Rhyta Posted July 24, 2015 Share Posted July 24, 2015 (edited) My husband found his mom on the floor in her house yesterday. She had a heart attack and probably died instantly. He's pretty shaken and it still seem so unreal, we just had dinner with her last Saturday. She had high blood pressure and a history of blood clots in her legs so it was a matter of time I guess. But it never is easy to face.I've been on TRF off and on since we found out Thursday and I appreciate being able to lose myself here for a while. I am so sad and shocked, it still doesn't seem real. Just needed to vent a little here with my friends. Thanks for listening. I loved her a lot and I will do whatever I can to help him, it was so hard for me when I lost my Dad and that was over 20 years ago so I know he has a long hard adjustment ahead of him. Now we only have my Mom left :( Edited July 24, 2015 by Rhyta 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
grep Posted July 24, 2015 Share Posted July 24, 2015 I am sorry for your loss. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laughedatbytime Posted July 24, 2015 Share Posted July 24, 2015 Sorry to hear the news...my deepest sympathies for your loss... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lorraine Posted July 24, 2015 Share Posted July 24, 2015 Rhyta, it is very difficult to lose someone suddenly that you weren't expecting to lose. And even when you wrote: "we just had dinner with her last Saturday" - it's things like that that make it seem even harder. Your husband will be all right. And you will too. It might take a year or so, but you will see! In any event, my sincere sympathy to you and your husband. It's never easy losing a parent, no matter what age you are. :hug2: 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toymaker Posted July 24, 2015 Share Posted July 24, 2015 Very sorry to hear your news, Rhyta. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crimsonmistymemory Posted July 24, 2015 Share Posted July 24, 2015 OMG my sincerest condolences! I feel your pain losing immediate family is tough. It reinforces that that one can be here today and gone tomorrow. So we have to try to make the best of today. Especially hard to do if related parties are going through a rough patch. In July of 05 we lost my wife's Dad, her(our- long story)Grandma who was more a Mom to her than her own Mom (another long story) and my Dad all within 7 days. It was a rough time for us especially for me considering I still had a ax to grind with my Dad that I never got to put behind us when he was here. Enjoy everyone around you while their here is the lesson I learned. Once again my condolences and I hope your hubby's Mom will have a safe journey home. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Babycat Posted July 24, 2015 Share Posted July 24, 2015 I am so sorry for your loss - I feel awful for both you and your husband. :( 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treeduck Posted July 24, 2015 Share Posted July 24, 2015 Sorry to hear about this. And I know exactly how he feels 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maverick Posted July 24, 2015 Share Posted July 24, 2015 Prayers to you and your family, Rhyta. And prayers for your husband and mother in law, especially. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Narps Posted July 24, 2015 Share Posted July 24, 2015 So sorry to hear my friend. Not that it matters but the exact same situation happen to my wife's mother 15 years ago and my father in law just came home and found her after being gone only for a brief time. Take care of you and yours... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
librarian Posted July 24, 2015 Share Posted July 24, 2015 Rhyta, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
satchmothesnowdog Posted July 24, 2015 Share Posted July 24, 2015 Sorry :( 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhyta Posted July 24, 2015 Author Share Posted July 24, 2015 Thanks for all the encouragement, just helps to know others understand. Going to take a day at a time. Bless you all. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EagleMoon Posted July 25, 2015 Share Posted July 25, 2015 Awww, that's so sad. It makes it even more shocking that it was so sudden. When my mom passed away she'd been sick for several months beforehand was I was at least a little mentally prepared. Even so it was one of the worst things I've ever been through. Condolences to your husband and you too. BIG HUGS 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lost In Xanadu Posted July 25, 2015 Share Posted July 25, 2015 Very sorry to hear this, hope you and your family get thru it together. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhyta Posted July 25, 2015 Author Share Posted July 25, 2015 (edited) Thanks Eagle Moon and Lost in Xanadu. I don't which is harder, losing them so quickly or watching them slowly fade away. My dad was diagnosed with lung cancer in February and was gone by August in 1991. It was nice to have the time to talk with him but it was hard to see his decline. Losing my MIL so fast, we didn't get the chance to say goodbye. Either way it is hard to let go of them. It will take time. Edited July 25, 2015 by Rhyta 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnRogers Posted July 25, 2015 Share Posted July 25, 2015 Everybody has to grieve and heal their own way. If coming here for a few minutes helps in any small way good for you. I still have my parents and have no idea how I'll handle it. I'll look to my wife who just lost her mom a year ago I supose. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RushCanuck Posted July 25, 2015 Share Posted July 25, 2015 I am sorry to hear this, Rhyta. It is always hard to lose a loved one.My cousin found my uncle dead in his house last year. The suddenness is difficult because you didn't know or expect it to happen so quickly without warning. But, the quickness is sometimes a blessing in disguise. I watched my beloved Dad suffer for months, and he kept wishing it would be over.Hugs to you and your husband. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhyta Posted July 25, 2015 Author Share Posted July 25, 2015 Thanks JohnRogers. Yes grieving is a process, I just wish I wasn't going through it again but I know a lot of coping mechanisms that I didn't have when I lost my dad. Enjoy the time you have with your parents now. My Mom going to be 90 this year so I treasure each day with her, even more now. TRF is great therapy for me and listening to Rush too. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhyta Posted July 25, 2015 Author Share Posted July 25, 2015 I am sorry to hear this, Rhyta. It is always hard to lose a loved one.My cousin found my uncle dead in his house last year. The suddenness is difficult because you didn't know or expect it to happen so quickly without warning. But, the quickness is sometimes a blessing in disguise. I watched my beloved Dad suffer for months, and he kept wishing it would be over.Hugs to you and your husband. thanks my friend, I did the same thing with my dad and it hurt so much to see him in pain and so scared. I am glad my MIL went fast so she didn't suffer. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bean-tor Posted July 25, 2015 Share Posted July 25, 2015 I'm so sorry to hear this, Rhyta. My condolences to you and your family 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue J Posted July 25, 2015 Share Posted July 25, 2015 I'm so very sorry to hear this, Rhyta. I haven't had this experience with a parent; mine are both still alive, but definitely getting older...but I did go through something just like it with my sister. We were as close as siblings could be, and talked frequently. And the last time we spoke to each other was by phone, and we were laughing like crazy; everything was fine...it was really good. And then about 36 hours later, she was gone. So you have my sincerest sympathies for what you guys are going through right now. Be well and take care. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
geezer Posted July 25, 2015 Share Posted July 25, 2015 I believe that words can't help in this kind of situation, but at the same time I am touched by your words.Hope you and your husband can heal this wound somehow and find a way to cope with this loss and in the meantime accept my best and warmest hug. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Your_Lion Posted July 25, 2015 Share Posted July 25, 2015 So sorry for your loss, Rhyta :( 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
x1yyz Posted July 25, 2015 Share Posted July 25, 2015 I am very sorry, Rhyta. My condolences to you and your husband. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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