Lorraine

Just such a beautiful time of the year. I am determined to not let this cancer ruin what might be my last one. Tomorrow if I have the energy I am going to the thrift stores to see if I can buy seasonal decorations. I need a small toaster over too. The last one I had was conveniently put to the side when we moved here and I was told I no longer needed it.

More of those from me also. :hug2: :hug2: :hug2: :hug2: :hug2: Yeah! Oooo, a group hug!! !!! Put me in the middle, but don't smother me!!! :) Hang in there. Sending happy thoughts. I could use loads of those right now. It was such a long day with so much going on. Haven't had one of those in the looooongest time! :)

Why wasn't it added? It's a good album.

Road trip! Where to? We'll have to flip some coins. Good thing for modern tech because maps cost money.

His father had a better voice. Tim sang like velvet because the drugs took care of that. I can't listen to Jeff. Something very depressing about his tone. Not saying that's how he is, but how he sounds to me.

I get a 5.9% (yes, :yes: you read that right :yes: 5.9% :o :o :o ) increase in my social security benefits in 2022! Who wants to help me spend it and where do we start?

Props to this. I think I want to be aware when I am checking out as well. That's why I'm so grateful for the Hemp oil. My father remains lucid with focus. The Morphine was dulling things. From the many accounts and reviews of Hemp oil, this quality to remain focuse d is widesread. If that is true, all the more reason to check it out. I may wind up hating it, but it is worth trying it out. Please feel free, anyone, to pm me details. Nurse was here for 2 hours. Morphine upped substantially as well as Ativans. Left me with good supply of enemas, suppositories, laxatives and aloe Vera wipes so I don't get too irritated. Also threw out my aluminum free deodorant . You know, the one that they say causes breast cancer? At this point, who cares? Right? :huh: Thanks for keeping us updated! Daily hug.... :hug2: It's that daily hug that keeps me going. :hug2: :blush: Well then... :hug2: :hug2: :hug2: Were you aware you now owe me four hugs? ;) My deepest apologies. I'm embarrassed to admit that I let a dispute with someone in SOCN keep me from wanting to post at TRF or even visit. That pales in comparison to what you're going through and I promise, if it is physically possible, that I won't skip out on posting in this thread again until you're in a better place. Hoping these hugs make up for my absence. :hug2: :hug2: :hug2: :hug2: :hug2: :hug2: :hug2: :hug2: :hug2: Oh please don't do that I need every bit of support that is provided me here. If you only knew. It's not the physical so much as the mental, and its not like you dwell on it all the time, because I am not. I am limited as to what I can do. I can't read. My eyes just can't handle it anymore. The morphine makes me sleepy. Even without it, my eyes close after reading a few paragraphs I still can't believe this is happening to me. I had such hope the operation would be a grand success instead of unleashing the worst. So keep the prayers and hugs coming. I beg you.

Good because I could never listen to them again unless I wanted to torture myself emotional self,,and it has taken a beating prety bad that last few months. What would would do is go into a Catholic Church and light a candle for me in front of either Our Lady or St Joseph or splurge and do both!!! :) The hardest weeks/months are advancing on me One day at a time. One moment at a time is all I can promise.

The cupcake looks good. I thought you were much younger. Whatever age you are, it is younger now and always will be younger than me.

Hospice nurse comes again first thing in AM. She thinks the extended morphine dosage has to be increased. I agree. I told someone today that I think it will turn out that I am doing well on a Monday and be dead on Friday. She looked at me oddly, and then said that it often happens like that with colon cancer patients. Have a possible buyer for my car too. I understand that, like everything else, I will probably get more than it is worth because good used cars are hard to find. If that is the case, I will look into an inexpensive embalming. As my funeral package stands today, I can be kept safely up to three days in he fridge without any stinky stench. Add to list of things to do tomorrow: call funeral parlor. A lot if getting finalized, that it another reason why I don't think the end is far off. Pray for me please.

That's really beautiful. I'm assuming you took these pictures yourself? I took some last minute ones on the dying vines. Some of them came out very nice. I've been busy drying out the seeds and give them to others who live here, and to just some friends who might want to plant a sunflower for me next Spring. All the flower pictures I post are taken by either myself or my husband in our pollinator gardens, which we like to plant up in all the awkward parts of our property that aren't suitable for veg gardens or more formal landscaping. Growing pollinator-friendly plants has become an important and meaningful part of my year. I didn't get many sunflowers this year but here are some good ones from a few years ago: %20https%3A//live.staticflickr.com/65535/51597835371_b5559926d9_o_d.jpg %20https%3A//live.staticflickr.com/8523/29811119662_43282d471c_o_d.jpg I have already planned a space for sunflowers next year for you :hug2: Is it possible for me to send you the seeds from my sunflowers? The thought came to me today that you might like to plant them. Only questions are: will they think we are sending contraband drugs via the usps and, if not, what would be the best way to pack them up for you? I know they are going to ask what's in the package. Maybe my age is an asset as I smile sweetly and say, "Sunflower seeds!! from my garden for my friend to plant in her garden" What do you think? Lorraine, I have sent seeds through the mail many times, so I wouldn’t think it would be a problem. If you want to send me some and are comfortable with it, I’d welcome them! Either way, there will definitely be sunflowers at my house :hug2: Tell me how best to send them and I will do it. The worst that can happen is that the feds will descend upon this place to arrest a woman dying from cancer for sending sunflower seeds to a friend.

Pain has actually gotten worse since increase in morphine. Today was especially bad. Back to where it was before the operation. Yesterday I had a good day with a great appetite. Today I hardly ate anything. I was going to cancel my hospice chaplain visit, because the priest in yesterday's sermon, believe it or not, touched on most of my difficulties, and I wasn't feeling good at all. Very nauseous and tired. All I had to eat was an english muffin for breakfast and an apple and peanut butter for lunch. Some pretzels and a small bowl of butterscotch pudding with granola and raisins. But she came anyway for about a half hour and we had a few good laughs. She didn't look herself either. Looked like she had something on her mind, but it is not my place to pry. Now I am going to bed. I get about thirty minutes to do three hours of things and it just doesn't work out. As I've said, the only joy I've always had - reading - has also been taken from me because I can't keep my eyes open long enough to read past a few paragaphs

Props to this. I think I want to be aware when I am checking out as well. That's why I'm so grateful for the Hemp oil. My father remains lucid with focus. The Morphine was dulling things. From the many accounts and reviews of Hemp oil, this quality to remain focuse d is widesread. If that is true, all the more reason to check it out. I may wind up hating it, but it is worth trying it out. Please feel free, anyone, to pm me details. Nurse was here for 2 hours. Morphine upped substantially as well as Ativans. Left me with good supply of enemas, suppositories, laxatives and aloe Vera wipes so I don't get too irritated. Also threw out my aluminum free deodorant . You know, the one that they say causes breast cancer? At this point, who cares? Right? :huh: Thanks for keeping us updated! Daily hug.... :hug2: It's that daily hug that keeps me going. :hug2: :blush: Well then... :hug2: :hug2: :hug2: Were you aware you now owe me four hugs? ;)

:hug2:

That's gorgeous. Those butterflies are beautiful. They're so big.

My first thought was that song by Supertramp :musicnote: Yeah, come along too, ding Betty Louoooo... :musicnote: but that's not who you are talking about. I do now know Colin Powell is though. :)

The sunshine and gentle breeze; the birds in their bath; the sound of the fallen leaves. The goodness of so many people. Smile at someone who looks as if they can't take another moment - see the change that comesiver their face. A genuine from the heart smile makes a difference.

Love the bee action photos. Everyone keeps telling me what a swell camera my phone is supposed to have, but without a swell photographer, the swell camera is kind of useless

I never knew this would happen to me, but that's why I chose a packet of them to plant when we moved in at the end of April. They required no garden expert to do it. Just dig small hole and shove in seeds and water a lot. Then one day, about two weeks later, these little green shoots started sprouting out of the ground. They grew very fast It as exciting waiting for the fist one to bloom. The bees and hummingbirds loved them. They are bright and sunny and a joy to look at.

That's really beautiful. I'm assuming you took these pictures yourself? I took some last minute ones on the dying vines. Some of them came out very nice. I've been busy drying out the seeds and give them to others who live here, and to just some friends who might want to plant a sunflower for me next Spring. All the flower pictures I post are taken by either myself or my husband in our pollinator gardens, which we like to plant up in all the awkward parts of our property that aren't suitable for veg gardens or more formal landscaping. Growing pollinator-friendly plants has become an important and meaningful part of my year. I didn't get many sunflowers this year but here are some good ones from a few years ago: %20https%3A//live.staticflickr.com/65535/51597835371_b5559926d9_o_d.jpg %20https%3A//live.staticflickr.com/8523/29811119662_43282d471c_o_d.jpg I have already planned a space for sunflowers next year for you :hug2: Is it possible for me to send you the seeds from my sunflowers? The thought came to me today that you might like to plant them. Only questions are: will they think we are sending contraband drugs via the usps and, if not, what would be the best way to pack them up for you? I know they are going to ask what's in the package. Maybe my age is an asset as I smile sweetly and say, "Sunflower seeds!! from my garden for my friend to plant in her garden" What do you think?

Glad to report that the above floral arrangement still looks as great today as it did a few days ago when it arrived. :) :ebert: :hug2:

That's really beautiful. I'm assuming you took these pictures yourself? I took some last minute ones on the dying vines. Some of them came out very nice. I've been busy drying out the seeds and give them to others who live here, and to just some friends who might want to plant a sunflower for me next Spring.

Props to this. I think I want to be aware when I am checking out as well. That's why I'm so grateful for the Hemp oil. My father remains lucid with focus. The Morphine was dulling things. From the many accounts and reviews of Hemp oil, this quality to remain focuse d is widesread. If that is true, all the more reason to check it out. I may wind up hating it, but it is worth trying it out. Please feel free, anyone, to pm me details. Nurse was here for 2 hours. Morphine upped substantially as well as Ativans. Left me with good supply of enemas, suppositories, laxatives and aloe Vera wipes so I don't get too irritated. Also threw out my aluminum free deodorant . You know, the one that they say causes breast cancer? At this point, who cares? Right? :huh: Thanks for keeping us updated! Daily hug.... :hug2: It's that daily hug that keeps me going. :hug2:

Not....sure...what to do with...this.... :scared: But if it brings you relief, then :clap: :clap: :clap: :) I never had to take one before, but the feces are backing up. I take 11 lax a day and after three days still no relief. That's where the suppository comes in. Got some enemas too. :) They've changed a lot since I was a little girl. :codger: Isn't my life exciting? As long as I'm not in pain and I can still find some humor in this nightmare somewhere, I am not doing too shabby.

:) Daily :hug2: They still look beautiful. She did a lively job on them. Thanks again to you-know-who ;) ;)