Jump to content

Men!


DonnaWanna
 Share

Recommended Posts

QUOTE (Geddy's Gal @ Oct 29 2005, 08:57 AM)
A friend of mine in New Zealand sent me this photo of a new men's loo at Sofitel in Queenstown NZ.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v640/Geddygal1/Jokes/SofitelLoo3.jpg

Could inhibit the natural process, don't you think !!! unsure.gif

gg

That is too funny rofl3.gif

 

I have a friend in NZ -- she sends me the most wonderful landscape pictures -- plan on going there in 2 years smile.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

He makes me smile smile.gif

http://img240.imageshack.us/img240/6964/colinclose8tw.jpg

drool1.gif

http://img240.imageshack.us/img240/562/colinspitsbeer5bk.jpg

yes.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

K so....when the Tp looks like its runnin low and has bout 1 or 2 more uses from the roll, I put a new fresh roll on the back on the toilet bowl, So when the old roll is done with Ur not stuck on the bowl with a empty roll,

Silly ME..thinkin itll even get replaced..But WTF was i thinkin rage.gif

 

this is what i find instead sarcasm.gif

http://img499.imageshack.us/img499/2848/p10100744ij.jpg

 

I mean ..How freeeckin hard is it to put the new roll on?? ur sittin there anyway.

 

 

So im leavin it like that and wonderin whats gonna happen once that roll is empty & time to get a new roll out unsure.gif

 

 

Edited by DonnaWanna
Link to comment
Share on other sites

A husband was in big trouble when he forgot his wedding anniversary.

His wife told him "Tomorrow there better be something in the driveway for me that goes zero to 200 in 2 seconds flat."

The next morning the wife found a small package in the driveway. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.

Funeral arrangements for the husband have been set for Saturday.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Bwahaha!!! Where do you come up with these, Cyg?
Link to comment
Share on other sites

She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.

Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.

Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.

Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.

And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.

 

WOMEN'S REVENGE

"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the

woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet

I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.

"So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked.

"No," she replied, " but my husband refused to come

shopping with me, and I figured this was the most

evil thing I could do to him legally."

 

UNDERSTANDING WOMEN (A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)

 

I know I'm not going to understand women.

I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax

pour it onto your upper thigh,

rip the hair out by the root,

and still be afraid of a spider.

 

MARRIAGE SEMINAR

 

While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with

communication, Tom and his wife Grace listened to the

instructor, "It is essential that husbands and wives know

the things that are important to each other."

He addressed the man,

"Can you describe your wife's favorite flower?"

Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and

whispered, "It's Pillsbury, isn't it?

The rest of the story gets rather ugly, so I'll stop right here.

 

CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS

 

A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down

the aisles. The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can

help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of

tampons for his wife. She directs him down the correct

aisle. A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton

balls and a ball of string on the counter.

She says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for

some tampons for your wife?

He answers, " You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent

my wife to the store to get me a carton of cigarettes,

and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling

papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo-ooo much cheaper.

So, I figure if I have to roll my own ............ so does she.

( I figure this guy is the one on the milk carton! )

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

QUOTE
WOMEN'S REVENGE
"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the
woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet
I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.
"So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked.
"No," she replied, " but my husband refused to come
shopping with me, and I figured this was the most
evil thing I could do to him legally."

 

laugh.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

QUOTE (Cygnus @ Nov 28 2005, 08:48 AM)
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v703/RushForum/unknown.jpg

hhhmmmm...

learn something new every day....

Link to comment
Share on other sites

QUOTE (ladirushfan80 @ Jun 20 2005, 06:40 AM)
FINE

This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.


FIVE MINUTES


If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.



NOTHING

This is the calm before the storm. This means "something," and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with 'Nothing' usually end in "Fine"


GO AHEAD


This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it.



LOUD SIGH


This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing"


THAT'S OKAY

This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

THANKS

A woman is thanking you. Do not question it or faint. Just say you're welcome.


WHATEVER
It's a woman's way of saying *!#@ YOU!

I realize that ive have rarely posted on this board....and i am a vey big RUSH fan! but as soon as i read this i had to say that it is so true....alarmingly true...in fact i wish i had read these a few years ago.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

doh.gif

 

my husband doesn't even answer the phone...

forget about messages!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The teacher asked little Johnny if he knows his numbers.

"Yes," he said. "I do. My father taught me."

"Good. What comes after three."

"Four," answers the boy.

 

"What comes after six?"

"Seven."

"Very good," says the teacher. "Your dad did a good job. What comes

after ten?"

 

"A jack," says the kid.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

QUOTE (Cygnus @ Dec 15 2005, 11:12 AM)
The teacher asked little Johnny if he knows his numbers.
"Yes," he said. "I do. My father taught me."
"Good. What comes after three."
"Four," answers the boy.

"What comes after six?"
"Seven."
"Very good," says the teacher. "Your dad did a good job. What comes
after ten?"

"A jack," says the kid.

laugh.gif tongue.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

WHY CHRISTMAS TREES ARE BETTER THAN MEN

 

 

 

 

1. A Christmas tree is always erect.

 

2. Even small ones give satisfaction.

 

3. A Christmas tree stays up for 12 days and nights.

 

4. A Christmas tree always looks good - even when it's lit.

 

5. A Christmas tree is always happy with its size.

 

6. A Christmas tree has cute balls.

 

7. A Christmas tree doesn't get mad if you break one of its balls.

 

8. You can throw a Christmas tree out when it wears out.

 

9. You don't have to put up with a Christmas tree all year.

 

10. You only have to feed/water it once a week.

 

11. It's always there to light up your life.

 

12. It gets turned on only when you want it turned on.

 

13. It always smells nice and doesn't pass gas.

 

14. If it needles you,you can toss it out.

 

15.It doesn't ask you to have little Christmas trees.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
 Share

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...