LyndseyG, on 10 April 2014 - 05:10 AM, said:
As for the parent thing I think you guys make a good point.
My mum used to be.... An angry person. She never drank or beat us up. She used to smack us if we were naughty but apart from that, she'd just shout or scream. She had this certain tone of voice she used when she was REALLY pissed. It would terrify the crap outta me.
My dad was more reserved. He had a way that was very calming to my mum. He was her support and her rock.
He passed away 20 years ago in May. She's been on anti depressants ever since. She's totally different person now. Much more laid back and carefree. She admitted to me once that "I used to be a cow back then."
There's many, many things but the 2 really big ones that I can think of right now...
I've mentioned before about a very best friend who did a 180 degree turn on me and threatened me with violence. It's on another thread. When I got home and told my mum what happened her response was "Well? What do you expect me to do about it? If I go down to the school and have a rant about it they'll beat you up as soon as I turn away!" I didn't care about being beaten up, it would've shown she cared enough to try.
The second time was when my sister came out. I wasn't there for the fight, sis told me after. Apparently it was epic. It was ironic really as both my parents guessed years ago that she might be gay.
But my experiences of my childhood aren't as bad as other peoples.
Ahh, my mother drinks a lot, and is self-absorbed. And my dad is just self-absorbed.
My sister came out, too- to my mother, over the phone, at 3:00 AM on the night before I got married. (How's that for timing?) But she only had one relationship with a woman, for about a year and a half. And then she went back to men. But she never had a whole lot of success there, either. She died about five and a half years ago, from a combination of pills and alcohol- not an intentional overdose, but just enough was in her system to stop her heart. It really threw me; she and I were soulmates.
Oh, and I'm an alcoholic, but recovered.
Mmmm, life is grand, innit!?