you enjoy and always come back to that, and always be productive as well...you have to balance work and play, as you balance everything else (think hemisphes ) and when you have found balance and how to control it, you'll be fine. Don't tell yourself that "you can't help it," even though it may really seem like you can't help it.   And don't tell me I don't understand...I know for a fact that you can help yourself, just vet rid of that negative mindset. Or rather, balance it with a positive one.   Good luck, and message me if you need to talk. But try to toughen up in your own too

[doublereeder]

QUOTE (Good,bad,andrush @ Jul 27 2011, 08:12 AM)

QUOTE (The_Necromancer_77 @ Jul 26 2011, 09:37 PM) QUOTE (danielmclark @ Jul 26 2011, 07:23 PM) You're not alone, even if it feels like it. It's cliche, but true: millions of people have been right where you are now. For better or worse (and this might sound a little unhelpful), you're not unique in this situation. It's been done before, and frequently. So, I have two things to add to this. First, see if you can test out. Some school districts in some states will let you test out of high school. Second, you said you have social anxiety. That's a problem if you don't even want to go to a job to get out of the school system you hate so much. That says to me that your anxiety is more of a problem than the school - and probably contributes to your feelings about the school in a circular way. Advice? Talk to a therapist, talk to your parents, talk to TRF'ers, if that'll help. Just talk. And if you do see a professional, resist being put on medication of any kind unless you get a second and third opinion. Too many professionals are too quick to prescribe to kids today. I know. It's nice to know that other people have made it, I guess.   I've never heard of doing the testing thing, so i'm pretty sure you can't do it here. I'd probably bomb it anyway. I get below average scores in science and math.   I've seen a therapist twice before. I really wish they would have prescribed me something, because I know you control your thoughts, but I just can't do it. It's been two-three years now and it just keeps getting worse. Doesn't help that good therapy is expensive (though I know they have options to get it cheaper through insurance etc)   The thing about talking is that I always end up talking my friends' ears off. I end up feeling embarrassed that I'm always leaning on them for help and being sad and a burden. I don't feel close enough with my parents to talk to them.   ahhhh life is so great! I'm gonna be a bit of a dick here, but you need to change your mindset. Not your character or feelings or any of that...you should never change what you want to be. But in this case you just need to change your outlook. I'm a senior this year and I've been the same way all throughout high school. Little to no friends, and a girlfriend who cheated on me with a close friend after a year together, after I wrote her a novel   But look...while I was extremely depressed after this, I laugh at it now...I still hate school, but I love to learn. I love to just learn about every single thing I can. I try to be as humble as i can and as productive as possible. I learned long ago you can't please everyone so you need to stop being afraid and start looking for things to do to make yourself happy.   Ever heard the saying, (and I paraphrase): give a man a fish and feed him for a day, teach a man to fish and feed him forever?   Well, medicine, therapy, even the advice you get here...you can't permanently rely on that. Complaining and venting is also good, but you can't expect it to fix everything. Think about these things as someone giving you a fish...sadly, now you need to learn how to fish, and it seems like one of two things: no one is willing to teach you or you're afraid to learn. High school does not teach you everything, so don't expect to learn how to fish from there...   Hey buddy, find something you enjoy and always come back to that, and always be productive as well...you have to balance work and play, as you balance everything else (think hemisphes ) and when you have found balance and how to control it, you'll be fine. Don't tell yourself that "you can't help it," even though it may really seem like you can't help it.   And don't tell me I don't understand...I know for a fact that you can help yourself, just vet rid of that negative mindset. Or rather, balance it with a positive one.   Good luck, and message me if you need to talk. But try to toughen up in your own too Yeah, high school sucks for a lot of people. It's something you have to go through, just another walk of life. I struggled through freshman year like nobody's business, and I've never had one year of high school that I've enjoyed and said to myself, 'oh, what a great year!' And it's not easier said than done, because everyone has been there, but you really do have to stick it out. You only have two more years, and the last two go by the fastest. You have us here if you want to blow off some steam, and if you want additional help, but you really should talk to your parents (or have your counselor talk to them) again.

[Analog Kelly]

It's been years since I was in high school, but I remember it well- it totally sucked. For everyone who is suffering through it (don't laugh) It does get better. I did well academically, went to college, got a great job and life improved significantly.

 

All the kids who are bullies and assholes grow up to be losers. Keep focused on your grades and just keep looking forward to life AFTER graduation.

[The_Necromancer_77]

Thank you guys. I really think things are better already having lots of people to relate with and talk to.

 

I'm definitely gonna see a therapist and just try to focus on things I love like playing piano and good music

 

Thanks again

[Good,bad,andrush]

QUOTE (The_Necromancer_77 @ Jul 27 2011, 05:11 PM)

Thank you guys. I really think things are better already having lots of people to relate with and talk to. I'm definitely gonna see a therapist and just try to focus on things I love like playing piano and good music Thanks again

Remember, the medicine and stuff helps, but it doesn't teach you how to fish, it just is fish

 

So don't rely on that stuff, and don't go getting yourself into trouble and use whatever problems you have as an excuse. You really do need to just "stick it out."

[CMWriter]

QUOTE (Good,bad,andrush @ Jul 27 2011, 09:29 PM)

QUOTE (The_Necromancer_77 @ Jul 27 2011, 05:11 PM) Thank you guys. I really think things are better already having lots of people to relate with and talk to. I'm definitely gonna see a therapist and just try to focus on things I love like playing piano and good music Thanks again  Remember, the medicine and stuff helps, but it doesn't teach you how to fish, it just is fish   So don't rely on that stuff, and don't go getting yourself into trouble and use whatever problems you have as an excuse. You really do need to just "stick it out." On the contrary, I went through therapy my sophomore-senior years of high school. Saved my grades, saved my GPA, pretty much saved my life. Granted, it was all just talk counseling, no actual "meds", but while it ultimately does come down to the individual, I would never not recommend counseling.   ...But... that aside... I would definitely say yes to focusing on what you do enjoy and not losing sight of the ultimate goal - graduation. My latter two-three years of high school were extremely stressful for me. Yes, I had a close group of friends and liked school in general, but sometimes things just happen, and it's okay to reach out if you just need a (proverbial or literal) shoulder to lean on.   My junior year I went from nearly failing two courses due to the sheer stress of my academic and home lives to getting high B's in them and acing the AP exams in those same courses. I owe that to my counselor.   I say do whatever works. But use your resources. They're there for a reason.

[The_Necromancer_77]

QUOTE (Good,bad,andrush @ Jul 27 2011, 07:29 PM)

QUOTE (The_Necromancer_77 @ Jul 27 2011, 05:11 PM) Thank you guys. I really think things are better already having lots of people to relate with and talk to. I'm definitely gonna see a therapist and just try to focus on things I love like playing piano and good music Thanks again  Remember, the medicine and stuff helps, but it doesn't teach you how to fish, it just is fish   So don't rely on that stuff, and don't go getting yourself into trouble and use whatever problems you have as an excuse. You really do need to just "stick it out." I'll try my best. (also Stick it out ftw)   I'd just like to tell you I love your icon. That's from Brazil, right? Such a great movie.

[Good,bad,andrush]

[The_Necromancer_77]

Edited July 28, 2011 by The_Necromancer_77

[Good,bad,andrush]

Edited July 28, 2011 by Good,bad,andrush

[Good,bad,andrush]

Oh and hey, out of curiosity, are you taking tough classes? They can help, believe it or not...