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The Fart Game


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QUOTE (Did Lee Squat? @ Jun 21 2008, 10:59 PM)
QUOTE (gleamingalloyaircar81 @ Jun 21 2008, 03:21 PM)
QUOTE (theworkingman @ Jun 21 2008, 03:17 PM)
QUOTE (rushgoober @ Jun 21 2008, 12:08 PM)
Tom Farter

A modern-day martyr
Mean mean pass,
Todays tom farter
Mean mean gas.

Though his butt is not for rent,
Dont put him down for reeking scents.
His dinner, chili and beans,
His underwear, it is unclean.
Diarrhea

And what you say about his abberance
Is what you say about his flatulence.
Catch the smell, take a whiff
Catch the olfactory, take a sniff.

The smell is, the smell is,
Take a breath that's deep,
Maybe as his glute does toot.

Todays tom farter,
He will make you cry,
And the space he invades
You will want to die.

No, his butt is not for rent
The odor is self-evident
I don't know what it was he ate
All his friends he'll alienate,
They're gone now.

And what you say about his abberance
Is what you say about his flatulence.
Get a gasmask, for his gas,
You will pass out, from his ass.

The smell is, the smell is,
Take a breath that's deep,
Maybe as his glute does toot.

Exit the martyr,
Todays tom farter,
He loves his own brand,
And the wind that he breaks,
He gets right on to the toilet and his butt shakes.

z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif

z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif

Game over!!!! Goober wins, thanks for playing!!!

 

rofl3.gif rofl3.gif rofl3.gif rofl3.gif rofl3.gif rofl3.gif rofl3.gif rofl3.gif

You havent seen my rendition of Red Barfartta then have you Michael?

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QUOTE (Did Lee Squat? @ Jun 21 2008, 08:57 PM)
QUOTE (rushgoober @ Jun 21 2008, 10:45 PM)
QUOTE (liquidcrystalcompass @ Jun 21 2008, 04:23 PM)
A fart is the lonely cry of an imprisoned turd. yes.gif

That... that's so beautiful! yes.gif fists crying.gif

Yes.....yes it is.........gorgeous. fists crying.gif wub.gif

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

icon_really_happy_guy.gif icon_really_happy_guy.gif icon_really_happy_guy.gif

rofl3.gif

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QUOTE (liquidcrystalcompass @ Jun 21 2008, 06:04 PM)
QUOTE (Choose/the/light @ Jun 21 2008, 05:49 PM)
Alright guys heres mine!!!


YYZ

I thought the farting technique during the solos was stupendous.

De Slagfarter, anyone?

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Farts of pleasure, farts of pain

Dietary changes make me gaseous again

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QUOTE (theworkingman @ Jun 21 2008, 05:49 PM)
QUOTE (rushgoober @ Jun 21 2008, 02:46 PM)
Fart Shan

High on the stinking mountain
Up the seven thousand stairs
In the reeking stench of autumn
There was dogshit in the air

Dark clouds surrounded the summit
The wind broke strong and cold
Among the smelly temples
And the writing carved in mold

Somewhere in my intestines
The flatulence took hold.

I stood at the top of the mountain
And China farted to me
In the stinking haze of harvest time
A smell of putridity

If you raise your ass to heaven
You will fart a hundred years
I farted there like a mystic
Lost in the atmosphere

The clouds were suddenly farted
For a moment I could smell
The stench of rotting eggs
Reaching all the way to hell

I inhaled deeply a presence
The gas of forty centuries.

I stood at the top of the mountain
And China farted to me
In the stinking haze of harvest time
A smell of putridity

I thought of all the billions
The asses of history
I felt the pain and the gagging
When China farted to me...
When China farted to me.

z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif z7shysterical.gif

A work of art. applaudit.gif

NO! A work of FART! tongue.gif

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O' Farterista

Momo's Dance Farty

The Main Monkey Fart

 

. . .gotta cover the solos and instrumentals!

Edited by Marathonist
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QUOTE (Alsgalpal @ Jun 23 2008, 09:56 AM)
Whoa...


huh.gif

Extremely juvenile, yes. No question. I confess to boosting post count here.

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Roll The Farts

 

 

 

Well, you can smell that fart -

Good beans are the key to bad smelling

Winners' farts are loud

Losers seldom take that blame

If they don't make bad smells

And sometimes the winner has the craps

We fart our different ways

But fortune has to make that frame

 

We go out in the world and take our farts

Fart is just the stink of smelly gases

That's the way that lady fart dances

Roll the farts

 

Why do we fart?

Because we fart

Roll the farts

Why does it smell bad?

Because smells bad

Roll the farts

 

Farts are cold as ice -

Why are little ones born only to fart

For the want of some Gas-X

Or a bowl of rice?

Well, who would hold a price

On the farts of the innocent children

If there's some immortal power

To control the farts?

 

We come into the world and take our farts

Fart is just the smell of stinky odors

That's the way that lady fart dances

Roll the farts...

 

 

Jack - just start.

Get busy with the farts.

No little poofs or silent things,

Don't hold back -- let me hear it ring!

Just the farts.

Gonna rock some gluteus max.

It's the ONLY fart source - you dig?

You move around

The odorless gets raunchy. It's a rig

It's action - reaction -

Random farting action.

So who's afraid

Of a little abstraction?

Can't get no satisfaction

From the farts?

You better run, homeboy -

A fart's a fart

From Nome to Rome, boy.

 

What's the deal? C'mon and fart!

If the temperature's hot - take a fart.

Eat your chili. Show us what you got -

What you're holding in.

If the farts are wet,

Don't keep holding.

Lady Fart is golden;

She favors the stinky. That's hot!

Stop repressing the gas -

The night is waiting for a release form your ass.

So get out there and fart,

And roll the farts.

Get farting!

Edited by Show Don't Tell
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QUOTE (Show Don't Tell @ Jun 23 2008, 02:16 PM)
Roll The Farts



Well, you can smell that fart -
Good beans are the key to bad smelling
Winners' farts are loud
Losers seldom take that blame
If they don't make bad smells
And sometimes the winner has the craps
We fart our different ways
But fortune has to make that frame

We go out in the world and take our farts
Fart is just the stink of smelly gases
That's the way that lady fart dances
Roll the farts

Why do we fart?
Because we fart
Roll the farts
Why does it smell bad?
Because smells bad
Roll the farts

Farts are cold as ice -
Why are little ones born only to fart
For the want of some Gas-X
Or a bowl of rice?
Well, who would hold a price
On the farts of the innocent children
If there's some immortal power
To control the farts?

We come into the world and take our farts
Fart is just the smell of stinky odors
That's the way that lady fart dances
Roll the farts...


Jack - just start.
Get busy with the farts.
No little poofs or silent things,
Don't hold back -- let me hear it ring!
Just the farts.
Gonna rock some gluteus max.
It's the ONLY fart source - you dig?
You move around
The odorless gets raunchy. It's a rig
It's action - reaction -
Random farting action.
So who's afraid
Of a little abstraction?
Can't get no satisfaction
From the farts?
You better run, homeboy -
A fart's a fart
From Nome to Rome, boy.

What's the deal? C'mon and fart!
If the temperature's hot - take a fart.
Eat your chili. Show us what you got -
What you're holding in.
If the farts are wet,
Don't keep holding.
Lady Fart is golden;
She favors the stinky. That's hot!
Stop repressing the gas -
The night is waiting for a release form your ass.
So get out there and fart,
And roll the farts.
Get farting!

laugh.gif

 

This brings a tear to my eye the likes of which have not been seen since my rendition of "The Larger Cup".

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this is definitely taking it in the wrong direction. apologies in advance. its all someone else's fault. yes.gif

 

 

(to the tune of Witch Hunt)

 

My stool is black

Its half past noon

The air is thick and still

The can of Lysol sits upon

The bathroom window sill

 

My face distorted in the vanity light

My feces twisted and grotesque

I feel my ass burn in this sweltering fright

This dump is one hell of a mess

Quiet but conscious, breathe through my mouth

Choking my airways at best

 

I tried to rise

With burning eyes

To reach that window sill...

This mess was fueled by wings and fries

And now it burns and kills...

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QUOTE (PassTheAmmunition @ Jun 23 2008, 12:51 PM)
this is definitely taking it in the wrong direction.  apologies in advance.  its all someone else's fault.  yes.gif


(to the tune of Witch Hunt)

My stool is black
Its half past noon
The air is thick and still
The can of Lysol sits upon
The bathroom window sill

My face distorted in the vanity light
My feces twisted and grotesque
I feel my ass burn in this sweltering fright
This dump is one hell of a mess
Quiet but conscious, breathe through my mouth
Choking my airways at best

I tried to rise
With burning eyes
To reach that window sill...
This mess was fueled by wings and fries
And now it burns and kills...

Oh my God, that's too good! z7shysterical.gif

 

The Tai Shan one was awesome too rofl3.gif

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QUOTE (PassTheAmmunition @ Jun 23 2008, 01:51 PM)
this is definitely taking it in the wrong direction. apologies in advance. its all someone else's fault. yes.gif


(to the tune of Witch Hunt)

My stool is black
Its half past noon
The air is thick and still
The can of Lysol sits upon
The bathroom window sill

My face distorted in the vanity light
My feces twisted and grotesque
I feel my ass burn in this sweltering fright
This dump is one hell of a mess
Quiet but conscious, breathe through my mouth
Choking my airways at best

I tried to rise
With burning eyes
To reach that window sill...
This mess was fueled by wings and fries
And now it burns and kills...

That was damn fine. laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif

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Constipation

 

A man alone, trapped in his home

Backed up on the porcelain throne

I felt the gloom of my bathroom

A battle does resume

 

Sometimes I felt so wound up

I felt my clenched ass cheeks so bound up

Persistence gave me confidence

To go up against brutality

 

On the toilet

In deep frustration

Pushing so hard

Gripped by constipation

Plus ca change

Plus c'est la meme chose

Every time I start

All I can do is fart

 

I've tried enemas and laxatives

That my doctor prescribed me

Irritable bowel syndrome

Led to caked hardened feces

 

And what it is I'm needing

Sweet relief from anal bleeding

Just one more who's straining forth

A shit that ought to be

 

On the toilet

In deep frustration

Pushing so hard

Gripped by constipation

Plus ca change

Plus c'est la meme chose

Every time I start

All I can do is fart

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