Silas Lang Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 http://www.teenagerockopera.com/imgs/1974/albums/010_yes_pic.jpg Review in Creem Magazine (May 74) by Alan Niester Tales From Topographic Oceans is a staggering example of what can happen when mortal man is afflicted with the Opus Syndrome, an all too common modern day disease in which the afflicted (usually restricted to musicians, movie makers, political speech writers and the occasional sportscaster) loses all comprehension of the suitable use of time and space. Symptoms of the disease include the following: 1. The overwhelming urge to stretch simplistic, trivial and often downright embarrassing vignettes over as gross a time span as possible. 2. The homogenizing and multi-duplication of each into assembly line type redundancy, with the tangible ultimate being one long line of white noise. 3. A growing and unrealistic sense of self-importance leading to even greater self-indulgence and 4. A total breakdown of all powers of self-criticism. Tales From Topographic Oceans exhibits traces of all these symptoms, and as a result, its creation, assembly and execution have become one great mistake from start to finish. The lyrics are overblown horseshit, and each of the ponderous 81 minutes of music sounds exactly like its predecessor and therefore offers no foundation whatsoever on which the music might build. All told, Tales is as useless a piece of entertainment as was Passion Play, but twice as bad because it's twice as long. The album contains four full-sided compositions, each based on some dumb commie-inspired philosophical tract collectively known as the Shastric Scriptures. Song titles include such zingers as "The Revealing Science of God" (subtitled "Dance of the Dawn") and "The Ancient (Giants under the Sun)". And incidentally, should you attempt to accuse me of being one of those three-minute elitists who won't listen to anything that can't be squeezed in between the end of Cannon and the beginning of Kojak, let me inform you that I liked "Close To The Edge" almost as much as "Your Move" and "Roundabout". The difference between "Close To The Edge" and any one of these four turds is simple: dynamism. "Close To The Edge" had bite, drive, exuberance, nifty time changes and sex appeal. "Ritual (Nous Sommes Du Soleil)" or any of the others from T.T.O. merely has stomach flu. It's repetitive, lifeless, and as close to plasticized codeine as you're ever likely to hear. Exactly why this excessive doggerel was loosed on the public is hard to fathom, but methinks a clue might be found in this excerpt from the liner notes, written by Jon Anderson. "It (the recording of the album) was a magical experience which left both of us (meaning Anderson and Steve Howe) exhilarated for days. Chris, Rick and Alan also made very important contributions of their own..." What that probably translates to is that T.T.O. is in fact a great Anderson/Howe powerplay, with Squire, Wakeman and White merely along for the royalties. And as soon as that kind of shit hits the fan, it's usually the fan that gets hit with the shit. It's having to listen to offscourings like this that makes reviewing records occasionally work, not fun. The only reason you should have this album is to frame the cover. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treeduck Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 I like Topographic Oceans but for me it's the weakest of the first 7 albums...that's not a knock on it really, it's just that the others are better... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReRushed Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 So, he didn't like it, right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony R Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 I like that review. I first heard that album in early 74, I was nearly 13 at the time. I hated it, still do, but I remember my mate's brother who was 4 or 5 years older than us saying that we were too immature to appreciate it. I realise now what I missed at the time; he was a pretentious wanker and this album was the beginning of the end for Yes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rushman14 Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 This is where the reviewer loses all credibility and just proves himself to be another a-hole with an opinion. "All told, Tales is as useless a piece of entertainment as was Passion Play, but twice as bad because it's twice as long." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony R Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 QUOTE (Rushman14 @ Apr 5 2011, 10:32 PM) This is where the reviewer loses all credibility and just proves himself to be another a-hole with an opinion. "All told, Tales is as useless a piece of entertainment as was Passion Play, but twice as bad because it's twice as long." Yeah you are correct. Passion Play is as bad as TFTO, and is also way too long. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In A Tidewater Surge Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 This is my favorite Yes album Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rushgoober Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 QUOTE (In A Tidewater Surge @ Apr 5 2011, 02:51 PM) This is my favorite Yes album Mine too! I couldn't even finish the review it was such a bummer. One of the best 15 albums of all time by anyone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RUSHHEAD666 Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 QUOTE (Tony R @ Apr 5 2011, 02:24 PM) I like that review. I first heard that album in early 74, I was nearly 13 at the time. I hated it, still do, but I remember my mate's brother who was 4 or 5 years older than us saying that we were too immature to appreciate it. I realise now what I missed at the time; he was a pretentious wanker and this album was the beginning of the end for Yes. I was like 16 years old when I heard this record. I hated it too at first. I remember playing "Topographic Oceans" in my room when my parents and brother were decorating the Christmas tree. My dad told me to turn that annoying crap off and come help put up some ornaments. I still think it's a very difficult album to get into but I do enjoy it now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rushman14 Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 QUOTE (Tony R @ Apr 5 2011, 02:49 PM) QUOTE (Rushman14 @ Apr 5 2011, 10:32 PM) This is where the reviewer loses all credibility and just proves himself to be another a-hole with an opinion. "All told, Tales is as useless a piece of entertainment as was Passion Play, but twice as bad because it's twice as long." Yeah you are correct. Passion Play is as bad as TFTO, and is also way too long. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silas Lang Posted April 5, 2011 Author Share Posted April 5, 2011 (edited) QUOTE (RUSHHEAD666 @ Apr 5 2011, 05:13 PM)QUOTE (Tony R @ Apr 5 2011, 02:24 PM) I like that review. I first heard that album in early 74, I was nearly 13 at the time. I hated it, still do, but I remember my mate's brother who was 4 or 5 years older than us saying that we were too immature to appreciate it. I realise now what I missed at the time; he was a pretentious wanker and this album was the beginning of the end for Yes. I was like 16 years old when I heard this record. I hated it too at first. I remember playing "Topographic Oceans" in my room when my parents and brother were decorating the Christmas tree. My dad told me to turn that annoying crap off and come help put up some ornaments. I still think it's a very difficult album to get into but I do enjoy it now. I was in my early teens as well the first time I heard it and ddn't get into it very much. It took years and years before I was finally able to enjoy it a lot as I do now. It's certainly flawed though. It's an album that's virtually impossible for anyone to like immediately I think. I definitely like A Passion Play more. Edited April 5, 2011 by Silas Lang Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rushman14 Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 QUOTE (RUSHHEAD666 @ Apr 5 2011, 03:13 PM) QUOTE (Tony R @ Apr 5 2011, 02:24 PM) I like that review. I first heard that album in early 74, I was nearly 13 at the time. I hated it, still do, but I remember my mate's brother who was 4 or 5 years older than us saying that we were too immature to appreciate it. I realise now what I missed at the time; he was a pretentious wanker and this album was the beginning of the end for Yes. I was like 16 years old when I heard this record. I hated it too at first. I remember playing "Topographic Oceans" in my room when my parents and brother were decorating the Christmas tree. My dad told me to turn that annoying crap off and come help put up some ornaments. I still think it's a very difficult album to get into but I do enjoy it now. It took me a long time to get into it as well. I finally had to force myself to sit through it a few times before it started clicking with me. I now love it but still find it a bit overlong (The Ancient) which is why it falls short of being a masterpiece. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rushgoober Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 Count me as another who it took years to appreciate Tales. Hell, it took me years to appreciate Yes in general, but it's one of those albums for me, like Trout Mask Replica, that I'm SOOOO glad I persevered with. I still remember the first time I could listen to all of Tales in one sitting. The thing is total genius. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rushman14 Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 QUOTE (Rushman14 @ Apr 5 2011, 03:15 PM) QUOTE (Tony R @ Apr 5 2011, 02:49 PM) QUOTE (Rushman14 @ Apr 5 2011, 10:32 PM) This is where the reviewer loses all credibility and just proves himself to be another a-hole with an opinion. "All told, Tales is as useless a piece of entertainment as was Passion Play, but twice as bad because it's twice as long." Yeah you are correct. Passion Play is as bad as TFTO, and is also way too long. now i need to go back to the "what pissed you off today" thread. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RUSHHEAD666 Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 QUOTE (Rushman14 @ Apr 5 2011, 03:15 PM) QUOTE (Tony R @ Apr 5 2011, 02:49 PM) QUOTE (Rushman14 @ Apr 5 2011, 10:32 PM) This is where the reviewer loses all credibility and just proves himself to be another a-hole with an opinion. "All told, Tales is as useless a piece of entertainment as was Passion Play, but twice as bad because it's twice as long." Yeah you are correct. Passion Play is as bad as TFTO, and is also way too long. Haha! No need to be pissed about that comment. "Passion Play" is a great record. "The Hare Who Lost His Spectacles!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RUSHHEAD666 Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 QUOTE (rushgoober @ Apr 5 2011, 03:23 PM) Count me as another who it took years to appreciate Tales. Hell, it took me years to appreciate Yes in general, but it's one of those albums for me, like Trout Mask Replica, that I'm SOOOO glad I persevered with. I still remember the first time I could listen to all of Tales in one sitting. The thing is total genius. Yeah Gary, I agree. It took me a long time to get into certain Yes albums. I still have a hard time loving "Relayer." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rushgoober Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 QUOTE (RUSHHEAD666 @ Apr 5 2011, 03:30 PM) QUOTE (rushgoober @ Apr 5 2011, 03:23 PM) Count me as another who it took years to appreciate Tales. Hell, it took me years to appreciate Yes in general, but it's one of those albums for me, like Trout Mask Replica, that I'm SOOOO glad I persevered with. I still remember the first time I could listen to all of Tales in one sitting. The thing is total genius. Yeah Gary, I agree. It took me a long time to get into certain Yes albums. I still have a hard time loving "Relayer." Relayer took longer for me than Tales. Now I love it, but for a long time it sounded too atonal and noisy to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treeduck Posted April 6, 2011 Share Posted April 6, 2011 QUOTE (Tony R @ Apr 5 2011, 04:49 PM) QUOTE (Rushman14 @ Apr 5 2011, 10:32 PM) This is where the reviewer loses all credibility and just proves himself to be another a-hole with an opinion. "All told, Tales is as useless a piece of entertainment as was Passion Play, but twice as bad because it's twice as long." Yeah you are correct. Passion Play is as bad as TFTO, and is also way too long. A Passion Play is a good album, and it rocks hard you little bitch!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rushman14 Posted April 6, 2011 Share Posted April 6, 2011 QUOTE (treeduck @ Apr 5 2011, 05:26 PM) QUOTE (Tony R @ Apr 5 2011, 04:49 PM) QUOTE (Rushman14 @ Apr 5 2011, 10:32 PM) This is where the reviewer loses all credibility and just proves himself to be another a-hole with an opinion. "All told, Tales is as useless a piece of entertainment as was Passion Play, but twice as bad because it's twice as long." Yeah you are correct. Passion Play is as bad as TFTO, and is also way too long. A Passion Play is a good album, and it rocks hard you little bitch!!! aye! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treeduck Posted April 6, 2011 Share Posted April 6, 2011 QUOTE (Rushman14 @ Apr 5 2011, 07:41 PM) QUOTE (treeduck @ Apr 5 2011, 05:26 PM) QUOTE (Tony R @ Apr 5 2011, 04:49 PM) QUOTE (Rushman14 @ Apr 5 2011, 10:32 PM) This is where the reviewer loses all credibility and just proves himself to be another a-hole with an opinion. "All told, Tales is as useless a piece of entertainment as was Passion Play, but twice as bad because it's twice as long." Yeah you are correct. Passion Play is as bad as TFTO, and is also way too long. A Passion Play is a good album, and it rocks hard you little bitch!!! aye! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rushgoober Posted April 6, 2011 Share Posted April 6, 2011 QUOTE (RUSHHEAD666 @ Apr 5 2011, 03:29 PM) QUOTE (Rushman14 @ Apr 5 2011, 03:15 PM) QUOTE (Tony R @ Apr 5 2011, 02:49 PM) QUOTE (Rushman14 @ Apr 5 2011, 10:32 PM) This is where the reviewer loses all credibility and just proves himself to be another a-hole with an opinion. "All told, Tales is as useless a piece of entertainment as was Passion Play, but twice as bad because it's twice as long." Yeah you are correct. Passion Play is as bad as TFTO, and is also way too long. Haha! No need to be pissed about that comment. "Passion Play" is a great record. "The Hare Who Lost His Spectacles!" I think The Hare Who Lost His Spectacles ruins what would have otherwise been a fine album. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treeduck Posted April 6, 2011 Share Posted April 6, 2011 QUOTE (rushgoober @ Apr 5 2011, 07:57 PM) QUOTE (RUSHHEAD666 @ Apr 5 2011, 03:29 PM) QUOTE (Rushman14 @ Apr 5 2011, 03:15 PM) QUOTE (Tony R @ Apr 5 2011, 02:49 PM) QUOTE (Rushman14 @ Apr 5 2011, 10:32 PM) This is where the reviewer loses all credibility and just proves himself to be another a-hole with an opinion. "All told, Tales is as useless a piece of entertainment as was Passion Play, but twice as bad because it's twice as long." Yeah you are correct. Passion Play is as bad as TFTO, and is also way too long. Haha! No need to be pissed about that comment. "Passion Play" is a great record. "The Hare Who Lost His Spectacles!" I think The Hare Who Lost His Spectacles ruins what would have otherwise been a fine album. Put your newly acquired ear plugs in during that section Goobs... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bastille Dave Posted April 6, 2011 Share Posted April 6, 2011 I just found the LP of this album a week ago. I've never heard it before all the way through so I guess I'll give it a spin soon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bastille Dave Posted April 6, 2011 Share Posted April 6, 2011 I just found the LP of this album a week ago. I've never heard it before all the way through so I guess I'll give it a spin soon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Good,bad,andrush Posted April 6, 2011 Share Posted April 6, 2011 I like it a lot But ctte and the yes album and relayer are better for me. But tales is beast. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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