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Just for fun


Digital Man
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A young boy went to his father and asked, "Dad, what's the difference between theory and reality?"

"Well, son, the best way to explain this is a practical exercise. Go ask your Mom if she'd sleep with a stranger for a million dollars and come tell me her answer."

 

The boy returned and said, " She said she would, Dad." "OK," replied the father, "Go ask your sister the same question."

 

The boy returned and said that his sister also answered "yes" to the question and then asked his Dad, "What's this got to do with theory and reality?"

 

"It's simple, son. In theory, we live with millionaires. In reality, we live with a couple of sluts."

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Dumb Men Jokes

 

Q:Why do men have to flex their muscles around women so much?

A:Because they have nothing else to brag about.

 

Q:What is the best way to get a man to stop pestering you?

A:Stare at his crotch and laugh.

 

Q:Why do men never stop to ask for directions?

A:Because they aren't lost, they just don't know where they are.

 

Q:If a man speaks in the forest and there is no woman to hear him, is he still wrong?

A:YES!!!

 

Why do men think they're so superior if they have to become men while women just are?

 

3 ways to have fun with men:

1.tell him that this girl he likes wants a kiss

2.take out the batteries on the remote and then tell him that a Football game is on

3.wait till the first two are complete, then innocently tell him that you thought he knew better.

 

Submitted by Proudly Female

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why do men have slits in their underware? so they can get oxygen to their brains

 

 

 

What did god say after he made Adam?

"I can do better than that." then he made Eve.

 

 

What do you call a man with half a brain?

Gifted

 

 

How can you tell if a man is sexually active?

He's breathing!

 

 

A man is trying to impress a woman by making her think he's really intelligent.

Man: I like waking early in the morning.

Woman: Are you sure you haven't missed an "n" out of that sentence?

 

Q: Do you know the real reason Moses wandered in the desert for 40 years?

A: Because even back then men wouldn't stop and ask for directions.

 

 

Why do women work harder than men?

Women get it done right the first time.

 

why don't men do laundry?

cause the washer and dryer don't run on remote control!

 

One day, God calls on Adam & says, "Adam, I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that I gave you a penis and a brain. The bad news is that I only gave you enough blood to operate one organ at a time."

 

 

Why is urine yellow and sperm white?

So men can tell if they are coming or going.

 

 

 

 

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The Difference Between Men and Women - Haircuts

 

Women's Version:

 

Woman 2: Oh! You got a haircut! That's so cute!

 

Woman 1: Do you think so? I wasn't sure when she gave me the mirror. I

mean, you don't think it's too fluffy looking?

 

Woman 2: Oh Gosh no! No, it's perfect. I'd love to get my hair cut like

that, but I think my face is too wide. I'm pretty much stuck with this

stuff,

I'm afraid.

 

Woman 1: Are you serious? I think your face is adorable. And you could

easily get one of those layer cuts--that would look so cute I think. I was

actually going to do that except that I was afraid it would accent my long

neck.

 

Woman 2: Oh--that's funny! I would love to have your neck! Anything to take

attention away from this two-by-four I have for a shoulder line.

 

Woman 1: Are you kidding? I know girls that would love to have your

shoulders. Everything drapes so well on you. I mean, look at my arms--see

how short they are? If I had your shoulders I could get clothes to fit me

so much easier.

 

 

 

Men's Version:

 

Man 2: Haircut?

 

Man 1: Yeah

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The Line Got Just Got Longer

 

Girls' room his, too

 

Transgender men free to use ALL of MTA's loos

 

BY PETE DONOHUE

DAILY NEWS STAFF WRITER

 

 

Helena Stone, formerly Henry McGuinness, stands her ground yesterday outside Grand Central Terminal's ladies' room, which can now be used by transgender men.

 

 

The line for the girls' room just got longer.

 

Men who live as women can now legally use women's rest rooms in New York's transit system under an unprecedented deal revealed yesterday.

 

The Metropolitan Transportation Authority agreed to allow riders to use MTA rest rooms "consistent with their gender expression," the Transgender Legal Defense and Education Fund announced yesterday.

 

The group filed a complaint against the MTA on behalf of a 70-year-old telephone repair technician who was arrested for using the women's room at Grand Central Terminal.

 

The technician, who is assigned to the terminal by Verizon, was born Henry McGuinness but now goes by Helena Stone.

 

"I'm a 24-hour woman," Stone declared proudly. "I just feel like a woman and I like to wear women's clothes."

 

The MTA would not comment on the settlement but Stone's lawyer said it also includes mandatory transgender sensitivity training for MTA employees and a $2,000 payment to the technician for legal fees.

 

Michael Sullivan, Stone's lawyer, called the settlement of the complaint with the Human Rights Commission a "milestone" toward recognition of the city law that prohibits discrimination against transgender men and women.

 

But some Metro-North riders at Grand Central yesterday were stunned by the ruling.

 

"I would not like that," said Gloria David, a retiree from Connecticut. "I have nothing against gay men or drag queens, but they can use the men's room. I just don't want to go to the bathroom next to a man."

 

One rider feared predators might dress as women and lurk in the women's room.

 

But Rena Gantz, 23, a college student, shrugged off the settlement.

 

"It doesn't bother me because it is a reality," she said. "If they believe they are women, they should be treated as one."

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