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And Now for Something Completely Different...Monty Python Thread v.2


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It could be carried by an African swallow!

Notice that they do not so much fly as...plummet.

Oh, bugger... :bang bang: Right in the wing.

Slaughtering a few of God's creatures - that was the life. Charging about the moorland, blasting their heads off. :wub:

And so the Midianites went forth to Ram Gilead in Kadesh Bilgemath by Shor Ethra Regalion, to the house of Gash-Bil-Betheul-Bazda, he who brought the butter dish to Balshazar and the tent peg to the house of Rashomon, and there slew they the goats, yea, and placed they the bits in little pots. Here endeth the lesson.

You're just trying to cash in on the BBC's exciting Icelandic saga. :moon:

The only trouble is, you gave me the idea before I'd given you the pound. And that's not good business.

Just because I have an idea, it doesn't mean it's great. It could be lousy. :P

Er... exactly. What is it?

Well, it's a sort of impression of what a kind of Renaissance courtier artist might have looked like at the court of one of the great families like the Medicis or the Borgias... :gumby:

Well I think Utrillo's brushwork is fantastic... But he doesn't always agree with me ... Not after a Rubens, anyway ... all those cherries ... ooohh ... Urgh! I've got Vermeer all down my shirt...

When some homicidal maniac comes after you with a bunch of loganberries, don't come crying to me! :codger:

Hmmmmm. Thinks - this sounds like a job for... Bicycle Repair Man...but how to change without revealing my secret identity? http://www.planetsmilies.com/smilies/confused/confused0006.gif

You go left at artificial limbs and hearing aids, right at dentures and it's on your left just by glass eyes. :blah:

At 10.30 every morning, Ken arrives at what he thinks is the gym. Sometimes it's a sweetshop, sometimes it's a private house. Today its a hospital.

Get on parade! Come on! We haven't got all day, have we? Come on :bitchslap: come on :bitchslap: come on. :bitchslap:

Well, to be quite honest, Sarge, I'd... rather be at home with the wife and kids.

I won't say I'm glad to see ya, but boy, am I glad to see ya. :hug2:

If they can't see you, they can't get you

You haven't given us time to hide. :(

And it's beginning to look like another gold for Britain. :atickhum:
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:

Simon's over and Vivian's over beautifully, oh and the jump of a lifetime - if only his father could understand

...No, don't understand that banter at all. :huh:
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:

Simon's over and Vivian's over beautifully, oh and the jump of a lifetime - if only his father could understand

...No, don't understand that banter at all. :huh:

Like you say, sir. We'll be able to make time, eventually without to lose, sir, no. :ph34r:
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:

Simon's over and Vivian's over beautifully, oh and the jump of a lifetime - if only his father could understand

...No, don't understand that banter at all. :huh:

Like you say, sir. We'll be able to make time, eventually without to lose, sir, no. :ph34r:

Have you always said things in a very roundabout way?
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:

Simon's over and Vivian's over beautifully, oh and the jump of a lifetime - if only his father could understand

...No, don't understand that banter at all. :huh:

Like you say, sir. We'll be able to make time, eventually without to lose, sir, no. :ph34r:

Have you always said things in a very roundabout way?

I...er...I...er...I...er...I...I can't think of anything to say about it. :blink:
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:

Simon's over and Vivian's over beautifully, oh and the jump of a lifetime - if only his father could understand

...No, don't understand that banter at all. :huh:

Like you say, sir. We'll be able to make time, eventually without to lose, sir, no. :ph34r:

Have you always said things in a very roundabout way?

I...er...I...er...I...er...I...I can't think of anything to say about it. :blink:

Good evening! Uhh, would you care for something to... talk about?
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:

Simon's over and Vivian's over beautifully, oh and the jump of a lifetime - if only his father could understand

...No, don't understand that banter at all. :huh:

Like you say, sir. We'll be able to make time, eventually without to lose, sir, no. :ph34r:

Have you always said things in a very roundabout way?

I...er...I...er...I...er...I...I can't think of anything to say about it. :blink:

Good evening! Uhh, would you care for something to... talk about?

Now I did ask for tea. :eyeroll: That was just my announcement, just a metaphor.
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:

Simon's over and Vivian's over beautifully, oh and the jump of a lifetime - if only his father could understand

...No, don't understand that banter at all. :huh:

Like you say, sir. We'll be able to make time, eventually without to lose, sir, no. :ph34r:

Have you always said things in a very roundabout way?

I...er...I...er...I...er...I...I can't think of anything to say about it. :blink:

Good evening! Uhh, would you care for something to... talk about?

Now I did ask for tea. :eyeroll: That was just my announcement, just a metaphor.

He knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes and satire.
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:

Simon's over and Vivian's over beautifully, oh and the jump of a lifetime - if only his father could understand

...No, don't understand that banter at all. :huh:

Like you say, sir. We'll be able to make time, eventually without to lose, sir, no. :ph34r:

Have you always said things in a very roundabout way?

I...er...I...er...I...er...I...I can't think of anything to say about it. :blink:

Good evening! Uhh, would you care for something to... talk about?

Now I did ask for tea. :eyeroll: That was just my announcement, just a metaphor.

He knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes and satire.

So much for pathos. :eh:
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:

Simon's over and Vivian's over beautifully, oh and the jump of a lifetime - if only his father could understand

...No, don't understand that banter at all. :huh:

Like you say, sir. We'll be able to make time, eventually without to lose, sir, no. :ph34r:

Have you always said things in a very roundabout way?

I...er...I...er...I...er...I...I can't think of anything to say about it. :blink:

Good evening! Uhh, would you care for something to... talk about?

Now I did ask for tea. :eyeroll: That was just my announcement, just a metaphor.

He knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes and satire.

So much for pathos. :eh:

No, no, not a pun, no. What's the other thing which reads the same backwards as forwards?
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:

Simon's over and Vivian's over beautifully, oh and the jump of a lifetime - if only his father could understand

...No, don't understand that banter at all. :huh:

Like you say, sir. We'll be able to make time, eventually without to lose, sir, no. :ph34r:

Have you always said things in a very roundabout way?

I...er...I...er...I...er...I...I can't think of anything to say about it. :blink:

Good evening! Uhh, would you care for something to... talk about?

Now I did ask for tea. :eyeroll: That was just my announcement, just a metaphor.

He knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes and satire.

So much for pathos. :eh:

No, no, not a pun, no. What's the other thing which reads the same backwards as forwards?

If you're going to split hairs, I'm going to piss off.
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:

Simon's over and Vivian's over beautifully, oh and the jump of a lifetime - if only his father could understand

...No, don't understand that banter at all. :huh:

Like you say, sir. We'll be able to make time, eventually without to lose, sir, no. :ph34r:

Have you always said things in a very roundabout way?

I...er...I...er...I...er...I...I can't think of anything to say about it. :blink:

Good evening! Uhh, would you care for something to... talk about?

Now I did ask for tea. :eyeroll: That was just my announcement, just a metaphor.

He knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes and satire.

So much for pathos. :eh:

No, no, not a pun, no. What's the other thing which reads the same backwards as forwards?

If you're going to split hairs, I'm going to piss off.

Well, get on with it, admitted seventy-eight-year-old genial jurisprude Maltraves. :codger:
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:

Simon's over and Vivian's over beautifully, oh and the jump of a lifetime - if only his father could understand

...No, don't understand that banter at all. :huh:

Like you say, sir. We'll be able to make time, eventually without to lose, sir, no. :ph34r:

Have you always said things in a very roundabout way?

I...er...I...er...I...er...I...I can't think of anything to say about it. :blink:

Good evening! Uhh, would you care for something to... talk about?

Now I did ask for tea. :eyeroll: That was just my announcement, just a metaphor.

He knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes and satire.

So much for pathos. :eh:

No, no, not a pun, no. What's the other thing which reads the same backwards as forwards?

If you're going to split hairs, I'm going to piss off.

Well, get on with it, admitted seventy-eight-year-old genial jurisprude Maltraves. :codger:

M'lud, and my other lud, the prosecution will endeavour to show m'lud, that m'lud - ah, not you m'lud, that m'lud, m'lud, while passing sentence at the Central Criminal Court blotted his copy book. Call exhibit Q.
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:

Simon's over and Vivian's over beautifully, oh and the jump of a lifetime - if only his father could understand

...No, don't understand that banter at all. :huh:

Like you say, sir. We'll be able to make time, eventually without to lose, sir, no. :ph34r:

Have you always said things in a very roundabout way?

I...er...I...er...I...er...I...I can't think of anything to say about it. :blink:

Good evening! Uhh, would you care for something to... talk about?

Now I did ask for tea. :eyeroll: That was just my announcement, just a metaphor.

He knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes and satire.

So much for pathos. :eh:

No, no, not a pun, no. What's the other thing which reads the same backwards as forwards?

If you're going to split hairs, I'm going to piss off.

Well, get on with it, admitted seventy-eight-year-old genial jurisprude Maltraves. :codger:

M'lud, and my other lud, the prosecution will endeavour to show m'lud, that m'lud - ah, not you m'lud, that m'lud, m'lud, while passing sentence at the Central Criminal Court blotted his copy book. Call exhibit Q.

A small patch of brown liquid, which could be creosote or some extract used in industrial varnishing. :hi:
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:

Simon's over and Vivian's over beautifully, oh and the jump of a lifetime - if only his father could understand

...No, don't understand that banter at all. :huh:

Like you say, sir. We'll be able to make time, eventually without to lose, sir, no. :ph34r:

Have you always said things in a very roundabout way?

I...er...I...er...I...er...I...I can't think of anything to say about it. :blink:

Good evening! Uhh, would you care for something to... talk about?

Now I did ask for tea. :eyeroll: That was just my announcement, just a metaphor.

He knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes and satire.

So much for pathos. :eh:

No, no, not a pun, no. What's the other thing which reads the same backwards as forwards?

If you're going to split hairs, I'm going to piss off.

Well, get on with it, admitted seventy-eight-year-old genial jurisprude Maltraves. :codger:

M'lud, and my other lud, the prosecution will endeavour to show m'lud, that m'lud - ah, not you m'lud, that m'lud, m'lud, while passing sentence at the Central Criminal Court blotted his copy book. Call exhibit Q.

A small patch of brown liquid, which could be creosote or some extract used in industrial varnishing. :hi:

Blimey. Whatever did I give the wife? :o
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:

Simon's over and Vivian's over beautifully, oh and the jump of a lifetime - if only his father could understand

...No, don't understand that banter at all. :huh:

Like you say, sir. We'll be able to make time, eventually without to lose, sir, no. :ph34r:

Have you always said things in a very roundabout way?

I...er...I...er...I...er...I...I can't think of anything to say about it. :blink:

Good evening! Uhh, would you care for something to... talk about?

Now I did ask for tea. :eyeroll: That was just my announcement, just a metaphor.

He knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes and satire.

So much for pathos. :eh:

No, no, not a pun, no. What's the other thing which reads the same backwards as forwards?

If you're going to split hairs, I'm going to piss off.

Well, get on with it, admitted seventy-eight-year-old genial jurisprude Maltraves. :codger:

M'lud, and my other lud, the prosecution will endeavour to show m'lud, that m'lud - ah, not you m'lud, that m'lud, m'lud, while passing sentence at the Central Criminal Court blotted his copy book. Call exhibit Q.

A small patch of brown liquid, which could be creosote or some extract used in industrial varnishing. :hi:

Blimey. Whatever did I give the wife? :o

"Doug, Bob and Gordon visit the Ark Royal." :doh:
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:

Simon's over and Vivian's over beautifully, oh and the jump of a lifetime - if only his father could understand

...No, don't understand that banter at all. :huh:

Like you say, sir. We'll be able to make time, eventually without to lose, sir, no. :ph34r:

Have you always said things in a very roundabout way?

I...er...I...er...I...er...I...I can't think of anything to say about it. :blink:

Good evening! Uhh, would you care for something to... talk about?

Now I did ask for tea. :eyeroll: That was just my announcement, just a metaphor.

He knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes and satire.

So much for pathos. :eh:

No, no, not a pun, no. What's the other thing which reads the same backwards as forwards?

If you're going to split hairs, I'm going to piss off.

Well, get on with it, admitted seventy-eight-year-old genial jurisprude Maltraves. :codger:

M'lud, and my other lud, the prosecution will endeavour to show m'lud, that m'lud - ah, not you m'lud, that m'lud, m'lud, while passing sentence at the Central Criminal Court blotted his copy book. Call exhibit Q.

A small patch of brown liquid, which could be creosote or some extract used in industrial varnishing. :hi:

Blimey. Whatever did I give the wife? :o

"Doug, Bob and Gordon visit the Ark Royal." :doh:

Well, things turned out all right in the end, but you musn't ask how 'cos it's naughty.
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:

Simon's over and Vivian's over beautifully, oh and the jump of a lifetime - if only his father could understand

...No, don't understand that banter at all. :huh:

Like you say, sir. We'll be able to make time, eventually without to lose, sir, no. :ph34r:

Have you always said things in a very roundabout way?

I...er...I...er...I...er...I...I can't think of anything to say about it. :blink:

Good evening! Uhh, would you care for something to... talk about?

Now I did ask for tea. :eyeroll: That was just my announcement, just a metaphor.

He knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes and satire.

So much for pathos. :eh:

No, no, not a pun, no. What's the other thing which reads the same backwards as forwards?

If you're going to split hairs, I'm going to piss off.

Well, get on with it, admitted seventy-eight-year-old genial jurisprude Maltraves. :codger:

M'lud, and my other lud, the prosecution will endeavour to show m'lud, that m'lud - ah, not you m'lud, that m'lud, m'lud, while passing sentence at the Central Criminal Court blotted his copy book. Call exhibit Q.

A small patch of brown liquid, which could be creosote or some extract used in industrial varnishing. :hi:

Blimey. Whatever did I give the wife? :o

"Doug, Bob and Gordon visit the Ark Royal." :doh:

Well, things turned out all right in the end, but you musn't ask how 'cos it's naughty.

Disgusting! Right! I'd like to conclude this arrest with a hymn... :syrinx: :guitar: :NP:
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like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964

It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. :yes:

Simon's over and Vivian's over beautifully, oh and the jump of a lifetime - if only his father could understand

...No, don't understand that banter at all. :huh:

Like you say, sir. We'll be able to make time, eventually without to lose, sir, no. :ph34r:

Have you always said things in a very roundabout way?

I...er...I...er...I...er...I...I can't think of anything to say about it. :blink:

Good evening! Uhh, would you care for something to... talk about?

Now I did ask for tea. :eyeroll: That was just my announcement, just a metaphor.

He knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes and satire.

So much for pathos. :eh:

No, no, not a pun, no. What's the other thing which reads the same backwards as forwards?

If you're going to split hairs, I'm going to piss off.

Well, get on with it, admitted seventy-eight-year-old genial jurisprude Maltraves. :codger:

M'lud, and my other lud, the prosecution will endeavour to show m'lud, that m'lud - ah, not you m'lud, that m'lud, m'lud, while passing sentence at the Central Criminal Court blotted his copy book. Call exhibit Q.

A small patch of brown liquid, which could be creosote or some extract used in industrial varnishing. :hi:

Blimey. Whatever did I give the wife? :o

"Doug, Bob and Gordon visit the Ark Royal." :doh:

Well, things turned out all right in the end, but you musn't ask how 'cos it's naughty.

Disgusting! Right! I'd like to conclude this arrest with a hymn... :syrinx: :guitar: :NP:

http://www.planetsmilies.com/smilies/innocent/innocent0001.gif O Lord,

...ooh, You are so big,

so absolutely huge.

Gosh, we're all really impressed down here, I can tell You.

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Don't forget...I'm six foot five. :atickhum:

Surely the third tallest mayor in Derby's history. :clap:
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