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What Made You Do A Facepalm Today??


Principled Man
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Reading that Travis Barker named his daughter, Alabama. What kind of person does that?

 

Wasn't that the name of the hooker in True Romance?

 

Yeah, played by Patricia Arquette.

 

“Alabama” was also an unseen, mentioned character in Reservoir Dogs.

 

The name works better in fiction.

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This Week At Walmart:

 

Florida: Two men argue at the sales counter, each one pulls a gun. No shots fired.

Louisiana: Man asks a clerk, "Can you get me something that will kill 200 people?"

Missouri: 20-year old man walks into the store wearing body armor and carrying a tactical rifle and another gun

 

 

 

:facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm:

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The same as last time. The Jerkazoid running this country. and i'm NOT SORRY I called him that.

RLpq5D8.gif

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We all know someone who is just oblivious. I happen to know a guy who literally suffers from Michael Scott from The Office "what in the world is wrong with him?"-level obliviousness. His name is Jerry and I ran into him the other day.

 

I frequent my local surplus store and even work there part-time and was hanging out there on Wednesday. Jerry frequents the store, too (in fact, it's where we met) and came strolling in. Jerry has had a beard for as long as I've known him and has always kept it trimmed at about a quarter inch long but for the past few months Jerry had been growing his beard out because he'd been wondering how he'd look and had grown it out to about an inch and a half long. When he came in the owner, Rich, and I saw that he'd trimmed it back to it's original length but we didn't say anything, we just kept chatting and Jerry was leaning on the counter listening to us. A lull in the conversation came up and Jerry rubbed his chin and said with a huge grin: "as you can see I trimmed my bush". Now, Jerry honestly meant that in the sense that his beard had gotten too long like an unkempt shrub, not in the slang sense that we're all familiar with. Rich and I exchanged incredulous looks and kind of just looked down at our feet for a moment and looked back at Jerry who just said: "what?" Rich and I just muttered: "yeah, cool" and: "okay, man".

 

When we first met and had chatted a few times and before I realized what a weirdo he is, I made the mistake of giving Jerry my number and he texts me almost daily always wanting to hang out (as you might have guessed he's pretty lonely) and I make excuses every time because I have this fear that we'd be out in public together and he'd blurt out one of his dumbass comments. He's confided in me that he honestly wonders why no one ever wants to hang out with him.

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We all know someone who is just oblivious. I happen to know a guy who literally suffers from Michael Scott from The Office "what in the world is wrong with him?"-level obliviousness. His name is Jerry and I ran into him the other day.

 

I frequent my local surplus store and even work there part-time and was hanging out there on Wednesday. Jerry frequents the store, too (in fact, it's where we met) and came strolling in. Jerry has had a beard for as long as I've known him and has always kept it trimmed at about a quarter inch long but for the past few months Jerry had been growing his beard out because he'd been wondering how he'd look and had grown it out to about an inch and a half long. When he came in the owner, Rich, and I saw that he'd trimmed it back to it's original length but we didn't say anything, we just kept chatting and Jerry was leaning on the counter listening to us. A lull in the conversation came up and Jerry rubbed his chin and said with a huge grin: "as you can see I trimmed my bush". Now, Jerry honestly meant that in the sense that his beard had gotten too long like an unkempt shrub, not in the slang sense that we're all familiar with. Rich and I exchanged incredulous looks and kind of just looked down at our feet for a moment and looked back at Jerry who just said: "what?" Rich and I just muttered: "yeah, cool" and: "okay, man".

 

When we first met and had chatted a few times and before I realized what a weirdo he is, I made the mistake of giving Jerry my number and he texts me almost daily always wanting to hang out (as you might have guessed he's pretty lonely) and I make excuses every time because I have this fear that we'd be out in public together and he'd blurt out one of his dumbass comments. He's confided in me that he honestly wonders why no one ever wants to hang out with him.

 

Yeah, everyone has run into a person like that sometime. I seem to have gotten away from all of mine...

nEGgleK.jpg

Edited by OldRUSHfan
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Earlier this week, my son who works for a Basement repair company was called to a home of a current customer to check their drainage system. The lady said she was selling the house and wanted an inspection. He did a full inspection and found the her main basement walls were bowing two inches (not hard to check this...put a long level against the wall and check for a gap). He noted this on his inspection report. Lady got pissed because she said she just wanted the drainage system inspected. She wanted him to remove the bowing information from his report.

 

Uh lady, his job is to be thorough. He would get fired if he didn't do a proper inspection. If you don't want to pay to fix it, that's your prerogative; your house, your problem.

 

It went further and she complained to his supervisor. Supervisor told her to pound sand and had his back. She filled a BBB report as well which was comical. Ok, you want to hide your basement problem, but you go and announce it on the internet? She claimed 'extortion', buy my son never gave her an estimate because he got the feeling real quick that she was :wacko:

 

Sorry lady, but if you want to defraud your buyer, my kid isn't your stooge.

 

Edit: the inspection and report was no charge, which he does all the time as follow-ups to current customers. She got the truth for free, but didn't want it.

 

you-want-the-truth-you-cant-handle-the-truth-diylol-com-44473648.png

Edited by HemiBeers
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Earlier this week, my son who works for a Basement repair company was called to a home of a current customer to check their drainage system. The lady said she was selling the house and wanted an inspection. He did a full inspection and found the her main basement walls were bowing two inches (not hard to check this...put a long level against the wall and check for a gap). He noted this on his inspection report. Lady got pissed because she said she just wanted the drainage system inspected. She wanted him to remove the bowing information from his report.

 

Uh lady, his job is to be thorough. He would get fired if he didn't do a proper inspection. If you don't want to pay to fix it, that's your prerogative; your house, your problem.

 

It went further and she complained to his supervisor. Supervisor told her to pound sand and had his back. She filled a BBB report as well which was comical. Ok, you want to hide your basement problem, but you go and announce it on the internet? She claimed 'extortion', buy my son never gave her an estimate because he got the feeling real quick that she was :wacko:

 

Sorry lady, but if you want to defraud your buyer, my kid isn't your stooge.

 

Edit: the inspection and report was no charge, which he does all the time as follow-ups to current customers. She got the truth for free, but didn't want it.

 

you-want-the-truth-you-cant-handle-the-truth-diylol-com-44473648.png

 

Glad the supervisor stood behind your son! Sounds like the woman was well aware of the problem and just wanted some type of paper to wave in front of buyers that something checked out ok. Sheesh.

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Woman puts an octopus on her face for a photo, ends up in hospital.

 

octopus-770x433.jpeg?elBaxVCca0gfgXQi6Ce5PQwKMaYEaSPA

 

What a f*cking idiot.

https://www.livescience.com/amp/octopus-bit-womans-face.html

 

"A woman's ill-advised photo attempt with an octopus recently went horribly wrong: After she draped the cephalopod on her face, the octopus dug in with its suckers and bit her on the chin, causing a painful infection that sent her to the emergency room.

 

Jamie Bisceglia, a resident of Fox Island, Washington, and owner of the fishing company South Sound Salmon Sisters, was trying to create a memorable image for a photo contest..."

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Watching raging alcoholics pound "Mexican Meth Lab": tequila, redbull and tabasco.

 

fun.

 

:hug2: Not sure if it sounds better or worse than a relative with their "Cinnamon Toast Crunch shots" - Fireball and Rumchata . . .yuck

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Woman puts an octopus on her face for a photo, ends up in hospital.

 

octopus-770x433.jpeg?elBaxVCca0gfgXQi6Ce5PQwKMaYEaSPA

 

What a f*cking idiot.

https://www.livescience.com/amp/octopus-bit-womans-face.html

 

"A woman's ill-advised photo attempt with an octopus recently went horribly wrong: After she draped the cephalopod on her face, the octopus dug in with its suckers and bit her on the chin, causing a painful infection that sent her to the emergency room.

 

Jamie Bisceglia, a resident of Fox Island, Washington, and owner of the fishing company South Sound Salmon Sisters, was trying to create a memorable image for a photo contest..."

 

Unbeknownst to her, she was really trying to win the 2019 Darwin Award.

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Woman puts an octopus on her face for a photo, ends up in hospital.

 

octopus-770x433.jpeg?elBaxVCca0gfgXQi6Ce5PQwKMaYEaSPA

 

What a f*cking idiot.

https://www.livescience.com/amp/octopus-bit-womans-face.html

 

"A woman's ill-advised photo attempt with an octopus recently went horribly wrong: After she draped the cephalopod on her face, the octopus dug in with its suckers and bit her on the chin, causing a painful infection that sent her to the emergency room.

 

Jamie Bisceglia, a resident of Fox Island, Washington, and owner of the fishing company South Sound Salmon Sisters, was trying to create a memorable image for a photo contest..."

 

She was successful as it was definitely memorable!!!

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Watching raging alcoholics pound "Mexican Meth Lab": tequila, redbull and tabasco.

 

fun.

 

:hug2: Not sure if it sounds better or worse than a relative with their "Cinnamon Toast Crunch shots" - Fireball and Rumchata . . .yuck

Eesh.
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What is the worst part about this case?

 

1. A man from Rosemount, MN was convicted for his 18th drunk driving offense, which caused serious injuries to others.

2. He received only three years for the crime.

3. It took the court two years to complete the trial and sentencing process. He gets 16 months credit for time served.

 

 

:facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm:

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What is the worst part about this case?

 

1. A man from Rosemount, MN was convicted for his 18th drunk driving offense, which caused serious injuries to others.

2. He received only three years for the crime.

3. It took the court two years to complete the trial and sentencing process. He gets 16 months credit for time served.

 

 

:facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm:

 

I’d be okay with all of that if each of his victims were allowed to plow into him using the same vehicle and driving at the same speed as when he plowed into them.

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The utterly stupid choices a professional level coach can make.

You're going to have to be a biiiiit more specific...

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Why so many people actually voted for Trump in the first place. He is DEFINITELY the MOST STUPID PRESIDENT YET.

nEGgleK.jpg

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