Looking for Bassist in Detroit Area

[the masked drummer]

Here's the deal: Our band is about to break and we need a bassist. We sent out two demos to Virgin and Def Jam and both labels called back and are interested. Virgin, if signed, will spend between 5-7 million dollars to promote us immediately. We have a cover song that is a hit, according to every radio program director, producer and executive that's heard it. We have about 15 original songs in the works and are writing new ones constantly. The style varies between rock/metal/alternative/funk/techno/industrial/progressive. Basically, we've got some fun tunes. The lead guitarist is 12 years old and is the only reason why the labels are so interested. He's very gifted and is down to earth and unspoiled. A pleasure to work with in the songwriting process, etc... Most of all, he's incredibly marketable. I've been playing drums in bands for 23 years and this is the first time any label has been interested, so call it what you want, but I wanna go out and see the world and get paid for doing what I love.

Here are the requirements:

You are between the ages of 25-38

You live in the Metro-Detroit, Michigan area

You are a seasoned musician, capable of playing almost anything and can participate in the writing process

You are punctual and have a good work ethic

You don't have a big ego and you're easy to work with

You will trust that the producer is looking out for what's best for the song and you can readily accept constructive criticism

You don't use drugs

You don't drink alcolhol or can control drinking and will not drink at practice or before a show

You will pass a physical including drug test

You will pass a pyschological exam for depression or other problems

You are not married and have no ties which will keep you grounded. Once we start touring, there's no guarantee when you'll come back home

You readily accept that our lead guitarist is the star of the show and you may not make a name for yourself. You also will not get an equal share of monetary compensation due to the fact that everyone is replaceable, including the producer, except our lead guitarist

You will be wearing a mask and perhaps a costume. Our lead guitarist is only band member that's unmasked

You are not afraid of flying.

You will be prepared to tour by July 2006

 

If you or anyone you know are eligible/interested, send me a note. We will not start meeting with prospects until our first demo is done. Tryouts will likely start within a week or two. At that time, we will give you a link to our music to see if you're interested, but not until then.

 

Ken

 

[the masked drummer]

One more thing: Once signed, we will likely tour Europe and Asia right away, so you will need to get a passport. Also, I don't think Canada will let you in their country if you have any drunk driving tickets, and we will need to tour through Canada...