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My Mom Has Cancer. Again.


Alsgalpal
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To all who have or have had family members with colon cancer, please go see a doctor to have a colonoscopy. May not be pleasant but at least you can rule it out or get treatment in time if they find anything. Whatever you may think of it I can promise you it will be nothing against the pain when the cancer turns terminal.

 

Please take care of yourself. :hug2:

Two years back I had genetic testing done because of a family cancer risk. I have ovarian, breast and colon cancer in my family and there is a strong link with these three cancers. I tested negative for carrying the gene that apparently houses these cancers. Now, that doesn't mean I won't develop ovarian, breast or colon cancer, but it does mean that my chances of being diagnosed are the same as it would occur in anyone else not carrying the gene. My doctor said that I can wait until I'm 50 to get a colonoscopy. I'm thinking I'll get one at 45 just because I'm still a bit paranoid since both my parents were diagnosed with cancer in the same week (my mom's second cancer diagnosis and she would be diagnosed a third time a year later). My father passed away at age 50 and my mother passed two years later.

 

My parents avoided doctors. They went way too late. It's important for everyone to just go and get checked out. Better to be safe than sorry. No matter how unpleasant the tests may be.

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They found a shadow in her lung as well. Possibly metastasized.

 

And it could be nothing. Fingers crossed and hugs.

 

I also hope fervently that she gets some quality of life back now. It sucks to feel lousy round the clock, week after week.

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To all who have or have had family members with colon cancer, please go see a doctor to have a colonoscopy. May not be pleasant but at least you can rule it out or get treatment in time if they find anything. Whatever you may think of it I can promise you it will be nothing against the pain when the cancer turns terminal.

 

Please take care of yourself. :hug2:

Two years back I had genetic testing done because of a family cancer risk. I have ovarian, breast and colon cancer in my family and there is a strong link with these three cancers. I tested negative for carrying the gene that apparently houses these cancers. Now, that doesn't mean I won't develop ovarian, breast or colon cancer, but it does mean that my chances of being diagnosed are the same as it would occur in anyone else not carrying the gene. My doctor said that I can wait until I'm 50 to get a colonoscopy. I'm thinking I'll get one at 45 just because I'm still a bit paranoid since both my parents were diagnosed with cancer in the same week (my mom's second cancer diagnosis and she would be diagnosed a third time a year later). My father passed away at age 50 and my mother passed two years later.

 

My parents avoided doctors. They went way too late. It's important for everyone to just go and get checked out. Better to be safe than sorry. No matter how unpleasant the tests may be.

 

My stepbrother-in-law had a small spot on the back of his head. It itched sometimes, and when his wife - my stepsister - saw him scratching at it she'd scold him and lean on him to go to the doctor.

 

Finally this past January it started to crust and bleed and he did go to the doctor.

 

Stage 4 melanoma. It's in his brain, his liver, and doctors removed 70 affected lymph nodes. He is on chemo and radiation, but he is going to die in 12-18 months. Without the chemo and radiation the prognosis would be 6 months.

 

He has an 11 year old daughter. :(

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To all who have or have had family members with colon cancer, please go see a doctor to have a colonoscopy. May not be pleasant but at least you can rule it out or get treatment in time if they find anything. Whatever you may think of it I can promise you it will be nothing against the pain when the cancer turns terminal.

 

Please take care of yourself. :hug2:

Two years back I had genetic testing done because of a family cancer risk. I have ovarian, breast and colon cancer in my family and there is a strong link with these three cancers. I tested negative for carrying the gene that apparently houses these cancers. Now, that doesn't mean I won't develop ovarian, breast or colon cancer, but it does mean that my chances of being diagnosed are the same as it would occur in anyone else not carrying the gene. My doctor said that I can wait until I'm 50 to get a colonoscopy. I'm thinking I'll get one at 45 just because I'm still a bit paranoid since both my parents were diagnosed with cancer in the same week (my mom's second cancer diagnosis and she would be diagnosed a third time a year later). My father passed away at age 50 and my mother passed two years later.

 

My parents avoided doctors. They went way too late. It's important for everyone to just go and get checked out. Better to be safe than sorry. No matter how unpleasant the tests may be.

 

My stepbrother-in-law had a small spot on the back of his head. It itched sometimes, and when his wife - my stepsister - saw him scratching at it she'd scold him and lean on him to go to the doctor.

 

Finally this past January it started to crust and bleed and he did go to the doctor.

 

Stage 4 melanoma. It's in his brain, his liver, and doctors removed 70 affected lymph nodes. He is on chemo and radiation, but he is going to die in 12-18 months. Without the chemo and radiation the prognosis would be 6 months.

 

He has an 11 year old daughter. :(

Oh wow. Such a shame. I feel so bad for his family. It's got to be a tough thing for a child to go through. I was in my late 20s when my parents passed so could handle it ok. I mean, I was a mess but I could handle what I was experiencing.

 

By the time my dad went to the doctor, the cancer had spread to his liver. He passed away six weeks later. Two weeks before my wedding.

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To all who have or have had family members with colon cancer, please go see a doctor to have a colonoscopy. May not be pleasant but at least you can rule it out or get treatment in time if they find anything. Whatever you may think of it I can promise you it will be nothing against the pain when the cancer turns terminal.

 

Please take care of yourself. :hug2:

Two years back I had genetic testing done because of a family cancer risk. I have ovarian, breast and colon cancer in my family and there is a strong link with these three cancers. I tested negative for carrying the gene that apparently houses these cancers. Now, that doesn't mean I won't develop ovarian, breast or colon cancer, but it does mean that my chances of being diagnosed are the same as it would occur in anyone else not carrying the gene. My doctor said that I can wait until I'm 50 to get a colonoscopy. I'm thinking I'll get one at 45 just because I'm still a bit paranoid since both my parents were diagnosed with cancer in the same week (my mom's second cancer diagnosis and she would be diagnosed a third time a year later). My father passed away at age 50 and my mother passed two years later.

 

My parents avoided doctors. They went way too late. It's important for everyone to just go and get checked out. Better to be safe than sorry. No matter how unpleasant the tests may be.

 

My stepbrother-in-law had a small spot on the back of his head. It itched sometimes, and when his wife - my stepsister - saw him scratching at it she'd scold him and lean on him to go to the doctor.

 

Finally this past January it started to crust and bleed and he did go to the doctor.

 

Stage 4 melanoma. It's in his brain, his liver, and doctors removed 70 affected lymph nodes. He is on chemo and radiation, but he is going to die in 12-18 months. Without the chemo and radiation the prognosis would be 6 months.

 

He has an 11 year old daughter. :(

 

:( Sorry to hear

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To all who have or have had family members with colon cancer, please go see a doctor to have a colonoscopy. May not be pleasant but at least you can rule it out or get treatment in time if they find anything. Whatever you may think of it I can promise you it will be nothing against the pain when the cancer turns terminal.

 

Please take care of yourself. :hug2:

Two years back I had genetic testing done because of a family cancer risk. I have ovarian, breast and colon cancer in my family and there is a strong link with these three cancers. I tested negative for carrying the gene that apparently houses these cancers. Now, that doesn't mean I won't develop ovarian, breast or colon cancer, but it does mean that my chances of being diagnosed are the same as it would occur in anyone else not carrying the gene. My doctor said that I can wait until I'm 50 to get a colonoscopy. I'm thinking I'll get one at 45 just because I'm still a bit paranoid since both my parents were diagnosed with cancer in the same week (my mom's second cancer diagnosis and she would be diagnosed a third time a year later). My father passed away at age 50 and my mother passed two years later.

 

My parents avoided doctors. They went way too late. It's important for everyone to just go and get checked out. Better to be safe than sorry. No matter how unpleasant the tests may be.

 

Precisely! If they find something that shouldn't be there chances are they can remove it before it's too late. If they don't find anything it's such a relief you'll feel like you literally been granted life again.

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To all who have or have had family members with colon cancer, please go see a doctor to have a colonoscopy. May not be pleasant but at least you can rule it out or get treatment in time if they find anything. Whatever you may think of it I can promise you it will be nothing against the pain when the cancer turns terminal.

 

Please take care of yourself. :hug2:

Apparently I am going to have my first one sometime in the near future. As long as I am asleep and unaware they can shove whatever they want up there while they are at it. My wife had one recently and she said it was no big deal. All the hospitals and procedures I have been involved with lately have been harder than this will be from what I understand anyway. As sh*ty as my diet has been for most of my life, the results are going to make me a bit nervous for sure.....

 

Best of luck to all involved in this thread with family members having health issues at this time.... :rose:

 

Dude, I got diagnosed with ulcerative colitis last July and believe me, I've become far better acquainted with the last half of my digestive tract than I EVER wanted to be. Colonoscopies whilst under anaesthetic are a treat compared to having one done while conscious (I was in full flare-up, in a lot of pain and discomfort and didn't have anyone to drive me home after, thus no knockout juice). The prep for the conscious procedure was a lot easier, and most of the pain had to do with the fact that the dr. was passing the scope through bloody ulcerated inflamed intestine. I was biting the pillow and squeezing the bejesus out of the nurse's hand!

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To all who have or have had family members with colon cancer, please go see a doctor to have a colonoscopy. May not be pleasant but at least you can rule it out or get treatment in time if they find anything. Whatever you may think of it I can promise you it will be nothing against the pain when the cancer turns terminal.

 

Please take care of yourself. :hug2:

Apparently I am going to have my first one sometime in the near future. As long as I am asleep and unaware they can shove whatever they want up there while they are at it. My wife had one recently and she said it was no big deal. All the hospitals and procedures I have been involved with lately have been harder than this will be from what I understand anyway. As sh*ty as my diet has been for most of my life, the results are going to make me a bit nervous for sure.....

 

Best of luck to all involved in this thread with family members having health issues at this time.... :rose:

 

Dude, I got diagnosed with ulcerative colitis last July and believe me, I've become far better acquainted with the last half of my digestive tract than I EVER wanted to be. Colonoscopies whilst under anaesthetic are a treat compared to having one done while conscious (I was in full flare-up, in a lot of pain and discomfort and didn't have anyone to drive me home after, thus no knockout juice). The prep for the conscious procedure was a lot easier, and most of the pain had to do with the fact that the dr. was passing the scope through bloody ulcerated inflamed intestine. I was biting the pillow and squeezing the bejesus out of the nurse's hand!

:( Yowza!
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They found a shadow in her lung as well. Possibly metastasized.

 

And it could be nothing. Fingers crossed and hugs.

 

I also hope fervently that she gets some quality of life back now. It sucks to feel lousy round the clock, week after week.

I hope it;s nothing too. Hope you get some good news for a change!

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Tuesday and Wednesday were my weekends.

 

The last two days I've been doing hair for the gal that I bought my horse from. She wanted to see her since she misses her, and I thought 'Why not?' So, during our hair appointment, she's bitching about her hair that she turned red even though I've always told her she shouldn't do it because she never likes it and then damages the shit out of it to get the red out. So, I worked on this needy, backbiting woman for the last two days. I toned the color to cancel out the red, and then she panicked over the toner I used. Made me rinse it out early, then was pissed that the red was still there.

 

All while this is going on, the barn owner sent me over 20 texts about my hay situation, my stall being cobweby, the horse pushing out bedding into her run, how she wanted to move her to a center aisle stall because of that. I can do no right with this woman right now. She bitched about my horse, my hay delivery people and the 4H $10 check that I already paid for.

 

Then I got the message from my mom yesterday while Red Bitch was having me work the red out of her hair.

 

Later on, when I got done with my counsellor, I rode out to the barn to check on the horse, and saw that the Red Bitch was still there. She chewed me up one side and down the other for not taking good care of the horse. (!!!! She's the one that abandoned her, thats how I got her!) she told me I needed to change her hay, her grain, her turn out (that I need to move her out of there immediately) and that my tack is hurting her even though I haven't been on her in 6 weeks. She bitched that the horse needed shoes and that she was out of her mind with anxiety when she took her out of the stall...

 

First of all.... Last time I let that woman ride her, the horse was in so much distress I told her to get off of her. She's afraid of this woman. I haven't been riding because the farrier trimmed her feet too close and he's not coming back again. There was a feed misunderstanding and she didn't get her food the way she needed and dropped some weight. She's back up to where she should be now. She gets turned out daily. I work her almost daily.

 

I was pissed.

 

Then, the other barn person started in on me about my youngest child and how she hasn't been listening during the riding lessons. I told her that she is normally pretty good and that none of us are quite up to par mentally due to being extremely worried about my mom. She piped back with "yeah yeah I know. My dad had cancer too. No big deal." NO f***ing BIG DEAL?

 

What the f**k is wrong with people? I just want people to back off. I'm being pulled in so many different directions. Work is sucking ass right now because the new girl took over my schedule because she needed her social life back. She doesn't care that I've been fighting my ex husband over bringing the girls home because I've been working nights... He wants to keep the girls indefinitely since he wouldn't have to pay child support. I told my boss that my home life is sucking and that Eric and I are on the outs because I'm never home and that I'm on the verge of losing my kids because I don't have enough money to pay for a lawyer... New girl doesn't care since it's not her. Boss told me he didn't care. Even though he promised me Monday -Friday days after we got enough people. He doesn't care. I guess seniority and loyalty with tons of hard work doesn't pay around here...

 

My life is shit and I just want it to be ok. I need to breath. I need to feel like I'm not on the verge of losing everyone.

 

I f***ing hate this shit.

 

 

What the f**k is going on? I just want my mom to be ok, and I want Eric and I to be ok. That's all I want. I can deal with the other shit...

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^^^^ Me too. I wish for at least some peace in your life very soon followed closely by a bunch of happiness shortly there after...... :sigh: :rose: :hug2:
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I really wish I didn't live on the opposite end of the continent - I would absolutely be there for you!

 

Time to tell Red Bitch to f*ck off. Not her horse anymore - she doesn't make demands, she doesn't touch, and she most certainly does not go into the stall! I know you can't cut all of the toxic assholes out of your life; some of them just have to be dealt with as best as you can manage. But she's one you can definitely tell to get lost.

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I really wish I didn't live on the opposite end of the continent - I would absolutely be there for you!

 

Time to tell Red Bitch to f*ck off. Not her horse anymore - she doesn't make demands, she doesn't touch, and she most certainly does not go into the stall! I know you can't cut all of the toxic assholes out of your life; some of them just have to be dealt with as best as you can manage. But she's one you can definitely tell to get lost.

 

 

I wish all of the Rush Forum peeps lived closer too. :( Especially you. :hug2:

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^^^^ Me too. I wish for at least some peace in your life very soon followed closely by a bunch of happiness shortly there after...... :sigh: :rose: :hug2:

Wish there was more I could do for you... I hope you find strength to help you thru this.

 

 

 

Thank you guys! It's been comforting to come here and see the outpouring of support. It's very much appreciated.

 

 

I went and bought vitamins last night, and then went for a run this morning before I rode my Ninja to work. I feel like I took an ibuprofen for the pain... It's there but tolerable.

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Hey Alsgalpal, Sorry to hear about what's going on. Does your boss want to honor some FMLA (Family Medical Leave Act) time for you right about now or is he looking for a lawsuit? Edited by rushfanforever!
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Quick update:

 

My mom has surgery on May 29th. I have that day off. I'm going to be staying all day at the hospital. Lately, seems as if everytime I turn around someone is passing on from Colon/Rectal cancer of some sort... This isn't a good thing to have in my mind. One of the people's daughters started a cancer journey blog and the resemblance between that woman and my momma are incredible. I started reading the blog, and it was like a train wreck. I couldn't look away... So far I've been great at not looking up cancer online. I. Just. Can't. It scares me.

 

Life with Eric is getting easier. We are making the slow recovery with each other, and last night I heard some things I needed to hear as well as 'uncovering' something really awesome he meant for me to find on Friday as well as having an awesome Sunday together. You know, resurrection and all that... We are on the climb I think. I'm sure that there will be rough spots, but we are both learning and being vulnerable with each other. I'm relieved. I hope we keep improving.

 

My eldest child had a falling out with a friend she's had for 7 years. Since they were wee ones. Best friends even. This gal told my daughter that she no longer wanted to be friends with her anymore because she was so 'mopey'. My daughter has been having issues with her father, you know, the guy that I was married to who was abusive towards women? So, he's pulling his pathetic man child bullying with the girls now and they hate being with him... So, she's really struggling with my mom being sick and their dad being an ass. They know something is up with E and I, but I haven't told them at all. They have enough on their little plates... Well, this girl told my daughter that she was too down all the time and that she needed positive people in her life. This was a girl that had tried to date the guys my daughter liked, stabbed her in the back a few times and then contacted me to say she was afraid my daughter would start cutting again. Wait, what the hell dow you mean AGAIN??! She never cut in the first place. I know this for a fact. I keep a keen eye on my kids. So, I called their dad and had him look. They weren't cut marks, they were cat scratches on her arm from my moms cat when the girls were at her place for spring break. My mom had text me right after she saw the cat lay into my kid... Ugh...

 

What the f**k is WRONG with people? My daughter is crushed. I understand how she feels. I'm glad that her and I have an open and honest relationship about her life.

 

Like I needed that little ex friend twit of hers digging her heels in and going out with a fizzle when she ended the friendship with my daughter....

 

 

Work is doing a lot better. My boss changed my schedule and fixed it so I only have to work one night a week now. I'm going to be home by 6:30 every night. I'm happy about this. He's also helping me put a game plan together so I can be even more successful at work and earn higher commissions and bonus. Huge weight off my shoulders. Huge relief.

 

I'm selling my horse. I don't have the desire to belong to an animal right now. She needs someone that has the time and desire to be with her. I have neither. I prefer my motorcycle at this point. I just want the financial freedom instead of throwing money away each and every month. I would have an extra $400 per month if I didn't have her... That would be huge. Very beneficial.

Edited by Alsgalpal
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Quick update:

 

My mom has surgery on May 29th. I have that day off. I'm going to be staying all day at the hospital. Lately, seems as if everytime I turn around someone is passing on from Colon/Rectal cancer of some sort... This isn't a good thing to have in my mind. One of the people's daughters started a cancer journey blog and the resemblance between that woman and my momma are incredible. I started reading the blog, and it was like a train wreck. I couldn't look away... So far I've been great at not looking up cancer online. I. Just. Can't. It scares me.

 

Life with Eric is getting easier. We are making the slow recovery with each other, and last night I heard some things I needed to hear as well as 'uncovering' something really awesome he meant for me to find on Friday as well as having an awesome Sunday together. You know, resurrection and all that... We are on the climb I think. I'm sure that there will be rough spots, but we are both learning and being vulnerable with each other. I'm relieved. I hope we keep improving.

 

My eldest child had a falling out with a friend she's had for 7 years. Since they were wee ones. Best friends even. This gal told my daughter that she no longer wanted to be friends with her anymore because she was so 'mopey'. My daughter has been having issues with her father, you know, the guy that I was married to who was abusive towards women? So, he's pulling his pathetic man child bullying with the girls now and they hate being with him... So, she's really struggling with my mom being sick and their dad being an ass. They know something is up with E and I, but I haven't told them at all. They have enough on their little plates... Well, this girl told my daughter that she was too down all the time and that she needed positive people in her life. This was a girl that had tried to date the guys my daughter liked, stabbed her in the back a few times and then contacted me to say she was afraid my daughter would start cutting again. Wait, what the hell dow you mean AGAIN??! She never cut in the first place. I know this for a fact. I keep a keen eye on my kids. So, I called their dad and had him look. They weren't cut marks, they were cat scratches on her arm from my moms cat when the girls were at her place for spring break. My mom had text me right after she saw the cat lay into my kid... Ugh...

 

What the f**k is WRONG with people? My daughter is crushed. I understand how she feels. I'm glad that her and I have an open and honest relationship about her life.

 

Like I needed that little ex friend twit of hers digging her heels in and going out with a fizzle when she ended the friendship with my daughter....

 

 

Work is doing a lot better. My boss changed my schedule and fixed it so I only have to work one night a week now. I'm going to be home by 6:30 every night. I'm happy about this. He's also helping me put a game plan together so I can be even more successful at work and earn higher commissions and bonus. Huge weight off my shoulders. Huge relief.

 

I'm selling my horse. I don't have the desire to belong to an animal right now. She needs someone that has the time and desire to be with her. I have neither. I prefer my motorcycle at this point. I just want the financial freedom instead of throwing money away each and every month. I would have an extra $400 per month if I didn't have her... That would be huge. Very beneficial.

 

Kids can be very cruel. Some because they don't know better and some by design. This former "friend" of your daughter may fall in the latter category. You know what? I'd say good riddance to that. I understand the idea of surrounding yourself with positive thinking people, because negative people has a tendency to suck the life energy out of you. But when you can't be there to support others when they're feeling down, well then you're the one sucking life energy out of people. Oh the irony must be lost on her. It must not feel good for your daughter but I hope she soon discovers that she's better without someone who lives off of your positivity.

 

Seems like you're doing a lot of things to make life easier (lack of better word here). With your mom having cancer I think the simpler your life the better. Strip all the things that don't matter from your life, and put your energy where your heart is :) :hug2:

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So, my momma had surgery on Thursday.

 

 

What a f***ing day... I couldn't sleep at all. Eric was moody, and I was hormonal and a wreck. I woke up to the barn owner sending me a 7 text text that was explaining how she's sick and damn tired of me blaming my financial issues on her (WTF?! I never once said that at all! I never said anything negative about her!!! Stupid barn gossips!) and gave me until the 1st to get the horse out, blah blah blah... So, then I get ready to leave for the hospital, my stomach is in knots.

 

I get to the hospital, and I was late getting there because of traffic and taking a wrong turn in my distress... I get there, and I saw my moms boyfriend, and I just broke down. I didn't get to see her before she went into surgery. He said the dr told him it would take 3.5 hours.

 

2 hours into it, the pager went off. I freaked the f**k out because I just knew something went wrong. We waited in the consult room for the dr. and he came in to say that the surgery went smoother than expected and we will know in 3-5 weeks if further treatment or no treatment is needed.

 

30 mins later we were in the recovery room with her. Her color was great, she was sitting up and had her cantankerous look on her face, which told me she would be fine. She was up and walking in the time it took me to walk to the restroom and back and got herself dressed and was heading home.

 

Her lips are bruised in two places from the breathing apparatus and her throat is sore. She's still sore and didn't have to have a colostomy bag at all.

 

Two hours later, the horse sold to a lady that has been super stressful since the horse went lame again while she was trying her out (she only has stone bruises in her feet, nothing more serious than that) and she ended up buying her. The horse was delievered yesterday.

 

The last week has been hell on wheels. One of the worst weeks I've ever had, actually. I got promised weekends off for my family, and then it was taken away a day later. Eric was under a ton of stress and was taking it out on me, and all of this made me feel like vomiting for the last few days. I'm down to a lower weight again (which is great!) but I was finally able to eat last night.

 

So, everything is good. Eric is good, I'm good. The girls are good. My momma is really good for now! Horse is happy and good.

 

When I said goodbye to her yesterday, I walked up to her, she raised her head out of the grass she was eating that she wouldn't raise her head for anybody for... I wrapped my arms around her head, she leaned into me with a really soft look in her eye. Her ears relaxed and we just stood there. Stock still. I started crying. The horse was tearing up. She knew. She was sad, you could feel it and see it. The husband and the 18 year old son even started crying. The husband took me into a bear hug and kissed my forehead. The horse has an awesome place to live. This is her resting place. She will die there. She has huge green fields, a 50 sq ft stall thats bedded deeply with straw, other critters and horses to keep her company and a family that's already in love with her. I couldn't be happier for her.

 

I'm sad though because she was a gift from my momma when my granny passed 3 years ago... It just sucks, but I found her a really good home and everyone is ok. The girls miss her, but we can always go see her. She lives close by.

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So, my momma had surgery on Thursday.

 

 

What a f***ing day... I couldn't sleep at all. Eric was moody, and I was hormonal and a wreck. I woke up to the barn owner sending me a 7 text text that was explaining how she's sick and damn tired of me blaming my financial issues on her (WTF?! I never once said that at all! I never said anything negative about her!!! Stupid barn gossips!) and gave me until the 1st to get the horse out, blah blah blah... So, then I get ready to leave for the hospital, my stomach is in knots.

 

I get to the hospital, and I was late getting there because of traffic and taking a wrong turn in my distress... I get there, and I saw my moms boyfriend, and I just broke down. I didn't get to see her before she went into surgery. He said the dr told him it would take 3.5 hours.

 

2 hours into it, the pager went off. I freaked the f**k out because I just knew something went wrong. We waited in the consult room for the dr. and he came in to say that the surgery went smoother than expected and we will know in 3-5 weeks if further treatment or no treatment is needed.

 

30 mins later we were in the recovery room with her. Her color was great, she was sitting up and had her cantankerous look on her face, which told me she would be fine. She was up and walking in the time it took me to walk to the restroom and back and got herself dressed and was heading home.

 

Her lips are bruised in two places from the breathing apparatus and her throat is sore. She's still sore and didn't have to have a colostomy bag at all.

 

Two hours later, the horse sold to a lady that has been super stressful since the horse went lame again while she was trying her out (she only has stone bruises in her feet, nothing more serious than that) and she ended up buying her. The horse was delievered yesterday.

 

The last week has been hell on wheels. One of the worst weeks I've ever had, actually. I got promised weekends off for my family, and then it was taken away a day later. Eric was under a ton of stress and was taking it out on me, and all of this made me feel like vomiting for the last few days. I'm down to a lower weight again (which is great!) but I was finally able to eat last night.

 

So, everything is good. Eric is good, I'm good. The girls are good. My momma is really good for now! Horse is happy and good.

 

When I said goodbye to her yesterday, I walked up to her, she raised her head out of the grass she was eating that she wouldn't raise her head for anybody for... I wrapped my arms around her head, she leaned into me with a really soft look in her eye. Her ears relaxed and we just stood there. Stock still. I started crying. The horse was tearing up. She knew. She was sad, you could feel it and see it. The husband and the 18 year old son even started crying. The husband took me into a bear hug and kissed my forehead. The horse has an awesome place to live. This is her resting place. She will die there. She has huge green fields, a 50 sq ft stall thats bedded deeply with straw, other critters and horses to keep her company and a family that's already in love with her. I couldn't be happier for her.

 

I'm sad though because she was a gift from my momma when my granny passed 3 years ago... It just sucks, but I found her a really good home and everyone is ok. The girls miss her, but we can always go see her. She lives close by.

 

Though I'm very happy that everything seems to be going well for you, from your family to your mom's health, the moment I got to the bit about you hugging the horse and her tearing up, that was it - I got tears in my eyes. :hug2:

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So, my momma had surgery on Thursday.

 

 

What a f***ing day... I couldn't sleep at all. Eric was moody, and I was hormonal and a wreck. I woke up to the barn owner sending me a 7 text text that was explaining how she's sick and damn tired of me blaming my financial issues on her (WTF?! I never once said that at all! I never said anything negative about her!!! Stupid barn gossips!) and gave me until the 1st to get the horse out, blah blah blah... So, then I get ready to leave for the hospital, my stomach is in knots.

 

I get to the hospital, and I was late getting there because of traffic and taking a wrong turn in my distress... I get there, and I saw my moms boyfriend, and I just broke down. I didn't get to see her before she went into surgery. He said the dr told him it would take 3.5 hours.

 

2 hours into it, the pager went off. I freaked the f**k out because I just knew something went wrong. We waited in the consult room for the dr. and he came in to say that the surgery went smoother than expected and we will know in 3-5 weeks if further treatment or no treatment is needed.

 

30 mins later we were in the recovery room with her. Her color was great, she was sitting up and had her cantankerous look on her face, which told me she would be fine. She was up and walking in the time it took me to walk to the restroom and back and got herself dressed and was heading home.

 

Her lips are bruised in two places from the breathing apparatus and her throat is sore. She's still sore and didn't have to have a colostomy bag at all.

 

Two hours later, the horse sold to a lady that has been super stressful since the horse went lame again while she was trying her out (she only has stone bruises in her feet, nothing more serious than that) and she ended up buying her. The horse was delievered yesterday.

 

The last week has been hell on wheels. One of the worst weeks I've ever had, actually. I got promised weekends off for my family, and then it was taken away a day later. Eric was under a ton of stress and was taking it out on me, and all of this made me feel like vomiting for the last few days. I'm down to a lower weight again (which is great!) but I was finally able to eat last night.

 

So, everything is good. Eric is good, I'm good. The girls are good. My momma is really good for now! Horse is happy and good.

 

When I said goodbye to her yesterday, I walked up to her, she raised her head out of the grass she was eating that she wouldn't raise her head for anybody for... I wrapped my arms around her head, she leaned into me with a really soft look in her eye. Her ears relaxed and we just stood there. Stock still. I started crying. The horse was tearing up. She knew. She was sad, you could feel it and see it. The husband and the 18 year old son even started crying. The husband took me into a bear hug and kissed my forehead. The horse has an awesome place to live. This is her resting place. She will die there. She has huge green fields, a 50 sq ft stall thats bedded deeply with straw, other critters and horses to keep her company and a family that's already in love with her. I couldn't be happier for her.

 

I'm sad though because she was a gift from my momma when my granny passed 3 years ago... It just sucks, but I found her a really good home and everyone is ok. The girls miss her, but we can always go see her. She lives close by.

 

Your post made me tear up too. Like Babycat said, I'm happy that all is well in your life, but the part about your horse ..... I hope you go visit her from time to time. Animals understand more than most human beings give them credit for.

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