sundog Posted September 10, 2005 Share Posted September 10, 2005 A woman enrolled in nursing school was attending an anatomy class. The subject of the day was involuntary muscles. The instructor, hoping to perk up the students a bit, asked the woman, "Do you know what your a**hole does when you're having an orgasm?" "Sure" she said, "He's at home, taking care of the kids." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sundog Posted September 10, 2005 Share Posted September 10, 2005 He said....I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it. She said....You wear pants don't you? He said......shall we try swapping positions tonight? She said.....That's a good idea...you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart! He said....what have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you? She said.....Turn sideways and look in the mirror! He said....How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? She said.....We don't know...it has never happened. He said....Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good looking? She said.....They already have boyfriends. He said...What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is? She said.....a widow. He said....why are married women heavier than single women? She said....single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peifer21 Posted September 10, 2005 Share Posted September 10, 2005 (edited) not all men are like this. many woman, i say of about equal amount. are like this too. Edited September 10, 2005 by peifer21 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sundog Posted September 10, 2005 Share Posted September 10, 2005 QUOTE (peifer21 @ Sep 10 2005, 12:22 PM) not all men are like this. many woman, i say of about equal amount. are like this too. Nope - You're right. It's a generalization, for sure, but a funny one at that! Lighten Up! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Man Posted September 10, 2005 Share Posted September 10, 2005 A newly marreid couple were in the bedroom on their first night of marriage. The husband wanted to set things straight from the outset. He told his new bride, "Honey put on my pants." She pulled them up, but they were too large & fell down. She said "I can't wear your pants." He repliled "That's right & don't you forget it, I wear the pants in this family." So she asked him to put on her panties. He picked them up & tried to put them on but they were too small. He told her "Honey, I can't get into your panties." She said to him "That's right, & if you don't change your attitude, you never will." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sundog Posted September 10, 2005 Share Posted September 10, 2005 QUOTE (Digital Man @ Sep 10 2005, 12:33 PM) A newly marreid couple were in the bedroom on their first night of marriage. The husband wanted to set things straight from the outset. He told his new bride, "Honey put on my pants." She pulled them up, but they were too large & fell down. She said "I can't wear your pants." He repliled "That's right & don't you forget it, I wear the pants in this family." So she asked him to put on her panties. He picked them up & tried to put them on but they were too small. He told her "Honey, I can't get into your panties." She said to him "That's right, & if you don't change your attitude, you never will." That's right! Don't you forget it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Man Posted September 10, 2005 Share Posted September 10, 2005 QUOTE (sundog @ Sep 10 2005, 09:34 AM)QUOTE (Digital Man @ Sep 10 2005, 12:33 PM) A newly marreid couple were in the bedroom on their first night of marriage. The husband wanted to set things straight from the outset. He told his new bride, "Honey put on my pants." She pulled them up, but they were too large & fell down. She said "I can't wear your pants." He repliled "That's right & don't you forget it, I wear the pants in this family." So she asked him to put on her panties. He picked them up & tried to put them on but they were too small. He told her "Honey, I can't get into your panties." She said to him "That's right, & if you don't change your attitude, you never will." That's right! Don't you forget it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sundog Posted September 10, 2005 Share Posted September 10, 2005 QUOTE (Digital Man @ Sep 10 2005, 12:50 PM) QUOTE (sundog @ Sep 10 2005, 09:34 AM)QUOTE (Digital Man @ Sep 10 2005, 12:33 PM) A newly marreid couple were in the bedroom on their first night of marriage. The husband wanted to set things straight from the outset. He told his new bride, "Honey put on my pants." She pulled them up, but they were too large & fell down. She said "I can't wear your pants." He repliled "That's right & don't you forget it, I wear the pants in this family." So she asked him to put on her panties. He picked them up & tried to put them on but they were too small. He told her "Honey, I can't get into your panties." She said to him "That's right, & if you don't change your attitude, you never will." That's right! Don't you forget it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DonnaWanna Posted September 10, 2005 Author Share Posted September 10, 2005 QUOTE (sundog @ Sep 10 2005, 12:34 PM) QUOTE (Digital Man @ Sep 10 2005, 12:33 PM) A newly marreid couple were in the bedroom on their first night of marriage. The husband wanted to set things straight from the outset. He told his new bride, "Honey put on my pants." She pulled them up, but they were too large & fell down. She said "I can't wear your pants." He repliled "That's right & don't you forget it, I wear the pants in this family." So she asked him to put on her panties. He picked them up & tried to put them on but they were too small. He told her "Honey, I can't get into your panties." She said to him "That's right, & if you don't change your attitude, you never will." That's right! Don't you forget it! Ewww a Man tryin on womans panties thats just NOT right ...must get mental image outta my head..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barney_rebel Posted September 11, 2005 Share Posted September 11, 2005 http://www.therushforum.com/index.php?show...ndpost&p=280189 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rushengal Posted September 11, 2005 Share Posted September 11, 2005 QUOTE (barney_rebel @ Sep 11 2005, 06:32 PM) http://www.therushforum.com/index.php?show...ndpost&p=280189 Nice Barney, sitting there reading while your wife does the lawn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cygnus Posted September 14, 2005 Share Posted September 14, 2005 http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v703/RushForum/1293293.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1-0-0-1-0-0-1 Posted September 14, 2005 Share Posted September 14, 2005 QUOTE (rushengal @ Sep 11 2005, 06:34 PM) QUOTE (barney_rebel @ Sep 11 2005, 06:32 PM) http://www.therushforum.com/index.php?show...ndpost&p=280189 Nice Barney, sitting there reading while your wife does the lawn Nice Barney, sitting there reading while your wife does the lawn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geddy's Gal Posted September 16, 2005 Share Posted September 16, 2005 A man asked his wife what she'd like for her birthday??? "I'd love to be eight again." she replied. On the morning of her birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl of Coco Pops, and then took her off to the local theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park: the DeathSlide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Monster Roller Coaster, everything there was. Five hours later she staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down. Right away, they journeyed to a McDonald's where her loving husband ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a refreshing chocolate shake. Then it was off to the movies: the latest StarWars epic, a hot dog, popcorn, all the Coke she could drink, and her favourite lolly and M&M's. What a fabulous adventure! Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed exhausted. He leaned over his precious wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, "Well, Honey, what was it like being eight again?" Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed. "I meant my dress size, you f***ing idiot" The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he's gonna get it wrong! gg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geddy's Gal Posted September 19, 2005 Share Posted September 19, 2005 Five tips for a woman.... 1. It is important that a man helps you around the house and has a job. 2. It is important that a man makes you laugh. 3. It is important to find a man you can count on and doesn't lie to you. 4. It is important that a man loves you and spoils you. 5. It is important that these four men don't know each other !!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sundog Posted September 19, 2005 Share Posted September 19, 2005 QUOTE (Geddy's Gal @ Sep 19 2005, 07:35 AM) Five tips for a woman.... 1. It is important that a man helps you around the house and has a job. 2. It is important that a man makes you laugh. 3. It is important to find a man you can count on and doesn't lie to you. 4. It is important that a man loves you and spoils you. 5. It is important that these four men don't know each other !!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daylin Posted September 19, 2005 Share Posted September 19, 2005 QUOTE (sundog @ Sep 19 2005, 06:55 AM) QUOTE (Geddy's Gal @ Sep 19 2005, 07:35 AM) Five tips for a woman.... 1. It is important that a man helps you around the house and has a job. 2. It is important that a man makes you laugh. 3. It is important to find a man you can count on and doesn't lie to you. 4. It is important that a man loves you and spoils you. 5. It is important that these four men don't know each other !!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Man Posted September 19, 2005 Share Posted September 19, 2005 QUOTE (sundog @ Sep 19 2005, 04:55 AM) QUOTE (Geddy's Gal @ Sep 19 2005, 07:35 AM) Five tips for a woman.... 1. It is important that a man helps you around the house and has a job. 2. It is important that a man makes you laugh. 3. It is important to find a man you can count on and doesn't lie to you. 4. It is important that a man loves you and spoils you. 5. It is important that these four men don't know each other !!! Oh yeah, that's just freakin' hilarious.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drumnut Posted September 19, 2005 Share Posted September 19, 2005 QUOTE (Geddy's Gal @ Sep 19 2005, 03:35 AM)Five tips for a woman.... 1. It is important that a man helps you around the house and has a job. 2. It is important that a man makes you laugh. 3. It is important to find a man you can count on and doesn't lie to you. 4. It is important that a man loves you and spoils you. 5. It is important that these four men don't know each other !!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geddy's Gal Posted September 20, 2005 Share Posted September 20, 2005 http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v640/Geddygal1/Jokes/Birdsnbees.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladirushfan80 Posted September 20, 2005 Share Posted September 20, 2005 QUOTE (Geddy's Gal @ Sep 20 2005, 07:16 AM) http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v640/Geddygal1/Jokes/Birdsnbees.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
debe Posted October 3, 2005 Share Posted October 3, 2005 Men---can't live with them, can't shoot them legally. Or my house would be carpeted with wall-to-wall manskin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alsgalpal Posted October 3, 2005 Share Posted October 3, 2005 QUOTE (debe @ Oct 3 2005, 03:20 AM) Men---can't live with them, can't shoot them legally. Or my house would be carpeted with wall-to-wall manskin. Debe!!!!!! Glad to have you back!!!!! Where the 'eck ya been??? I miss ya! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cygnus Posted October 3, 2005 Share Posted October 3, 2005 New Sex Study It has been determined, the most used sexual position for married couples is a doggie position. http://www.goodlaughter.com/pics/sex-study.jpg The husband sits up and begs. The wife rolls over and plays dead... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
debe Posted October 4, 2005 Share Posted October 4, 2005 QUOTE (Alsgalpal @ Oct 3 2005, 08:42 AM)QUOTE (debe @ Oct 3 2005, 03:20 AM) Men---can't live with them, can't shoot them legally. Or my house would be carpeted with wall-to-wall manskin. Debe!!!!!! Glad to have you back!!!!! Where the 'eck ya been??? I miss ya! You've heard of "Purgatory", right? Near there, very near there. Just...warmer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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