*Limelight* Posted April 11, 2011 Share Posted April 11, 2011 No-longer one of the more how would I say it.. prominent members around here as some of the older ones may remember I still do stalk around but that's not the point of this. I don't get how sometimes in life we get these odd/good/terrible coincidences case in fact last year and this weekend: As either none or very few of you know I do go on a separate forum (blasphemy I know) and last year I met someone (online @ that forum) who now is far and beyond everyone else in being my best friend. They live about 4 hours from me and thx to gas prices work and everything we rarely get to meet in person. And we had the chance to meet last year about this same time, so we're both super excited the day comes and her (ya her) grandmother gets admitted to the hospital and ultimately dies the next day or the day after. My friend and I both terribly upset over everything that went on didn't talk for a bit after that due to some stuff that went on, anyways I met them later that summer and it was wonderful. So this year comes around and again we're both super excited to see each other for only the 2nd time now (but based on how much we talk and everything you could swear we grew up together) and we did meet on friday and had a wonderful time it was the happiest I had been in awhile to see them again talk chat just enjoy being around them. Anyways, after not being able to get a hold of em I come back home to see that this time her grandfather died. And I can't help but just wondering why/how this stuff happens like that 2 years in a row? I haven't been able to sleep all day (I work graveyards) or get a hold of em (I gave up now gonna let her cool off for 2 weeks or so) It's almost to the day (about 372 days really) since her grandmother died and now her grandfather too just as I come to visit. In hindsight if anyone actually reads anything I can imagine how silly it sounds to get all upset over something like this when it doesn't "directly" involve me. But in just over a year that I've known this girl I've grown to love her as a friend beyond words and just ya.. Thoughts/comments/trolls? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HowItIs Posted April 11, 2011 Share Posted April 11, 2011 I'd like to know, too. There was a run of about 24 months of things like that in my life. It only started to turn around last summer. If, indeed, it has done so. Something Neil wrote (in one of his essays on his site, IIRC) is that a person who has lost someone suddenly will obsess that it can happen again at any time. After my Mom died, I remember feeling exactly that way - wanting to not have the future coming at me. So, why does it happen? I know you expect this, being TRF is a Rush website but... because it happens. Really, I don't think that there is any great plan or pre-destination or someone pulling the strings. Chaos is the true ruler of the Universe and she just does her thing and it's left to us to deal with it. My deepest condolences to your friends. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ghost of a Rider Posted April 11, 2011 Share Posted April 11, 2011 I suspect you already know the answer but knowing the answer as to why certain events occur is no comfort when we start getting overwhelmed by them. In fact, I would say that coming here and simply asking the question is a form of coping mechanism. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Limelight* Posted April 11, 2011 Author Share Posted April 11, 2011 It really is Ghost, I'm not one to say otherwise. I just remember what the forum used to be when we could post like this and get more then 2 responses to 55 views. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Running Rebel Posted April 11, 2011 Share Posted April 11, 2011 Okay, so being rather newish and hanging out in another section, perhaps you could fill us in on more details. I mean Ghost stated the obvious and it sucks to have such coincidences happen both times, but I can't really get what's going on otherwise. Is this a love interest? You say "see them" so is it a couple you are friends with? What is so awesome about the friendship- is it a Rush interest, political, social, sexual or other similar interests. Give us some more and I'm sure you'll have alot more comments. There's plenty of opinion and gossip around here from what I can tell Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnnyBlaze Posted April 12, 2011 Share Posted April 12, 2011 QUOTE (*Limelight* @ Apr 12 2011, 01:33 AM) It really is Ghost, I'm not one to say otherwise. I just remember what the forum used to be when we could post like this and get more then 2 responses to 55 views. Actually, I do remember posts like this that got the same kind of (lack of)response. People generally won't reply if there's something deep/serious from someone they don't know [you said yourself that you haven't been around lately]. Also, as you know, your question has no true answer and trying to find one will make you go crazy or have insomnia. Being rational about your friend's grandparents, it is somewhat common for an elderly widow or widower to pass away within a year of their beloved's death. I'm sure we can find biological or some kind of scientific reason for this but even my mind tells me it's a matter of the heart. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ancient Ways Posted April 12, 2011 Share Posted April 12, 2011 QUOTE (*Limelight* @ Apr 11 2011, 12:33 PM) It really is Ghost, I'm not one to say otherwise. I just remember what the forum used to be when we could post like this and get more then 2 responses to 55 views. I'll be honest with you, I had to read your post three times to make sense of it. Maybe the others just didn't feel like taking the time. But, yeah, the forum has changed many times since I have been here. I think it's great that you have found a good friend (maybe more?) and hopefully every time you meet up it won;t automatically dredge up memories of the unfortunate deaths of their grandparents. Best of luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Not Posted April 12, 2011 Share Posted April 12, 2011 Well that stinks, but obviously old people are prone to death.. The title "Why do things like they do?" is a funny question actually.. No one knows, and everyone has an unbelievable experience at some point (can't say that's happened to me yet), some more extreme than others.. Life is strange, that's the best answer for that question.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tommy Sawyer Posted April 12, 2011 Share Posted April 12, 2011 As everyone else has said, there's no real reason. It was just their time to go. There's no point in worrying about it. Someday, you'll be gone, too. It's just a fact of life Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Good,bad,andrush Posted April 12, 2011 Share Posted April 12, 2011 Not trying to be funny here or anything, and my deepest condolences, but...speaking seriously... Why do they happen? Because they happen. Roll the bones. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1 of the 7 Posted April 12, 2011 Share Posted April 12, 2011 I certainly can't answer the why (I'd be phenomenally powerful if I could), but look at the positive...each time something bad happened to your friend, you were there to support (even though the person may not be able to talk right now, the good memories you just shared will give strength). Also, if you can get through the hard times up front, it will give you confidence that you can face anything. Still, I hope your third meeting is a charm and all good things happen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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