I cried last Friday when I found out, and I've briefly teared up a number of times since then. The reasons, I think, are many, but first and foremost, as others have mentioned, it's the cruel irony of him leaving a wife and young daughter behind after all he'd gone though. It's guilt at having expected the band to keep going for my own pleasure, knowing that he could've been at home enjoying time with his family instead. It's regret that it's really, truly over, and that the world lost such a remarkable talent. It's grief at the passing of an incredible human being who deserved to have a much longer life. All of these things together just coalesce into a huge wave of sadness that washes over me. It shouldn't have ended this way.