TRF Prediction Thread and Roast: Rushgoober's 30,000th post

**H. P. L.** · January 28, 2014

The Yukon Blade Grinder Europe

Ralph Brown: "My character in Radio Rock is totally based on Goober"

http://www.hotflick.net/flicks/2009_The_Boat_That_Rocked/tn300/009BTR_Ralph_Brown_002.jpg

Slow days here in YBG Central? No way: even when the mighty YBG Men are still prowling the world, looking for clues on Captain LeComte and the dastardly Black Dwarf, we can always sip tea and find more about this Goober character whose fate, probably, still hangs from the beak of a giant owl in Toronto (New Readers alert: skip back some pages to make sense of the previous statement, or keep on reading and pretend you smoked a good one).

Case in point, I'm in London sharing a sunny winter afternoon with actor Ralph Brown, probably not the first movie star that would cross your mind, but still a man of considerable talent and experience, having starred in pivotal movies such as SW Episode I, Alien 3, Wayne's World 2.

But we are here to talk about his crowning achievement, at least as far as this reporter is concerned: the portrait of pot-brain DJ Bob, "The Dawn Treader", in the classic British comedy "Radio Rock" (or if you prefer "The Boat that Rocked").

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/it/5/51/ILoveRadioRock-2009.png

The cast of Radio Rock. Goober Brown second left.

"Yeah, we had Goober on as producer for a little while!" quips Brown with British nonchalance.

You what? I ask.

"Well, when I started working on my character, Bob, some friend from Canada called me and said: you gotta listen to Goober's radio show. That's all you need! The next day, the same friend dropped all the podcasts of this Interdimensional Vortex stuff in my mailbox. So I took to listen, and after a while I called the movie producers and said: you know guys, this Goober bloke might provide a valuable asset.

"So after some weeks, we were on the set and one day this dwarf walks in, come straight to me and says: you are all wrong! I still hadn't perfected the look of Bob, we were still trying stuff with the hairdressers and the glasses, but I have to admit that Goober's insight proved spot on. Without him, Bob would have turned out pretty lame, instead it became such an iconic character, even given the limited time screen I ended up having."

http://focusfeaturesmedia.com/uploads/image/mediafile/1258488703-814209a1c06da6245e20765b27e3567c/250.jpg

"Day after day, I started copying Goober's way and bring it all into Bob, you know what I mean? Even the staring into space, the smiles, they were all taken from him. He even suggested which records Bob should play, starting with Spirit... That's when it all went to Hell".

Well, colour me un-surprised. How did it go?

"Goober began barging on the set: how can they play The Kinks instead of Colosseum? How can they play the Stones instead of Sun Ra? All this stuff. After a while nobody wanted anything to do with him, even if he was able to win some fans, which are STILL his fans, as far as I know".

So that's why he is uncredited?

"Oh yes, the producers kicked him back to Canada and that was that. Actually, you know the finale of the underwater scene, when Bob tries to save an Incredible String Band LP from drowning and then Nick Frost throws it back in the water going: this is not good! That bit was written in as a spoof, specifically aimed at Goober. Must have sizzled the little man!"

Did you hear anything from him, after that?

"No, it was all over pretty quick".

Which are your feelings about Bob, today?

"It's still a character I love. He tries to do the right thing, even if he's drugged out of his mind. 'A total immersion in the vinyl, you know?' That's a good line, and it came from Goober. You have to give credit where it's due".

Soon the afternoon was turning into evening, and my time with Mr. Frost was up. I declined the offer of a taxi and went walking in London, playing in my mind the Concrete Blonde's song. I ended up in Picadilly Circus and started humming "Is it really true, there are elephants and lions too...". A guy resembling Benedict Cumberbatch passed me by. It was really a weird scene.

**HomesickAlien** · January 29, 2014

hey guys, we gotta shoot for page 60 now! It's just behind the corner.

That could take a month at the rate people are posting in this thread. :| :P

**HomesickAlien** · January 29, 2014

The Yukon Blade Grinder Europe

Ralph Brown: "My character in Radio Rock is totally based on Goober"

http://www.hotflick.net/flicks/2009_The_Boat_That_Rocked/tn300/009BTR_Ralph_Brown_002.jpg

Slow days here in YBG Central? No way: even when the mighty YBG Men are still prowling the world, looking for clues on Captain LeComte and the dastardly Black Dwarf, we can always sip tea and find more about this Goober character whose fate, probably, still hangs from the beak of a giant owl in Toronto (New Readers alert: skip back some pages to make sense of the previous statement, or keep on reading and pretend you smoked a good one).

Case in point, I'm in London sharing a sunny winter afternoon with actor Ralph Brown, probably not the first movie star that would cross your mind, but still a man of considerable talent and experience, having starred in pivotal movies such as SW Episode I, Alien 3, Wayne's World 2.
But we are here to talk about his crowning achievement, at least as far as this reporter is concerned: the portrait of pot-brain DJ Bob, "The Dawn Treader", in the classic British comedy "Radio Rock" (or if you prefer "The Boat that Rocked").

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/it/5/51/ILoveRadioRock-2009.png
The cast of Radio Rock. Goober Brown second left.

"Yeah, we had Goober on as producer for a little while!" quips Brown with British nonchalance.
You what? I ask.
"Well, when I started working on my character, Bob, some friend from Canada called me and said: you gotta listen to Goober's radio show. That's all you need! The next day, the same friend dropped all the podcasts of this Interdimensional Vortex stuff in my mailbox. So I took to listen, and after a while I called the movie producers and said: you know guys, this Goober bloke might provide a valuable asset.
"So after some weeks, we were on the set and one day this dwarf walks in, come straight to me and says: you are all wrong! I still hadn't perfected the look of Bob, we were still trying stuff with the hairdressers and the glasses, but I have to admit that Goober's insight proved spot on. Without him, Bob would have turned out pretty lame, instead it became such an iconic character, even given the limited time screen I ended up having."

http://focusfeaturesmedia.com/uploads/image/mediafile/1258488703-814209a1c06da6245e20765b27e3567c/250.jpg

"Day after day, I started copying Goober's way and bring it all into Bob, you know what I mean? Even the staring into space, the smiles, they were all taken from him. He even suggested which records Bob should play, starting with Spirit... That's when it all went to Hell".
Well, colour me un-surprised. How did it go?
"Goober began barging on the set: how can they play The Kinks instead of Colosseum? How can they play the Stones instead of Sun Ra? All this stuff. After a while nobody wanted anything to do with him, even if he was able to win some fans, which are STILL his fans, as far as I know".
So that's why he is uncredited?
"Oh yes, the producers kicked him back to Canada and that was that. Actually, you know the finale of the underwater scene, when Bob tries to save an Incredible String Band LP from drowning and then Nick Frost throws it back in the water going: this is not good! That bit was written in as a spoof, specifically aimed at Goober. Must have sizzled the little man!"

Did you hear anything from him, after that?
"No, it was all over pretty quick".
Which are your feelings about Bob, today?
"It's still a character I love. He tries to do the right thing, even if he's drugged out of his mind. 'A total immersion in the vinyl, you know?' That's a good line, and it came from Goober. You have to give credit where it's due".

Soon the afternoon was turning into evening, and my time with Mr. Frost was up. I declined the offer of a taxi and went walking in London, playing in my mind the Concrete Blonde's song. I ended up in Picadilly Circus and started humming "Is it really true, there are elephants and lions too...". A guy resembling Benedict Cumberbatch passed me by. It was really a weird scene.

:ebert:

I propose this as Goober's new avatar:

http://i.imgur.com/zVux5Zi.png?2

:LOL:

**H. P. L.** · January 29, 2014

hey guys, we gotta shoot for page 60 now! It's just behind the corner.

That could take a month at the rate people are posting in this thread. :| :P

Glad to see you're back to your usual positive, optimistic self, Orson. :ph34r: :P

**H. P. L.** · January 29, 2014

The Yukon Blade Grinder Europe

Special Late Night Edition

This just in: Rushgoober resurfaces!!!!!

It took us 58 pages, an unnumbered number of weeks, sleepless nights, The Pope, superheroes, crazy motel managers, nervous breakdowns, countless interviews, but now we know.

People going home can stop holding their breath and lay out a sigh of relief: Rushgoober has been found.

More exactly, he has been found in a new video that has been making the rounds lately and is on the verge of becoming viral. We can only assume that TRF favourite Vapor Troll's prolonged abscence was due to his commitment to shooting this video. We were right all along in believing in Hobbit Metal, since it's truly Hobbit Metal that brings the Know-it-all of all Prog Things back to us.

Without further ado...

**HomesickAlien** · January 30, 2014

The Yukon Blade Grinder Europe

Special Late Night Edition

This just in: Rushgoober resurfaces!!!!!

It took us 58 pages, an unnumbered number of weeks, sleepless nights, The Pope, superheroes, crazy motel managers, nervous breakdowns, countless interviews, but now we know.
People going home can stop holding their breath and lay out a sigh of relief: Rushgoober has been found.
More exactly, he has been found in a new video that has been making the rounds lately and is on the verge of becoming viral. We can only assume that TRF favourite Vapor Troll's prolonged abscence was due to his commitment to shooting this video. We were right all along in believing in Hobbit Metal, since it's truly Hobbit Metal that brings the Know-it-all of all Prog Things back to us.
Without further ado...

:haz: :LOL:

Hey, what happened to the vid? :wtf:

**HomesickAlien** · January 30, 2014

hey guys, we gotta shoot for page 60 now! It's just behind the corner.

That could take a month at the rate people are posting in this thread. :| :P

Glad to see you're back to your usual positive, optimistic self, Orson. :P

Just keepin' it real, H.P.L. :P

**HomesickAlien** · January 30, 2014

The Yukon Blade Grinder Europe

Ralph Brown: "My character in Radio Rock is totally based on Goober"

http://www.hotflick.net/flicks/2009_The_Boat_That_Rocked/tn300/009BTR_Ralph_Brown_002.jpg

Slow days here in YBG Central? No way: even when the mighty YBG Men are still prowling the world, looking for clues on Captain LeComte and the dastardly Black Dwarf, we can always sip tea and find more about this Goober character whose fate, probably, still hangs from the beak of a giant owl in Toronto (New Readers alert: skip back some pages to make sense of the previous statement, or keep on reading and pretend you smoked a good one).

Case in point, I'm in London sharing a sunny winter afternoon with actor Ralph Brown, probably not the first movie star that would cross your mind, but still a man of considerable talent and experience, having starred in pivotal movies such as SW Episode I, Alien 3, Wayne's World 2.
But we are here to talk about his crowning achievement, at least as far as this reporter is concerned: the portrait of pot-brain DJ Bob, "The Dawn Treader", in the classic British comedy "Radio Rock" (or if you prefer "The Boat that Rocked").

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/it/5/51/ILoveRadioRock-2009.png
The cast of Radio Rock. Goober Brown second left.

"Yeah, we had Goober on as producer for a little while!" quips Brown with British nonchalance.
You what? I ask.
"Well, when I started working on my character, Bob, some friend from Canada called me and said: you gotta listen to Goober's radio show. That's all you need! The next day, the same friend dropped all the podcasts of this Interdimensional Vortex stuff in my mailbox. So I took to listen, and after a while I called the movie producers and said: you know guys, this Goober bloke might provide a valuable asset.
"So after some weeks, we were on the set and one day this dwarf walks in, come straight to me and says: you are all wrong! I still hadn't perfected the look of Bob, we were still trying stuff with the hairdressers and the glasses, but I have to admit that Goober's insight proved spot on. Without him, Bob would have turned out pretty lame, instead it became such an iconic character, even given the limited time screen I ended up having."

http://focusfeaturesmedia.com/uploads/image/mediafile/1258488703-814209a1c06da6245e20765b27e3567c/250.jpg

"Day after day, I started copying Goober's way and bring it all into Bob, you know what I mean? Even the staring into space, the smiles, they were all taken from him. He even suggested which records Bob should play, starting with Spirit... That's when it all went to Hell".
Well, colour me un-surprised. How did it go?
"Goober began barging on the set: how can they play The Kinks instead of Colosseum? How can they play the Stones instead of Sun Ra? All this stuff. After a while nobody wanted anything to do with him, even if he was able to win some fans, which are STILL his fans, as far as I know".
So that's why he is uncredited?
"Oh yes, the producers kicked him back to Canada and that was that. Actually, you know the finale of the underwater scene, when Bob tries to save an Incredible String Band LP from drowning and then Nick Frost throws it back in the water going: this is not good! That bit was written in as a spoof, specifically aimed at Goober. Must have sizzled the little man!"

Did you hear anything from him, after that?
"No, it was all over pretty quick".
Which are your feelings about Bob, today?
"It's still a character I love. He tries to do the right thing, even if he's drugged out of his mind. 'A total immersion in the vinyl, you know?' That's a good line, and it came from Goober. You have to give credit where it's due".

Soon the afternoon was turning into evening, and my time with Mr. Frost was up. I declined the offer of a taxi and went walking in London, playing in my mind the Concrete Blonde's song. I ended up in Picadilly Circus and started humming "Is it really true, there are elephants and lions too...". A guy resembling Benedict Cumberbatch passed me by. It was really a weird scene.

:bump:

**HomesickAlien** · January 30, 2014

http://i.imgur.com/rMHspqJ.png

EXCLUSIVE:

YBG REPORTER TELLS ALL

Substancewithoutstyle talks candidly about the Goober case,

his colleagues, and more.

29 Jan 2014

by Julia Gillard, Times Gossip Reporter

It can become rather boring being an entertainment reporter in Brisbane. After all, there are a limited number of footballers and vapid socialites to keep tabs on, so I was delighted when my editor asked me to interview an American celebrity. Since Angelina Jolie is the only one who spends an appreciable amount of time in Queensland, I just assumed it would be her. However, I was a bit crestfallen to learn that my time would be spent in conversation with Substancewithoutstyle, a reporter from the Yukon Blade Grinder, a dubious publication based in a town called Goatnut, Tennessee.

My knowledge of Rushgoober and the Neverland Cult was limited, but my editor said it had been a slow week and he needed some page filler. He assured me that it wouldn't take much of my time and would make for some interesting reading, so I reluctantly took the address from him and set off for my meeting with Mr. Style.

http://i.imgur.com/UHVHCGP.png

The Q1 towers above the beaches (and swamps) of the Gold Coast, Queensland

As I asked myself why I was wasting my time on such an obscure figure, I took note of the address on the slip of paper and all second thoughts vanished. I was to meet Style in a posh rental apartment in the Q1 Tower. How could a lowly reporter afford such accommodations? I was intrigued. . .

http://i.imgur.com/n54aPl8.png

I was filled with anticipation as I knocked on the door to apartment 2112, but when the door opened I was greeted by a curious, geeky, Edward Snowden-like character with glasses. He was no slave to fashion, either. His manner of dress could best be described as Robert Plant circa 1995. Had he changed his style since high school? I had to remind myself that I wasn't there to judge his appearance, so I got down to business.

I know this is none of my concern, but how can you afford this place?

"Pretty cool, isn't it? This is all courtesy of the Grinder. I got tired of living on the cheap when I came down here, eating at Hungry Jack's and all, so I put this place on the Grinder's tab. After all I've been through I think I deserve a little pampering. Besides, Tombstone never reimbursed me for that Salvatore Ferragamo shirt. I just hope he didn't spend all of his money on hookers at the Soak and Poke."

How did you become involved with the Yukon Blade Grinder?

"I went to California to protest what I perceived to be the unjust persecution of Goober, but as the facts were revealed it became apparent that the little prick was guilty as sin. The next thing I knew Tombstone had recruited me as some sort of correspondent, making demands about the headers of my articles and such. To make matters worse, we had to go from sunny California to the frozen tundra of Toronto, where my stalker Norman came looking for me. That incident put me over the edge."

So you came to Australia?

"I had to get away from the chaos of Toronto; Rush are almost unknown here, the weather is beautiful (if you like heat waves), and since I'm familiar with the area it seemed like the perfect getaway. In retrospect, I shouldn't have left the Huguenot without telling someone, but Tombstone should make allowances for odd behaviour considering the stress I've been under."

Speaking of Rush, do you think they'll ever come to Australia?

"Ha! Are you kidding? There's no profit to be made here. Sure, it would be nice for the smattering of fans they have here if they would play a few clubs in Sydney, Melbourne, Perth and Brisbane, but that will never happen. Alex said they once did a show without all the bells and whistles for about 500 people in a club somewhere, but they wouldn't do it again. It's not like they could fill Suncorp Stadium. Coldplay, sure. Rush, pffft. You have your own musical icons, I mean, didn't INXS replace Michael Hutchence after he strangled himself whacking off?"

But wouldn't even a small tour provide Neil with material for his blog?

"Christ, we don't need that! I'm sure he'd take a cross-country bike tour with his manservant, Michael Mosbach, then proceed to describe every rock and flower he came across in excruciating detail. You can bet it would also be peppered with his half-baked sociopolitical commentary. If Goober read that he'd probably be driven to the brink of suicide."

You'll be returning to Toronto?

"I suppose I'll head back to the Huguenot Motel. I do feel guilty for leaving because H.P.L. has been doing all of the reporting by himself from his end, traipsing off to all sorts of exotic and strange locales, and never complaining a bit. I should do more to pull my weight; maybe look for more of Alex and Geddy's old haunts. I never know what interesting characters I'll run into."

Any final thoughts about Goober?

"He should freeze his balls off up there in that cage. If he hadn't been such a vicious little troll at TRF I wouldn't have had to go through all this. I hope Mayor Ford sells him to a vivisectionist."

* * * * *

As I drove back to my office at the Times, I couldn't help but think how lucky we were that Rush never became popular in Australia. I could only imagine arenas full of air-drumming geeks and nerds, not to mention the fact that Goober could have ended up in a cage suspended from the Sydney Harbour Bridge. How pathetic would that have been?

**H. P. L.** · January 30, 2014

http://i.imgur.com/rMHspqJ.png

EXCLUSIVE:
YBG REPORTER TELLS ALL

Substancewithoutstyle talks candidly about the Goober case,
his colleagues, and more.

29 Jan 2014
by Julia Gillard, Times Gossip Reporter

It can become rather boring being an entertainment reporter in Brisbane. After all, there are a limited number of footballers and vapid socialites to keep tabs on, so I was delighted when my editor asked me to interview an American celebrity. Since Angelina Jolie is the only one who spends an appreciable amount of time in Queensland, I just assumed it would be her. However, I was a bit crestfallen to learn that my time would be spent in conversation with Substancewithoutstyle, a reporter from the Yukon Blade Grinder, a dubious publication based in a town called Goatnut, Tennessee.

My knowledge of Rushgoober and the Neverland Cult was limited, but my editor said it had been a slow week and he needed some page filler. He assured me that it wouldn't take much of my time and would make for some interesting reading, so I reluctantly took the address from him and set off for my meeting with Mr. Style.

http://i.imgur.com/UHVHCGP.png
The Q1 towers above the beaches (and swamps) of the Gold Coast, Queensland

As I asked myself why I was wasting my time on such an obscure figure, I took note of the address on the slip of paper and all second thoughts vanished. I was to meet Style in a posh rental apartment in the Q1 Tower. How could a lowly reporter afford such accommodations? I was intrigued. . .

http://i.imgur.com/n54aPl8.png

I was filled with anticipation as I knocked on the door to apartment 2112, but when the door opened I was greeted by a curious, geeky, Edward Snowden-like character with glasses. He was no slave to fashion, either. His manner of dress could best be described as Robert Plant circa 1995. Had he changed his style since high school? I had to remind myself that I wasn't there to judge his appearance, so I got down to business.

I know this is none of my concern, but how can you afford this place?

"Pretty cool, isn't it? This is all courtesy of the Grinder. I got tired of living on the cheap when I came down here, eating at Hungry Jack's and all, so I put this place on the Grinder's tab. After all I've been through I think I deserve a little pampering. Besides, Tombstone never reimbursed me for that Salvatore Ferragamo shirt. I just hope he didn't spend all of his money on hookers at the Soak and Poke."

How did you become involved with the Yukon Blade Grinder?

"I went to California to protest what I perceived to be the unjust persecution of Goober, but as the facts were revealed it became apparent that the little prick was guilty as sin. The next thing I knew Tombstone had recruited me as some sort of correspondent, making demands about the headers of my articles and such. To make matters worse, we had to go from sunny California to the frozen tundra of Toronto, where my stalker Norman came looking for me. That incident put me over the edge."

So you came to Australia?

"I had to get away from the chaos of Toronto; Rush are almost unknown here, the weather is beautiful (if you like heat waves), and since I'm familiar with the area it seemed like the perfect getaway. In retrospect, I shouldn't have left the Huguenot without telling someone, but Tombstone should make allowances for odd behaviour considering the stress I've been under."

Speaking of Rush, do you think they'll ever come to Australia?

"Ha! Are you kidding? There's no profit to be made here. Sure, it would be nice for the smattering of fans they have here if they would play a few clubs in Sydney, Melbourne, Perth and Brisbane, but that will never happen. Alex said they once did a show without all the bells and whistles for about 500 people in a club somewhere, but they wouldn't do it again. It's not like they could fill Suncorp Stadium. Coldplay, sure. Rush, pffft. You have your own musical icons, I mean, didn't INXS replace Michael Hutchence after he strangled himself whacking off?"

But wouldn't even a small tour provide Neil with material for his blog?

"Christ, we don't need that! I'm sure he'd take a cross-country bike tour with his manservant, Michael Mosbach, then proceed to describe every rock and flower he came across in excruciating detail. You can bet it would also be peppered with his half-baked sociopolitical commentary. If Goober read that he'd probably be driven to the brink of suicide."

You'll be returning to Toronto?

"I suppose I'll head back to the Huguenot Motel. I do feel guilty for leaving because H.P.L. has been doing all of the reporting by himself from his end, traipsing off to all sorts of exotic and strange locales, and never complaining a bit. I should do more to pull my weight; maybe look for more of Alex and Geddy's old haunts. I never know what interesting characters I'll run into."

Any final thoughts about Goober?

"He should freeze his balls off up there in that cage. If he hadn't been such a vicious little troll at TRF I wouldn't have had to go through all this. I hope Mayor Ford sells him to a vivisectionist."

* * * * *

As I drove back to my office at the Times, I couldn't help but think how lucky we were that Rush never became popular in Australia. I could only imagine arenas full of air-drumming geeks and nerds, not to mention the fact that Goober could have ended up in a cage suspended from the Sydney Harbour Bridge. How pathetic would that have been?

:laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy:

ABSOTIVELY, POSILUTELY MASTERPIECE!!!!!!!

:7up: :7up: :7up: :7up: :LOL: :lol: :LOL: :lol: :LOL:

:ebert: :ebert: :ebert: :ebert: :ebert:

**Tombstone Mountain** · January 31, 2014

hey guys, we gotta shoot for page 60 now! It's just behind the corner.

That could take a month at the rate people are posting in this thread. :| :P

Thanks for picking up the slack cub reporters. I'm dealing with a death in the family at the moment. It has been a protracted situation and I'll be back before you know it. Life is always a challenge,even for the creator of the YBG. Keep 'em coming they're awesome!

**Tombstone Mountain** · January 31, 2014

The Yukon Blade Grinder Europe

Ralph Brown: "My character in Radio Rock is totally based on Goober"

http://www.hotflick.net/flicks/2009_The_Boat_That_Rocked/tn300/009BTR_Ralph_Brown_002.jpg

Slow days here in YBG Central? No way: even when the mighty YBG Men are still prowling the world, looking for clues on Captain LeComte and the dastardly Black Dwarf, we can always sip tea and find more about this Goober character whose fate, probably, still hangs from the beak of a giant owl in Toronto (New Readers alert: skip back some pages to make sense of the previous statement, or keep on reading and pretend you smoked a good one).

Case in point, I'm in London sharing a sunny winter afternoon with actor Ralph Brown, probably not the first movie star that would cross your mind, but still a man of considerable talent and experience, having starred in pivotal movies such as SW Episode I, Alien 3, Wayne's World 2.
But we are here to talk about his crowning achievement, at least as far as this reporter is concerned: the portrait of pot-brain DJ Bob, "The Dawn Treader", in the classic British comedy "Radio Rock" (or if you prefer "The Boat that Rocked").

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/it/5/51/ILoveRadioRock-2009.png
The cast of Radio Rock. Goober Brown second left.

"Yeah, we had Goober on as producer for a little while!" quips Brown with British nonchalance.
You what? I ask.
"Well, when I started working on my character, Bob, some friend from Canada called me and said: you gotta listen to Goober's radio show. That's all you need! The next day, the same friend dropped all the podcasts of this Interdimensional Vortex stuff in my mailbox. So I took to listen, and after a while I called the movie producers and said: you know guys, this Goober bloke might provide a valuable asset.
"So after some weeks, we were on the set and one day this dwarf walks in, come straight to me and says: you are all wrong! I still hadn't perfected the look of Bob, we were still trying stuff with the hairdressers and the glasses, but I have to admit that Goober's insight proved spot on. Without him, Bob would have turned out pretty lame, instead it became such an iconic character, even given the limited time screen I ended up having."

http://focusfeaturesmedia.com/uploads/image/mediafile/1258488703-814209a1c06da6245e20765b27e3567c/250.jpg

"Day after day, I started copying Goober's way and bring it all into Bob, you know what I mean? Even the staring into space, the smiles, they were all taken from him. He even suggested which records Bob should play, starting with Spirit... That's when it all went to Hell".
Well, colour me un-surprised. How did it go?
"Goober began barging on the set: how can they play The Kinks instead of Colosseum? How can they play the Stones instead of Sun Ra? All this stuff. After a while nobody wanted anything to do with him, even if he was able to win some fans, which are STILL his fans, as far as I know".
So that's why he is uncredited?
"Oh yes, the producers kicked him back to Canada and that was that. Actually, you know the finale of the underwater scene, when Bob tries to save an Incredible String Band LP from drowning and then Nick Frost throws it back in the water going: this is not good! That bit was written in as a spoof, specifically aimed at Goober. Must have sizzled the little man!"

Did you hear anything from him, after that?
"No, it was all over pretty quick".
Which are your feelings about Bob, today?
"It's still a character I love. He tries to do the right thing, even if he's drugged out of his mind. 'A total immersion in the vinyl, you know?' That's a good line, and it came from Goober. You have to give credit where it's due".

Soon the afternoon was turning into evening, and my time with Mr. Frost was up. I declined the offer of a taxi and went walking in London, playing in my mind the Concrete Blonde's song. I ended up in Picadilly Circus and started humming "Is it really true, there are elephants and lions too...". A guy resembling Benedict Cumberbatch passed me by. It was really a weird scene.

Awesome. So awesome. You Rock!

**Tombstone Mountain** · January 31, 2014

http://i.imgur.com/rMHspqJ.png

EXCLUSIVE:
YBG REPORTER TELLS ALL

Substancewithoutstyle talks candidly about the Goober case,
his colleagues, and more.

29 Jan 2014
by Julia Gillard, Times Gossip Reporter

It can become rather boring being an entertainment reporter in Brisbane. After all, there are a limited number of footballers and vapid socialites to keep tabs on, so I was delighted when my editor asked me to interview an American celebrity. Since Angelina Jolie is the only one who spends an appreciable amount of time in Queensland, I just assumed it would be her. However, I was a bit crestfallen to learn that my time would be spent in conversation with Substancewithoutstyle, a reporter from the Yukon Blade Grinder, a dubious publication based in a town called Goatnut, Tennessee.

My knowledge of Rushgoober and the Neverland Cult was limited, but my editor said it had been a slow week and he needed some page filler. He assured me that it wouldn't take much of my time and would make for some interesting reading, so I reluctantly took the address from him and set off for my meeting with Mr. Style.

http://i.imgur.com/UHVHCGP.png
The Q1 towers above the beaches (and swamps) of the Gold Coast, Queensland

As I asked myself why I was wasting my time on such an obscure figure, I took note of the address on the slip of paper and all second thoughts vanished. I was to meet Style in a posh rental apartment in the Q1 Tower. How could a lowly reporter afford such accommodations? I was intrigued. . .

http://i.imgur.com/n54aPl8.png

I was filled with anticipation as I knocked on the door to apartment 2112, but when the door opened I was greeted by a curious, geeky, Edward Snowden-like character with glasses. He was no slave to fashion, either. His manner of dress could best be described as Robert Plant circa 1995. Had he changed his style since high school? I had to remind myself that I wasn't there to judge his appearance, so I got down to business.

I know this is none of my concern, but how can you afford this place?

"Pretty cool, isn't it? This is all courtesy of the Grinder. I got tired of living on the cheap when I came down here, eating at Hungry Jack's and all, so I put this place on the Grinder's tab. After all I've been through I think I deserve a little pampering. Besides, Tombstone never reimbursed me for that Salvatore Ferragamo shirt. I just hope he didn't spend all of his money on hookers at the Soak and Poke."

How did you become involved with the Yukon Blade Grinder?

"I went to California to protest what I perceived to be the unjust persecution of Goober, but as the facts were revealed it became apparent that the little prick was guilty as sin. The next thing I knew Tombstone had recruited me as some sort of correspondent, making demands about the headers of my articles and such. To make matters worse, we had to go from sunny California to the frozen tundra of Toronto, where my stalker Norman came looking for me. That incident put me over the edge."

So you came to Australia?

"I had to get away from the chaos of Toronto; Rush are almost unknown here, the weather is beautiful (if you like heat waves), and since I'm familiar with the area it seemed like the perfect getaway. In retrospect, I shouldn't have left the Huguenot without telling someone, but Tombstone should make allowances for odd behaviour considering the stress I've been under."

Speaking of Rush, do you think they'll ever come to Australia?

"Ha! Are you kidding? There's no profit to be made here. Sure, it would be nice for the smattering of fans they have here if they would play a few clubs in Sydney, Melbourne, Perth and Brisbane, but that will never happen. Alex said they once did a show without all the bells and whistles for about 500 people in a club somewhere, but they wouldn't do it again. It's not like they could fill Suncorp Stadium. Coldplay, sure. Rush, pffft. You have your own musical icons, I mean, didn't INXS replace Michael Hutchence after he strangled himself whacking off?"

But wouldn't even a small tour provide Neil with material for his blog?

"Christ, we don't need that! I'm sure he'd take a cross-country bike tour with his manservant, Michael Mosbach, then proceed to describe every rock and flower he came across in excruciating detail. You can bet it would also be peppered with his half-baked sociopolitical commentary. If Goober read that he'd probably be driven to the brink of suicide."

You'll be returning to Toronto?

"I suppose I'll head back to the Huguenot Motel. I do feel guilty for leaving because H.P.L. has been doing all of the reporting by himself from his end, traipsing off to all sorts of exotic and strange locales, and never complaining a bit. I should do more to pull my weight; maybe look for more of Alex and Geddy's old haunts. I never know what interesting characters I'll run into."

Any final thoughts about Goober?

"He should freeze his balls off up there in that cage. If he hadn't been such a vicious little troll at TRF I wouldn't have had to go through all this. I hope Mayor Ford sells him to a vivisectionist."

* * * * *

As I drove back to my office at the Times, I couldn't help but think how lucky we were that Rush never became popular in Australia. I could only imagine arenas full of air-drumming geeks and nerds, not to mention the fact that Goober could have ended up in a cage suspended from the Sydney Harbour Bridge. How pathetic would that have been?

Great reporting per usual SWS!

**HomesickAlien** · February 2, 2014

http://i.imgur.com/rMHspqJ.png

EXCLUSIVE:
YBG REPORTER TELLS ALL

Substancewithoutstyle talks candidly about the Goober case,
his colleagues, and more.

29 Jan 2014
by Julia Gillard, Times Gossip Reporter

It can become rather boring being an entertainment reporter in Brisbane. After all, there are a limited number of footballers and vapid socialites to keep tabs on, so I was delighted when my editor asked me to interview an American celebrity. Since Angelina Jolie is the only one who spends an appreciable amount of time in Queensland, I just assumed it would be her. However, I was a bit crestfallen to learn that my time would be spent in conversation with Substancewithoutstyle, a reporter from the Yukon Blade Grinder, a dubious publication based in a town called Goatnut, Tennessee.

My knowledge of Rushgoober and the Neverland Cult was limited, but my editor said it had been a slow week and he needed some page filler. He assured me that it wouldn't take much of my time and would make for some interesting reading, so I reluctantly took the address from him and set off for my meeting with Mr. Style.

http://i.imgur.com/UHVHCGP.png
The Q1 towers above the beaches (and swamps) of the Gold Coast, Queensland

As I asked myself why I was wasting my time on such an obscure figure, I took note of the address on the slip of paper and all second thoughts vanished. I was to meet Style in a posh rental apartment in the Q1 Tower. How could a lowly reporter afford such accommodations? I was intrigued. . .

http://i.imgur.com/n54aPl8.png

I was filled with anticipation as I knocked on the door to apartment 2112, but when the door opened I was greeted by a curious, geeky, Edward Snowden-like character with glasses. He was no slave to fashion, either. His manner of dress could best be described as Robert Plant circa 1995. Had he changed his style since high school? I had to remind myself that I wasn't there to judge his appearance, so I got down to business.

I know this is none of my concern, but how can you afford this place?

"Pretty cool, isn't it? This is all courtesy of the Grinder. I got tired of living on the cheap when I came down here, eating at Hungry Jack's and all, so I put this place on the Grinder's tab. After all I've been through I think I deserve a little pampering. Besides, Tombstone never reimbursed me for that Salvatore Ferragamo shirt. I just hope he didn't spend all of his money on hookers at the Soak and Poke."

How did you become involved with the Yukon Blade Grinder?

"I went to California to protest what I perceived to be the unjust persecution of Goober, but as the facts were revealed it became apparent that the little prick was guilty as sin. The next thing I knew Tombstone had recruited me as some sort of correspondent, making demands about the headers of my articles and such. To make matters worse, we had to go from sunny California to the frozen tundra of Toronto, where my stalker Norman came looking for me. That incident put me over the edge."

So you came to Australia?

"I had to get away from the chaos of Toronto; Rush are almost unknown here, the weather is beautiful (if you like heat waves), and since I'm familiar with the area it seemed like the perfect getaway. In retrospect, I shouldn't have left the Huguenot without telling someone, but Tombstone should make allowances for odd behaviour considering the stress I've been under."

Speaking of Rush, do you think they'll ever come to Australia?

"Ha! Are you kidding? There's no profit to be made here. Sure, it would be nice for the smattering of fans they have here if they would play a few clubs in Sydney, Melbourne, Perth and Brisbane, but that will never happen. Alex said they once did a show without all the bells and whistles for about 500 people in a club somewhere, but they wouldn't do it again. It's not like they could fill Suncorp Stadium. Coldplay, sure. Rush, pffft. You have your own musical icons, I mean, didn't INXS replace Michael Hutchence after he strangled himself whacking off?"

But wouldn't even a small tour provide Neil with material for his blog?

"Christ, we don't need that! I'm sure he'd take a cross-country bike tour with his manservant, Michael Mosbach, then proceed to describe every rock and flower he came across in excruciating detail. You can bet it would also be peppered with his half-baked sociopolitical commentary. If Goober read that he'd probably be driven to the brink of suicide."

You'll be returning to Toronto?

"I suppose I'll head back to the Huguenot Motel. I do feel guilty for leaving because H.P.L. has been doing all of the reporting by himself from his end, traipsing off to all sorts of exotic and strange locales, and never complaining a bit. I should do more to pull my weight; maybe look for more of Alex and Geddy's old haunts. I never know what interesting characters I'll run into."

Any final thoughts about Goober?

"He should freeze his balls off up there in that cage. If he hadn't been such a vicious little troll at TRF I wouldn't have had to go through all this. I hope Mayor Ford sells him to a vivisectionist."

* * * * *

As I drove back to my office at the Times, I couldn't help but think how lucky we were that Rush never became popular in Australia. I could only imagine arenas full of air-drumming geeks and nerds, not to mention the fact that Goober could have ended up in a cage suspended from the Sydney Harbour Bridge. How pathetic would that have been?

:laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy:
ABSOTIVELY, POSILUTELY MASTERPIECE!!!!!!!

:7up: :7up: :7up: :7up: :lol: :lol:

:ebert: :ebert: :ebert: :ebert: :ebert:

:cheers:

Just trying to redeem myself after my inexcusable absence!

**H. P. L.** · February 3, 2014

The Yukon Blade Grinder Europe

The Quest for Captain LeComte

Chapter Three: The Ballad of John Toad (A homage to John Steinbeck)

John Toad was a nobody.

The closer he came to rock-stardom was playing in his basement with his buddies, in an all-male garage band deceptively called "The Hot Bitches from Hell".

They even released a debut album in 1969 called "We are Aliens", now a much sought-after rarity for psychedelia junkies and american garage rock collectors.

John Toad was telling the truth.

He was an alien. He came from planet Megadon, and he was something of a pioneer, because he came to Earth in 1962, the first of his kind, all alone.

This puzzled out the reporter.

The reporter also was a nobody.

He worked for a dubious publication based in Goatnut, TN, called "The Yukon Blade Grinder", and was following an even more dubious trail of news that encompassed The Pope, time travel, a new religion called Goober-Pantheism, super heroes, symphonic power metal and said aliens, in a giant effort to make some sense of it all.

John Toad did the smart thing.

In 1970 he cut his hair, started a new regime of "one joint only and after work" and went corporate. When he retired, in 1996, he did what every American dreams to do. He bought a place in the sun.

The reporter, being Italian, knew Tuscany quite well.

But even he was amazed after trespassing the gate of the casolare on the outskirts of the small medieval city of San Gimignano. This was the house of an alien. This was John Toad's world. A world made of brick, wood, sand, mud and crops. John Toad was out in the fields, tending his uliveto, and the reporter had to begrudgingly help him out.

http://www.visitsitaly.com/images/tuscany-im/san_gimignano-im/san_gimignano-panorama.jpg

"Mr Toad" said the reporter "I thought the only people from Megadon living on Earth were the expats from the Mighty Mothership Bub-Bah, forced to flee from the orbit of Mars in 1980 after the Schism between Captain LeComte and Lieutenant Curratello!".

The reporter spoke too much.

"I have nothing to do with them" said John Toad. "I came here on my own".

"But how?" asked the reporter.

John Toad shrugged. He knew that question was coming, sooner or later.

John Toad was a good man.

He never in his life beat a woman or a child. He never said lies. He spoke only when he had something to say. After all, he was the last philosopher.

At a time when all the people of Megadon, after seeing the broadcasts of WWII with a huge timelapse, were certain that humanity had committed mass suicide, not everyone turned to science to find a way to save us.

There was a small bunch of people that believed that the spirit is stronger than the brain and, among other things, even faster than light.

John Toad was the first.

He was the first to go, travelling through astral space, covering the infinite distance between Megadon and Earth in a mere heartbeat. Namely, the last heartbeat of John Toad, aged 6, who had just drowned swimming in the creek. One heartbeat. Was all it took.

John Toad was the miracle kid.

But that, fortunately, did not last long. What did last long was his waiting. He waited and waited for his brothers in spirit to join him on Earth. But no one came. By the time the Summer of Love was rolling all over the world, John Toad did the only thing to do. Formed a band.

John Toad could tell no lies.

That's why all the barely audible lyrics of his songs (he was the only songwriter) were small variations on the concept of "Where the f**k are you losers?". The other guys in the band thought John was all about spiritual quest. Instead, he was all about spiritual panic. He was stranded, alone, in a world that had nothing to do with him.

"I eventually did find out what happened to my brothers" John Toad told the reporter, after dinner, in front of a good bottle.

"They were accused of necromancy and high treason. They were all slaughtered. A dark chapter of our history, hidden from knowledge. But Captain LeComte knew".

Captain LeComte! jumped up the reporter. I've been looking for him everywhere!

John Toad met Captain LeComte in 1982, at a Rush concert in Los Angeles.

LeComte had summoned him via telepathy. John Toad had gotten used to telepathic silence since his arrival, but here were people from his home planet! And yet, a planet that had killed his brothers. John Toad had nothing more to do with Megadon.

John Toad liked LeComte.

They had been hearing from each other regularly ever since. "Who is he?" kept asking the reporter. "Who is Captain LeComte?". But no answer came from John Toad. The Black Dwarf had stubbed him to death.

The Black Dwarf, the sole prophet of Goober-Pantheism, renegade scientist from the Ultra-secret Vatican Science Team known only as The Pope SS, had entered the small room like a bat dressed in shadows. What was he after? What did he want?

The reporter won't be able to answer those questions, because after a small physical confrontation, the Black Dwarf slipped away. "You won't escape forever, wretch!" yelled the reporter. "I'll bring my YBG-Men next time!!". And all he could do was kneel down on the dying first alien.

John Toad knew he was dying.

With his last strenght, he clutched to the arms of the reporter.

"Listen", said John Toad. "Captain LeComte is..."

Yes, yes, who is he? Who is Captain LeComte?

"Captain LeComte is... is... Ethan Hawke..."

The yell of the reporter covered John Toad's last breath.

WHAAAAAAAAT??????

**Tombstone Mountain** · February 4, 2014

The Yukon Blade Grinder Europe

The Quest for Captain LeComte

Chapter Three: The Ballad of John Toad (A homage to John Steinbeck)

John Toad was a nobody.
The closer he came to rock-stardom was playing in his basement with his buddies, in an all-male garage band deceptively called "The Hot Bitches from Hell".
They even released a debut album in 1969 called "We are Aliens", now a much sought-after rarity for psychedelia junkies and american garage rock collectors.
John Toad was telling the truth.
He was an alien. He came from planet Megadon, and he was something of a pioneer, because he came to Earth in 1962, the first of his kind, all alone.
This puzzled out the reporter.

The reporter also was a nobody.
He worked for a dubious publication based in Goatnut, TN, called "The Yukon Blade Grinder", and was following an even more dubious trail of news that encompassed The Pope, time travel, a new religion called Goober-Pantheism, super heroes, symphonic power metal and said aliens, in a giant effort to make some sense of it all.

John Toad did the smart thing.
In 1970 he cut his hair, started a new regime of "one joint only and after work" and went corporate. When he retired, in 1996, he did what every American dreams to do. He bought a place in the sun.

The reporter, being Italian, knew Tuscany quite well.
But even he was amazed after trespassing the gate of the casolare on the outskirts of the small medieval city of San Gimignano. This was the house of an alien. This was John Toad's world. A world made of brick, wood, sand, mud and crops. John Toad was out in the fields, tending his uliveto, and the reporter had to begrudgingly help him out.

http://www.visitsitaly.com/images/tuscany-im/san_gimignano-im/san_gimignano-panorama.jpg

"Mr Toad" said the reporter "I thought the only people from Megadon living on Earth were the expats from the Mighty Mothership Bub-Bah, forced to flee from the orbit of Mars in 1980 after the Schism between Captain LeComte and Lieutenant Curratello!".
The reporter spoke too much.
"I have nothing to do with them" said John Toad. "I came here on my own".
"But how?" asked the reporter.
John Toad shrugged. He knew that question was coming, sooner or later.

John Toad was a good man.
He never in his life beat a woman or a child. He never said lies. He spoke only when he had something to say. After all, he was the last philosopher.
At a time when all the people of Megadon, after seeing the broadcasts of WWII with a huge timelapse, were certain that humanity had committed mass suicide, not everyone turned to science to find a way to save us.
There was a small bunch of people that believed that the spirit is stronger than the brain and, among other things, even faster than light.

John Toad was the first.
He was the first to go, travelling through astral space, covering the infinite distance between Megadon and Earth in a mere heartbeat. Namely, the last heartbeat of John Toad, aged 6, who had just drowned swimming in the creek. One heartbeat. Was all it took.

John Toad was the miracle kid.
But that, fortunately, did not last long. What did last long was his waiting. He waited and waited for his brothers in spirit to join him on Earth. But no one came. By the time the Summer of Love was rolling all over the world, John Toad did the only thing to do. Formed a band.

John Toad could tell no lies.
That's why all the barely audible lyrics of his songs (he was the only songwriter) were small variations on the concept of "Where the f**k are you losers?". The other guys in the band thought John was all about spiritual quest. Instead, he was all about spiritual panic. He was stranded, alone, in a world that had nothing to do with him.

"I eventually did find out what happened to my brothers" John Toad told the reporter, after dinner, in front of a good bottle.
"They were accused of necromancy and high treason. They were all slaughtered. A dark chapter of our history, hidden from knowledge. But Captain LeComte knew".
Captain LeComte! jumped up the reporter. I've been looking for him everywhere!

John Toad met Captain LeComte in 1982, at a Rush concert in Los Angeles.
LeComte had summoned him via telepathy. John Toad had gotten used to telepathic silence since his arrival, but here were people from his home planet! And yet, a planet that had killed his brothers. John Toad had nothing more to do with Megadon.

John Toad liked LeComte.
They had been hearing from each other regularly ever since. "Who is he?" kept asking the reporter. "Who is Captain LeComte?". But no answer came from John Toad. The Black Dwarf had stubbed him to death.

The Black Dwarf, the sole prophet of Goober-Pantheism, renegade scientist from the Ultra-secret Vatican Science Team known only as The Pope SS, had entered the small room like a bat dressed in shadows. What was he after? What did he want?

The reporter won't be able to answer those questions, because after a small physical confrontation, the Black Dwarf slipped away. "You won't escape forever, wretch!" yelled the reporter. "I'll bring my YBG-Men next time!!". And all he could do was kneel down on the dying first alien.

John Toad knew he was dying.
With his last strenght, he clutched to the arms of the reporter.
"Listen", said John Toad. "Captain LeComte is..."
Yes, yes, who is he? Who is Captain LeComte?
"Captain LeComte is... is... Ethan Hawke..."
The yell of the reporter covered John Toad's last breath.
WHAAAAAAAAT??????

This is badass Rocko! You are proving to be worth all the hookers, unaccounted funds, and that mysterious purchase of a yacht on the Blade Grinder dime. Well done. Inspiring. F'n crazy!

**HomesickAlien** · February 6, 2014

The Yukon Blade Grinder Europe

The Quest for Captain LeComte

Chapter Three: The Ballad of John Toad (A homage to John Steinbeck)

John Toad was a nobody.
The closer he came to rock-stardom was playing in his basement with his buddies, in an all-male garage band deceptively called "The Hot Bitches from Hell".
They even released a debut album in 1969 called "We are Aliens", now a much sought-after rarity for psychedelia junkies and american garage rock collectors.
John Toad was telling the truth.
He was an alien. He came from planet Megadon, and he was something of a pioneer, because he came to Earth in 1962, the first of his kind, all alone.
This puzzled out the reporter.

The reporter also was a nobody.
He worked for a dubious publication based in Goatnut, TN, called "The Yukon Blade Grinder", and was following an even more dubious trail of news that encompassed The Pope, time travel, a new religion called Goober-Pantheism, super heroes, symphonic power metal and said aliens, in a giant effort to make some sense of it all.

John Toad did the smart thing.
In 1970 he cut his hair, started a new regime of "one joint only and after work" and went corporate. When he retired, in 1996, he did what every American dreams to do. He bought a place in the sun.

The reporter, being Italian, knew Tuscany quite well.
But even he was amazed after trespassing the gate of the casolare on the outskirts of the small medieval city of San Gimignano. This was the house of an alien. This was John Toad's world. A world made of brick, wood, sand, mud and crops. John Toad was out in the fields, tending his uliveto, and the reporter had to begrudgingly help him out.

http://www.visitsitaly.com/images/tuscany-im/san_gimignano-im/san_gimignano-panorama.jpg

"Mr Toad" said the reporter "I thought the only people from Megadon living on Earth were the expats from the Mighty Mothership Bub-Bah, forced to flee from the orbit of Mars in 1980 after the Schism between Captain LeComte and Lieutenant Curratello!".
The reporter spoke too much.
"I have nothing to do with them" said John Toad. "I came here on my own".
"But how?" asked the reporter.
John Toad shrugged. He knew that question was coming, sooner or later.

John Toad was a good man.
He never in his life beat a woman or a child. He never said lies. He spoke only when he had something to say. After all, he was the last philosopher.
At a time when all the people of Megadon, after seeing the broadcasts of WWII with a huge timelapse, were certain that humanity had committed mass suicide, not everyone turned to science to find a way to save us.
There was a small bunch of people that believed that the spirit is stronger than the brain and, among other things, even faster than light.

John Toad was the first.
He was the first to go, travelling through astral space, covering the infinite distance between Megadon and Earth in a mere heartbeat. Namely, the last heartbeat of John Toad, aged 6, who had just drowned swimming in the creek. One heartbeat. Was all it took.

John Toad was the miracle kid.
But that, fortunately, did not last long. What did last long was his waiting. He waited and waited for his brothers in spirit to join him on Earth. But no one came. By the time the Summer of Love was rolling all over the world, John Toad did the only thing to do. Formed a band.

John Toad could tell no lies.
That's why all the barely audible lyrics of his songs (he was the only songwriter) were small variations on the concept of "Where the f**k are you losers?". The other guys in the band thought John was all about spiritual quest. Instead, he was all about spiritual panic. He was stranded, alone, in a world that had nothing to do with him.

"I eventually did find out what happened to my brothers" John Toad told the reporter, after dinner, in front of a good bottle.
"They were accused of necromancy and high treason. They were all slaughtered. A dark chapter of our history, hidden from knowledge. But Captain LeComte knew".
Captain LeComte! jumped up the reporter. I've been looking for him everywhere!

John Toad met Captain LeComte in 1982, at a Rush concert in Los Angeles.
LeComte had summoned him via telepathy. John Toad had gotten used to telepathic silence since his arrival, but here were people from his home planet! And yet, a planet that had killed his brothers. John Toad had nothing more to do with Megadon.

John Toad liked LeComte.
They had been hearing from each other regularly ever since. "Who is he?" kept asking the reporter. "Who is Captain LeComte?". But no answer came from John Toad. The Black Dwarf had stubbed him to death.

The Black Dwarf, the sole prophet of Goober-Pantheism, renegade scientist from the Ultra-secret Vatican Science Team known only as The Pope SS, had entered the small room like a bat dressed in shadows. What was he after? What did he want?

The reporter won't be able to answer those questions, because after a small physical confrontation, the Black Dwarf slipped away. "You won't escape forever, wretch!" yelled the reporter. "I'll bring my YBG-Men next time!!". And all he could do was kneel down on the dying first alien.

John Toad knew he was dying.
With his last strenght, he clutched to the arms of the reporter.
"Listen", said John Toad. "Captain LeComte is..."
Yes, yes, who is he? Who is Captain LeComte?
"Captain LeComte is... is... Ethan Hawke..."
The yell of the reporter covered John Toad's last breath.
WHAAAAAAAAT??????

:dweez: :smoke: :LOL:

The Black Dwarf? Is that Holierthanthouy? This thread has gone on so long that I can't remember. :wacko:

**H. P. L.** · February 6, 2014

The Yukon Blade Grinder Europe

The Quest for Captain LeComte

Chapter Three: The Ballad of John Toad (A homage to John Steinbeck)

John Toad was a nobody.
The closer he came to rock-stardom was playing in his basement with his buddies, in an all-male garage band deceptively called "The Hot Bitches from Hell".
They even released a debut album in 1969 called "We are Aliens", now a much sought-after rarity for psychedelia junkies and american garage rock collectors.
John Toad was telling the truth.
He was an alien. He came from planet Megadon, and he was something of a pioneer, because he came to Earth in 1962, the first of his kind, all alone.
This puzzled out the reporter.

The reporter also was a nobody.
He worked for a dubious publication based in Goatnut, TN, called "The Yukon Blade Grinder", and was following an even more dubious trail of news that encompassed The Pope, time travel, a new religion called Goober-Pantheism, super heroes, symphonic power metal and said aliens, in a giant effort to make some sense of it all.

John Toad did the smart thing.
In 1970 he cut his hair, started a new regime of "one joint only and after work" and went corporate. When he retired, in 1996, he did what every American dreams to do. He bought a place in the sun.

The reporter, being Italian, knew Tuscany quite well.
But even he was amazed after trespassing the gate of the casolare on the outskirts of the small medieval city of San Gimignano. This was the house of an alien. This was John Toad's world. A world made of brick, wood, sand, mud and crops. John Toad was out in the fields, tending his uliveto, and the reporter had to begrudgingly help him out.

http://www.visitsitaly.com/images/tuscany-im/san_gimignano-im/san_gimignano-panorama.jpg

"Mr Toad" said the reporter "I thought the only people from Megadon living on Earth were the expats from the Mighty Mothership Bub-Bah, forced to flee from the orbit of Mars in 1980 after the Schism between Captain LeComte and Lieutenant Curratello!".
The reporter spoke too much.
"I have nothing to do with them" said John Toad. "I came here on my own".
"But how?" asked the reporter.
John Toad shrugged. He knew that question was coming, sooner or later.

John Toad was a good man.
He never in his life beat a woman or a child. He never said lies. He spoke only when he had something to say. After all, he was the last philosopher.
At a time when all the people of Megadon, after seeing the broadcasts of WWII with a huge timelapse, were certain that humanity had committed mass suicide, not everyone turned to science to find a way to save us.
There was a small bunch of people that believed that the spirit is stronger than the brain and, among other things, even faster than light.

John Toad was the first.
He was the first to go, travelling through astral space, covering the infinite distance between Megadon and Earth in a mere heartbeat. Namely, the last heartbeat of John Toad, aged 6, who had just drowned swimming in the creek. One heartbeat. Was all it took.

John Toad was the miracle kid.
But that, fortunately, did not last long. What did last long was his waiting. He waited and waited for his brothers in spirit to join him on Earth. But no one came. By the time the Summer of Love was rolling all over the world, John Toad did the only thing to do. Formed a band.

John Toad could tell no lies.
That's why all the barely audible lyrics of his songs (he was the only songwriter) were small variations on the concept of "Where the f**k are you losers?". The other guys in the band thought John was all about spiritual quest. Instead, he was all about spiritual panic. He was stranded, alone, in a world that had nothing to do with him.

"I eventually did find out what happened to my brothers" John Toad told the reporter, after dinner, in front of a good bottle.
"They were accused of necromancy and high treason. They were all slaughtered. A dark chapter of our history, hidden from knowledge. But Captain LeComte knew".
Captain LeComte! jumped up the reporter. I've been looking for him everywhere!

John Toad met Captain LeComte in 1982, at a Rush concert in Los Angeles.
LeComte had summoned him via telepathy. John Toad had gotten used to telepathic silence since his arrival, but here were people from his home planet! And yet, a planet that had killed his brothers. John Toad had nothing more to do with Megadon.

John Toad liked LeComte.
They had been hearing from each other regularly ever since. "Who is he?" kept asking the reporter. "Who is Captain LeComte?". But no answer came from John Toad. The Black Dwarf had stubbed him to death.

The Black Dwarf, the sole prophet of Goober-Pantheism, renegade scientist from the Ultra-secret Vatican Science Team known only as The Pope SS, had entered the small room like a bat dressed in shadows. What was he after? What did he want?

The reporter won't be able to answer those questions, because after a small physical confrontation, the Black Dwarf slipped away. "You won't escape forever, wretch!" yelled the reporter. "I'll bring my YBG-Men next time!!". And all he could do was kneel down on the dying first alien.

John Toad knew he was dying.
With his last strenght, he clutched to the arms of the reporter.
"Listen", said John Toad. "Captain LeComte is..."
Yes, yes, who is he? Who is Captain LeComte?
"Captain LeComte is... is... Ethan Hawke..."
The yell of the reporter covered John Toad's last breath.
WHAAAAAAAAT??????

:dweez: :smoke:

The Black Dwarf? Is that Holierthanthouy? This thread has gone on so long that I can't remember.

The very same!

**HomesickAlien** · February 7, 2014

http://i.imgur.com/7knEywh.png

MAN TASED OUTSIDE ROCK STAR'S HOME

Santa Monica

6 Feb 2014

A man was tased and briefly detained this morning after a bizarre scuffle with police outside the home of Neil Peart, drummer for the Canadian band Rush. Authorities responded to a call from the sexagenarian rocker's much younger wife, Carrie Nuttall, who said that a man had fallen off the rear fence into the yard after taking photos of the house with an iPhone.

http://i.imgur.com/9G6XFnk.png?1

Neil Peart's backyard (it really is)

Officers arrived on the scene to find the man, later identified as Yukon Blade Grinder reporter Substancewithoutstyle, wandering aimlessly around the backyard while holding a stuffed llama and babbling incoherently to himself. Santa Monica police officer Dan Bonaduce said that Style was tased after refusing to comply with requests to put down the llama and surrender to police. "He appeared to be intoxicated and became very agitated when we arrived, flailing his arms and ranting something about crop circles and a Salvatore Ferragamo shirt. We had no choice but to tase him." said Bonaduce. He was taken into custody and transferred to the Santa Monica jail.

http://i.imgur.com/HQ2fk95.png?1

Santa Monica Jail

Lieutenant Frank Drebin of the Santa Monica police later said that Style had been on a drinking binge after arriving in Los Angeles from Australia. "From what we can determine, he had been drinking during the entire 13 hour flight from Australia, then he went directly from the airport last night to a place called the Brisbane Bottoms Bar and Grill in Santa Barbara, where he met up with a guy named Kato and continued drinking. At some point in the early morning hours he decided to have Kato drop him off at Peart's residence so he could take a few souvenir pictures."

Drebin said that Nuttall declined to press charges and that Style is expected to be released later this evening. "After he sobers up we'll send him on his way. Hopefully, he'll catch a flight to Toronto and we won't have to deal with him again. He's just a sad reminder of the freaks and losers associated with Rushgoober and the Neverland Cult; I'll sleep better knowing he's left California."

Peart could not be reached for comment and was not home at the time of the incident, although Nuttall confirmed that he is currently on a bike tour of Death Valley, where he is writing his next blog entry, tentatively titled Joshua Trees of the Mojave and why I never admired Larry Mullen, Jr. He is also expected to be a celebrity judge at the junior drumming jamboree at the Boy Scout Camp in Lake Arrowhead before returning home.

**H. P. L.** · February 7, 2014

http://i.imgur.com/7knEywh.png

MAN TASED OUTSIDE ROCK STAR'S HOME

Santa Monica
6 Feb 2014

A man was tased and briefly detained this morning after a bizarre scuffle with police outside the home of Neil Peart, drummer for the Canadian band Rush. Authorities responded to a call from the sexagenarian rocker's much younger wife, Carrie Nuttall, who said that a man had fallen off the rear fence into the yard after taking photos of the house with an iPhone.

http://i.imgur.com/9G6XFnk.png?1
Neil Peart's backyard (it really is)

Officers arrived on the scene to find the man, later identified as Yukon Blade Grinder reporter Substancewithoutstyle, wandering aimlessly around the backyard while holding a stuffed llama and babbling incoherently to himself. Santa Monica police officer Dan Bonaduce said that Style was tased after refusing to comply with requests to put down the llama and surrender to police. "He appeared to be intoxicated and became very agitated when we arrived, flailing his arms and ranting something about crop circles and a Salvatore Ferragamo shirt. We had no choice but to tase him." said Bonaduce. He was taken into custody and transferred to the Santa Monica jail.

http://i.imgur.com/HQ2fk95.png?1
Santa Monica Jail

Lieutenant Frank Drebin of the Santa Monica police later said that Style had been on a drinking binge after arriving in Los Angeles from Australia. "From what we can determine, he had been drinking during the entire 13 hour flight from Australia, then he went directly from the airport last night to a place called the Brisbane Bottoms Bar and Grill in Santa Barbara, where he met up with a guy named Kato and continued drinking. At some point in the early morning hours he decided to have Kato drop him off at Peart's residence so he could take a few souvenir pictures."

Drebin said that Nuttall declined to press charges and that Style is expected to be released later this evening. "After he sobers up we'll send him on his way. Hopefully, he'll catch a flight to Toronto and we won't have to deal with him again. He's just a sad reminder of the freaks and losers associated with Rushgoober and the Neverland Cult; I'll sleep better knowing he's left California."

Peart could not be reached for comment and was not home at the time of the incident, although Nuttall confirmed that he is currently on a bike tour of Death Valley, where he is writing his next blog entry, tentatively titled Joshua Trees of the Mojave and why I never admired Larry Mullen, Jr. He is also expected to be a celebrity judge at the junior drumming jamboree at the Boy Scout Camp in Lake Arrowhead before returning home.

:drool: :drool: :drool: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :goodone: :goodone:

I must say with the greatest respect and love, Substance, that you're really a sucker for punishment!! Has there been a post in this thread in which you weren't arrested, beaten, or molested by creepy hotel managers? You're really a though guy!!!

BTW: nice digs, Neal! I didn't know. Also, that blog entry!! :16ton:

**HomesickAlien** · February 8, 2014

http://i.imgur.com/7knEywh.png

MAN TASED OUTSIDE ROCK STAR'S HOME

Santa Monica
6 Feb 2014

A man was tased and briefly detained this morning after a bizarre scuffle with police outside the home of Neil Peart, drummer for the Canadian band Rush. Authorities responded to a call from the sexagenarian rocker's much younger wife, Carrie Nuttall, who said that a man had fallen off the rear fence into the yard after taking photos of the house with an iPhone.

http://i.imgur.com/9G6XFnk.png?1
Neil Peart's backyard (it really is)

Officers arrived on the scene to find the man, later identified as Yukon Blade Grinder reporter Substancewithoutstyle, wandering aimlessly around the backyard while holding a stuffed llama and babbling incoherently to himself. Santa Monica police officer Dan Bonaduce said that Style was tased after refusing to comply with requests to put down the llama and surrender to police. "He appeared to be intoxicated and became very agitated when we arrived, flailing his arms and ranting something about crop circles and a Salvatore Ferragamo shirt. We had no choice but to tase him." said Bonaduce. He was taken into custody and transferred to the Santa Monica jail.

http://i.imgur.com/HQ2fk95.png?1
Santa Monica Jail

Lieutenant Frank Drebin of the Santa Monica police later said that Style had been on a drinking binge after arriving in Los Angeles from Australia. "From what we can determine, he had been drinking during the entire 13 hour flight from Australia, then he went directly from the airport last night to a place called the Brisbane Bottoms Bar and Grill in Santa Barbara, where he met up with a guy named Kato and continued drinking. At some point in the early morning hours he decided to have Kato drop him off at Peart's residence so he could take a few souvenir pictures."

Drebin said that Nuttall declined to press charges and that Style is expected to be released later this evening. "After he sobers up we'll send him on his way. Hopefully, he'll catch a flight to Toronto and we won't have to deal with him again. He's just a sad reminder of the freaks and losers associated with Rushgoober and the Neverland Cult; I'll sleep better knowing he's left California."

Peart could not be reached for comment and was not home at the time of the incident, although Nuttall confirmed that he is currently on a bike tour of Death Valley, where he is writing his next blog entry, tentatively titled Joshua Trees of the Mojave and why I never admired Larry Mullen, Jr. He is also expected to be a celebrity judge at the junior drumming jamboree at the Boy Scout Camp in Lake Arrowhead before returning home.

:drool: :drool: :drool: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :goodone: :goodone:

I must say with the greatest respect and love, Substance, that you're really a sucker for punishment!! Has there been a post in this thread in which you weren't arrested, beaten, or molested by creepy hotel managers? You're really a though guy!!!

BTW: nice digs, Neal! I didn't know. Also, that blog entry!!

http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys/smiley-sad058.gif

They do seem to have a common theme. Not something I did consciously —at least not at first. :D

I didn't think a Google search for "Neil Peart's House" would turn up much of anything, but there it was.

More pics: http://neilpearthouse.blogspot.com/

**HomesickAlien** · February 10, 2014

First Lorraine, then Tombstone, now H.P.L. :(

Do I get a prize for being the last one to post in this thread?

**Tombstone Mountain** · February 12, 2014

http://i.imgur.com/7knEywh.png

MAN TASED OUTSIDE ROCK STAR'S HOME

Santa Monica
6 Feb 2014

A man was tased and briefly detained this morning after a bizarre scuffle with police outside the home of Neil Peart, drummer for the Canadian band Rush. Authorities responded to a call from the sexagenarian rocker's much younger wife, Carrie Nuttall, who said that a man had fallen off the rear fence into the yard after taking photos of the house with an iPhone.

http://i.imgur.com/9G6XFnk.png?1
Neil Peart's backyard (it really is)

Officers arrived on the scene to find the man, later identified as Yukon Blade Grinder reporter Substancewithoutstyle, wandering aimlessly around the backyard while holding a stuffed llama and babbling incoherently to himself. Santa Monica police officer Dan Bonaduce said that Style was tased after refusing to comply with requests to put down the llama and surrender to police. "He appeared to be intoxicated and became very agitated when we arrived, flailing his arms and ranting something about crop circles and a Salvatore Ferragamo shirt. We had no choice but to tase him." said Bonaduce. He was taken into custody and transferred to the Santa Monica jail.

http://i.imgur.com/HQ2fk95.png?1
Santa Monica Jail

Lieutenant Frank Drebin of the Santa Monica police later said that Style had been on a drinking binge after arriving in Los Angeles from Australia. "From what we can determine, he had been drinking during the entire 13 hour flight from Australia, then he went directly from the airport last night to a place called the Brisbane Bottoms Bar and Grill in Santa Barbara, where he met up with a guy named Kato and continued drinking. At some point in the early morning hours he decided to have Kato drop him off at Peart's residence so he could take a few souvenir pictures."

Drebin said that Nuttall declined to press charges and that Style is expected to be released later this evening. "After he sobers up we'll send him on his way. Hopefully, he'll catch a flight to Toronto and we won't have to deal with him again. He's just a sad reminder of the freaks and losers associated with Rushgoober and the Neverland Cult; I'll sleep better knowing he's left California."

Peart could not be reached for comment and was not home at the time of the incident, although Nuttall confirmed that he is currently on a bike tour of Death Valley, where he is writing his next blog entry, tentatively titled Joshua Trees of the Mojave and why I never admired Larry Mullen, Jr. He is also expected to be a celebrity judge at the junior drumming jamboree at the Boy Scout Camp in Lake Arrowhead before returning home.

:drool: :drool: :drool: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :goodone: :goodone:

I must say with the greatest respect and love, Substance, that you're really a sucker for punishment!! Has there been a post in this thread in which you weren't arrested, beaten, or molested by creepy hotel managers? You're really a though guy!!!

BTW: nice digs, Neal! I didn't know. Also, that blog entry!!

I concur HPL dude is ready for incarceration it seems—much like our beloved Goober

**H. P. L.** · February 12, 2014

First Lorraine, then Tombstone, now H.P.L. :(

Do I get a prize for being the last one to post in this thread?

No, you get the "Half empty glass in a rainy day" award presented by Suicidal Tendencies.

I'm cooking up an interview with Julie Delpy, how cool is that? But you know, ladies require time, tenderness... (plus, I got work to do...)

**ThatLightInYourEyes** · February 12, 2014

http://i.imgur.com/7knEywh.png

MAN TASED OUTSIDE ROCK STAR'S HOME

Santa Monica
6 Feb 2014

A man was tased and briefly detained this morning after a bizarre scuffle with police outside the home of Neil Peart, drummer for the Canadian band Rush. Authorities responded to a call from the sexagenarian rocker's much younger wife, Carrie Nuttall, who said that a man had fallen off the rear fence into the yard after taking photos of the house with an iPhone.

http://i.imgur.com/9G6XFnk.png?1
Neil Peart's backyard (it really is)

Officers arrived on the scene to find the man, later identified as Yukon Blade Grinder reporter Substancewithoutstyle, wandering aimlessly around the backyard while holding a stuffed llama and babbling incoherently to himself. Santa Monica police officer Dan Bonaduce said that Style was tased after refusing to comply with requests to put down the llama and surrender to police. "He appeared to be intoxicated and became very agitated when we arrived, flailing his arms and ranting something about crop circles and a Salvatore Ferragamo shirt. We had no choice but to tase him." said Bonaduce. He was taken into custody and transferred to the Santa Monica jail.

http://i.imgur.com/HQ2fk95.png?1
Santa Monica Jail

Lieutenant Frank Drebin of the Santa Monica police later said that Style had been on a drinking binge after arriving in Los Angeles from Australia. "From what we can determine, he had been drinking during the entire 13 hour flight from Australia, then he went directly from the airport last night to a place called the Brisbane Bottoms Bar and Grill in Santa Barbara, where he met up with a guy named Kato and continued drinking. At some point in the early morning hours he decided to have Kato drop him off at Peart's residence so he could take a few souvenir pictures."

Drebin said that Nuttall declined to press charges and that Style is expected to be released later this evening. "After he sobers up we'll send him on his way. Hopefully, he'll catch a flight to Toronto and we won't have to deal with him again. He's just a sad reminder of the freaks and losers associated with Rushgoober and the Neverland Cult; I'll sleep better knowing he's left California."

Peart could not be reached for comment and was not home at the time of the incident, although Nuttall confirmed that he is currently on a bike tour of Death Valley, where he is writing his next blog entry, tentatively titled Joshua Trees of the Mojave and why I never admired Larry Mullen, Jr. He is also expected to be a celebrity judge at the junior drumming jamboree at the Boy Scout Camp in Lake Arrowhead before returning home.

:drool: :drool: :drool: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :laughing guy: :goodone: :goodone:

I must say with the greatest respect and love, Substance, that you're really a sucker for punishment!! Has there been a post in this thread in which you weren't arrested, beaten, or molested by creepy hotel managers? You're really a though guy!!!

BTW: nice digs, Neal! I didn't know. Also, that blog entry!!

http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys/smiley-sad058.gif
They do seem to have a common theme. Not something I did consciously —at least not at first. :D

I didn't think a Google search for "Neil Peart's House" would turn up much of anything, but there it was.
More pics: http://neilpearthouse.blogspot.com/

I saw the above house pic during one of my searches for Rush members' pics to turn into funny Photoshops. I thought, "Why do I keep getting this damn house in my search results?" Nice to know some model citizen out there made an actual blog out of pictures of someone's residence. Time for land mines, maybe?

TRF Prediction Thread and Roast: Rushgoober's 30,000th post

You know he's planning on something to document the occasion 24 members have voted

1. What will his thread topic be?

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You know he's planning on something to document the occasion
24 members have voted