You`re No Fun Anymore - Monty Python, Vol. 3

[IbanezJem]

11 minutes ago, blackhawkrush said:

      Well, things is pretty bad there at the moment, but there does seem some hope of a constitutional settlement.  

 I had to bring the goat, he's not well. I only hope he don't go on the carpet.

[blackhawkrush]

19 hours ago, IbanezJem said:

 I had to bring the goat, he's not well. I only hope he don't go on the carpet.

I object to this resurgence of cheap jokes about poo-poos.    

[IbanezJem]

42 minutes ago, blackhawkrush said:

I object to this resurgence of cheap jokes about poo-poos.    

 I've been designing a cathedral, doing unpublicized work for charity, er, finishing my history of the world, of course, pulling the birds, er, photographing royalty on the loo, averting World War Three... can't be bad... and, er, learning to read.

[blackhawkrush]

34 minutes ago, IbanezJem said:

 I've been designing a cathedral, doing unpublicized work for charity, er, finishing my history of the world, of course, pulling the birds, er, photographing royalty on the loo, averting World War Three... can't be bad... and, er, learning to read.

Well, everyone is talking about the Third World War which broke out this morning.   

[IbanezJem]

41 minutes ago, blackhawkrush said:

Well, everyone is talking about the Third World War which broke out this morning.   

I see. Well, of course, this is just the sort blinkered philistine pig-ignorance I've come to expect from you non-creative garbage. You sit there on your loathsome spotty behinds squeezing blackheads, not caring a tinker's cuss for the struggling artist. You excrement! 

[blackhawkrush]

46 minutes ago, IbanezJem said:

I see. Well, of course, this is just the sort blinkered philistine pig-ignorance I've come to expect from you non-creative garbage. You sit there on your loathsome spotty behinds squeezing blackheads, not caring a tinker's cuss for the struggling artist. You excrement! 

      He hasn't got shit all over him.  

[IbanezJem]

1 hour ago, blackhawkrush said:

      He hasn't got shit all over him.  

Oh well, that's just insurance jargon, you know. 

[blackhawkrush]

19 hours ago, IbanezJem said:

Oh well, that's just insurance jargon, you know. 

Bally tenpenny ones dropping in the custard?  

[IbanezJem]

14 minutes ago, blackhawkrush said:

Bally tenpenny ones dropping in the custard?  

I wouldn't wipe me nose on it. 

[1-0-0-1-0-0-1]

6 minutes ago, IbanezJem said:

I wouldn't wipe me nose on it. 

 

Who's got a boil on the bum? Boil on the botty?

[blackhawkrush]

42 minutes ago, 1-0-0-1-0-0-1 said:

 

Who's got a boil on the bum? Boil on the botty?

Strewth!  

[IbanezJem]

17 minutes ago, blackhawkrush said:

Strewth!  

Yes, just gave me the dagger and tripped, and went, 'Oops'. 

[blackhawkrush]

1 hour ago, IbanezJem said:

Yes, just gave me the dagger and tripped, and went, 'Oops'. 

So, the murderer must be somebody in this room.  

[1-0-0-1-0-0-1]

50 minutes ago, blackhawkrush said:

So, the murderer must be somebody in this room.  

 

Yes, sir. It was a very very bad thing to have done and I'm really very ashamed of myself. To have murdered so many people in such a short space of time is really awful. I can only say it won't happen again.

[blackhawkrush]

13 minutes ago, 1-0-0-1-0-0-1 said:

 

Yes, sir. It was a very very bad thing to have done and I'm really very ashamed of myself. To have murdered so many people in such a short space of time is really awful. I can only say it won't happen again.

All right. We'll kill him first and then have tea and biscuits.   

[1-0-0-1-0-0-1]

7 minutes ago, blackhawkrush said:

All right. We'll kill him first and then have tea and biscuits.   

 

Oh, oh, no more buttered scones for me, mater. I'm off to play the grand piano!

[IbanezJem]

13 minutes ago, 1-0-0-1-0-0-1 said:

 

Oh, oh, no more buttered scones for me, mater. I'm off to play the grand piano!

 This is E sharp... and this one is G. You get the general idea. 

[blackhawkrush]

29 minutes ago, IbanezJem said:

 This is E sharp... and this one is G. You get the general idea. 

More apparatus please, nurse: the E.E.G.  

[IbanezJem]

16 minutes ago, blackhawkrush said:

More apparatus please, nurse: the E.E.G.  

Er, look would you mind running along for ten minutes? Make it half an hour.

[blackhawkrush]

5 minutes ago, IbanezJem said:

Er, look would you mind running along for ten minutes? Make it half an hour.

How shall we f*#k off, O Lord?  

[IbanezJem]

39 minutes ago, blackhawkrush said:

How shall we f*#k off, O Lord?  

Umm, straight down there. Straight down there. 

[blackhawkrush]

1 hour ago, IbanezJem said:

Umm, straight down there. Straight down there. 

Well, I can't help noticing that, for someone who claims to write things in a very roundabout way, your last answer has had very little of the discursive quality about it.    

[IbanezJem]

22 minutes ago, blackhawkrush said:

Well, I can't help noticing that, for someone who claims to write things in a very roundabout way, your last answer has had very little of the discursive quality about it.    

 The rules are very simple: each week we get a large fee; at the end of that week we get another large fee; if there's been no interruption at the end of the year we get a repeat fee which can be added on for tax purposes to the previous year or the following year if there's no new series.

[blackhawkrush]

1 hour ago, IbanezJem said:

 The rules are very simple: each week we get a large fee; at the end of that week we get another large fee; if there's been no interruption at the end of the year we get a repeat fee which can be added on for tax purposes to the previous year or the following year if there's no new series.

      Say it slower, old chap.  

[1-0-0-1-0-0-1]

20 hours ago, blackhawkrush said:

      Say it slower, old chap.  

 

Well, as the Conservative candidate I just drone on and on and on and on without letting anyone else get a word in edgeways, until I start to froth at the mouth and fall over backwards.