owlswing Posted March 5, 2007 Share Posted March 5, 2007 QUOTE (Cygnus @ Mar 5 2007, 10:51 AM) A young woman was taking an afternoon nap. After she woke up, she told her husband, "I just dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine's day. What do you think it means?" "You'll know tonight." he said. That evening, the man came home with a small package and gave it to his wife. Delighted, she opened it-- only to find a book entitled "The meaning of dreams". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GhostGirl Posted March 5, 2007 Share Posted March 5, 2007 QUOTE (Daylin @ Mar 2 2007, 12:10 PM) QUOTE (Arleen2112 @ Mar 2 2007, 08:34 AM) QUOTE (ladirushfan80 @ Mar 2 2007, 09:32 AM)i wonder how long it will be before asian rush fan chimes in???? just sayin'... I was just thinking the same thing Me three He'll have to deal with me if he does. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Finbar Posted March 5, 2007 Share Posted March 5, 2007 I'm not a pig. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blonde77th Posted March 5, 2007 Share Posted March 5, 2007 QUOTE (Finbar @ Mar 5 2007, 12:17 PM) I'm not a pig. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cygnus Posted March 5, 2007 Share Posted March 5, 2007 QUOTE (Finbar @ Mar 5 2007, 01:17 PM) I'm not a pig. Not Yet Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Finbar Posted March 5, 2007 Share Posted March 5, 2007 QUOTE (Cygnus @ Mar 5 2007, 01:09 PM) QUOTE (Finbar @ Mar 5 2007, 01:17 PM) I'm not a pig. Not Yet You're awfully presumptuous. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Groovybass77 Posted March 5, 2007 Share Posted March 5, 2007 This reminds me of an Email i got from my Aunt: Difference Between Women And Men 1.NAMES If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara. If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy. 2.EATING OUT When the bill arrives, Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom will each throw in a $20 even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back. When the women get their bill, out come the pocket calculators. 3.MONEY A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need, but it's on sale. 4.BATHROOMS A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Marriott. The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these items. 5.ARGUMENTS A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that... is the beginning of a new argument. 6.CATS Women love cats. Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats. 7.FUTURE A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. 8.SUCCESS A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. 9.MARRIAGE A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does. 10.DRESSING UP A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail. A man will dress up for weddings and funerals. 11.NATURAL Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night. 12.OFFSPRING Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams. A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house 13.THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Any married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing. AND FINALLY.... A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, jack asses, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?" "Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
daveyt Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 QUOTE (Finbar @ Mar 5 2007, 11:33 AM) QUOTE (Cygnus @ Mar 5 2007, 01:09 PM) QUOTE (Finbar @ Mar 5 2007, 01:17 PM) I'm not a pig. Not Yet You're awfully presumptuous. find your inner pig, finbar Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cygnus Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 QUOTE (daveyt @ Mar 5 2007, 08:50 PM) QUOTE (Finbar @ Mar 5 2007, 11:33 AM) QUOTE (Cygnus @ Mar 5 2007, 01:09 PM) QUOTE (Finbar @ Mar 5 2007, 01:17 PM) I'm not a pig. Not Yet You're awfully presumptuous. find your inner pig, finbar http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v703/RushForum/26852739N00.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
owlswing Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 QUOTE (Groovybass77 @ Mar 5 2007, 04:38 PM)This reminds me of an Email i got from my Aunt: Difference Between Women And Men 1.NAMES If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara. If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy. 2.EATING OUT When the bill arrives, Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom will each throw in a $20 even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back. When the women get their bill, out come the pocket calculators. 3.MONEY A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need, but it's on sale. 4.BATHROOMS A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Marriott. The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these items. 5.ARGUMENTS A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that... is the beginning of a new argument. 6.CATS Women love cats. Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats. 7.FUTURE A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. 8.SUCCESS A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. 9.MARRIAGE A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does. 10.DRESSING UP A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail. A man will dress up for weddings and funerals. 11.NATURAL Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night. 12.OFFSPRING Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams. A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house 13.THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Any married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing. AND FINALLY.... A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, jack asses, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?" "Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws." Our Aunt's think a like...mine sent me this a few weeks ago. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cygnus Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 Q: What is that insensitive part at the base of the penis called? A: The man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
steelcaressed Posted March 7, 2007 Share Posted March 7, 2007 QUOTE (Cygnus @ Feb 27 2007, 04:47 PM) "Advice for office managers: If you keep the sexual harassment complaint forms in the bottom drawer, then when a woman goes to get one out you'll get a great view of her ass." This was the only one I found truly funny here. I know what category of farm animal I belong in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladirushfan80 Posted March 7, 2007 Share Posted March 7, 2007 http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v415/amandaladi/cartoons%20and%20fun/malcolmgattgallery4.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GhostGirl Posted March 7, 2007 Share Posted March 7, 2007 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
owlswing Posted March 7, 2007 Share Posted March 7, 2007 Excellent Picture Ladi Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladirushfan80 Posted March 8, 2007 Share Posted March 8, 2007 http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v415/amandaladi/cartoons%20and%20fun/0758202857_01__AA240_SCLZZZZZZZ_.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cygnus Posted March 8, 2007 Share Posted March 8, 2007 Touch'e Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cygnus Posted March 8, 2007 Share Posted March 8, 2007 Try not to get busted Great Game Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladirushfan80 Posted March 8, 2007 Share Posted March 8, 2007 QUOTE (Cygnus @ Mar 8 2007, 03:47 PM) Try not to get busted Great Game Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
owlswing Posted March 8, 2007 Share Posted March 8, 2007 QUOTE (Cygnus @ Mar 8 2007, 03:47 PM) Try not to get busted Great Game Interesting Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom Sawyer Posted March 8, 2007 Author Share Posted March 8, 2007 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
owlswing Posted March 9, 2007 Share Posted March 9, 2007 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blonde77th Posted March 9, 2007 Share Posted March 9, 2007 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cygnus Posted March 14, 2007 Share Posted March 14, 2007 Oh, The Good Old Days http://newmedia.funnyjunk.com/pictures/battleshipsforbotys.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
porthleven's rose Posted March 14, 2007 Share Posted March 14, 2007 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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