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In-Laws from hell??


yyzena

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I'm starting this topic in hopes that writing about my in-laws and hearing how others deal with their in-laws, will help me cope better with them. I will keep my story short & sweet.

 

wacko.gif THESE PEOPLE ARE DRIVING ME F***ING NUTS!!! wacko.gif

 

Mother in Law : Incredibly high maintenance, overbearing and bossy, insists that we call her/see her daily. If this does not occur, guilt trip ensues. Impossible to please, no matter how much money is spent at Christmas or birthdays, always a comment or two about what she didn't get or what someone else got. Disregard of others feelings ... tactless, sometimes downright hurtful remarks made to others (I feel she singles out just me on this one!), but if the same tone/or remarks were made to her, she would be shattered, and EVERYONE would know about it. Meddles in our business (i.e. complains about our decision not to have children)

 

Father in law : One word: Rage-A-Holic. Never in my life have I seen one person with so much anger in him, mostly over nothing. This man does not talk, he YELLS, constantly. Hates the world, and everyone in it, and proceeds to remind everyone around him that he feels this way. They say people mellow as they get older, but not my father in law. It almost seems that he's getting worse. And God forbid you even disagree with something he says. I won't even get into that.

 

Please everyone, don't take this the wrong way. I know there are no perfect people, and eveyone has problems. I've mentioned in previous posts that I've suffered with an anxiety disorder for most of my life. I recognize that problem, and have gone to counseling for it. I do love my in laws because they are my family, and I would do anything for them. The frustrating part is that they are in complete denial that anything is wrong with them. I would love to just go up to my father in law one day and ask him why he yells so much, and why he hates the world, but I'm afraid that it would get nasty. My husband says to just turn a deaf ear to them, but that's really hard when they're a part of your everyday life.

 

Anyone have any advice, or want to share their stories? PLEASE SHARE YOUR STORIES, TELL ME I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE GOING THROUGH THIS!!!

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i have been fortunate to have great in laws in my life...

 

but it's the immediate family (step family, rather) that i have had enough with in my life...

 

i made the decision to just not be apart of their lives anymore.... if they want me, or my kids...THEY have to make the first move...

i'm done...

the hurt has gone on long enough...

they say blood is thicker than water, well, i don't feel as tho if a "family" member makes you feel like sh*t...

then buh bye...

they aren't blood related, but had been in my life for over 15 years

i'm sorry... life is too damn short to have that kind of negative energy in it...

get out of my castle...

if it can be agreed upon by you and your husband... man just walk away.....

i know, easier said than done, but IMO, i don't care if they are family or not, they hurt me...pass judgement.....disrespect me or my kids in any way shape or form....... nope, sorry... i don't have to deal with it and i'm not going to.....

i know, not much good adivice, and it's in laws...so you have to respect your husband and how he feels about his family... but i tell ya.... i didn't give my husband the chance... if he wants those people in his life, then by all menas... go and have fun.. leave me out of it.....

yeah...it'll hurt for a while...it's been 3 years since i've seen any family....(my cousins...my step family) it still hurts some days... but you know what? f**k 'em... they are people... and regardless....they deserve respect....YOU deserve respect... it is really worth your physical health to have to deal with the grief???

i say not... your husband needs to understand & respect that as well.....

 

 

 

 

whew!!

well.. good luck...

i'm here for more sound welcome advice anytime!!

..........

or not........ wink.gif

 

 

the best thing you can do is vent about it... seek advice... learn thru this

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QUOTE (yyzena @ Jul 5 2005, 04:40 PM)
I'm starting this topic in hopes that writing about my in-laws and hearing how others deal with their in-laws, will help me cope better with them. I will keep my story short & sweet.

wacko.gif THESE PEOPLE ARE DRIVING ME F***ING NUTS!!! wacko.gif

Mother in Law : Incredibly high maintenance, overbearing and bossy, insists that we call her/see her daily. If this does not occur, guilt trip ensues. Impossible to please, no matter how much money is spent at Christmas or birthdays, always a comment or two about what she didn't get or what someone else got. Disregard of others feelings ... tactless, sometimes downright hurtful remarks made to others (I feel she singles out just me on this one!), but if the same tone/or remarks were made to her, she would be shattered, and EVERYONE would know about it. Meddles in our business (i.e. complains about our decision not to have children)

Father in law : One word: Rage-A-Holic. Never in my life have I seen one person with so much anger in him, mostly over nothing. This man does not talk, he YELLS, constantly. Hates the world, and everyone in it, and proceeds to remind everyone around him that he feels this way. They say people mellow as they get older, but not my father in law. It almost seems that he's getting worse. And God forbid you even disagree with something he says. I won't even get into that.

Please everyone, don't take this the wrong way. I know there are no perfect people, and eveyone has problems. I've mentioned in previous posts that I've suffered with an anxiety disorder for most of my life. I recognize that problem, and have gone to counseling for it. I do love my in laws because they are my family, and I would do anything for them. The frustrating part is that they are in complete denial that anything is wrong with them. I would love to just go up to my father in law one day and ask him why he yells so much, and why he hates the world, but I'm afraid that it would get nasty. My husband says to just turn a deaf ear to them, but that's really hard when they're a part of your everyday life.

Anyone have any advice, or want to share their stories? PLEASE SHARE YOUR STORIES, TELL ME I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE GOING THROUGH THIS!!!

Your father-in-law sounds like my EX husband unsure.gif

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Thanks for letting me vent, ladyrushfan80. rose.gif

 

I can relate to everything you've said, and I commend you for standing up for yourself. It takes alot of courage to stick to what you believe.

 

You are right, life is short, and I truly try not to let people get to me. Most times they don't, I laugh and let it roll off my back.

 

However, I've discovered that spending too much time with disturbed people = loss of brain cells fing.gif .

 

My real family too, has its problems (myself included!). Good thing with them is that everyone minds their own business, which makes life so much easier.

 

Thanks again for your support ... Rock On Sister!! 2.gif

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CanHEdian -

 

EX you said? Smart girl, you are. wink.gif

 

May I ask if you still keep in touch with your ex? Is he still like that, or has he gotten any better?

 

It's too bad that people are that angry & mean all the time. It can't be much of a life.

 

I've always wanted to get help for any problems I've had, wether it be from a couselor, or just reading a book that could help or inspire me. Some people are so damn stubborn though, and they think that getting help = being weak. So they stay miserable. It's a shame!

 

Fortunately for me, my husband is nothing like his dad .... he is so mellow, nothing ever gets to him! He's good at listening to me, even when I complain about his parents, he's supportive. I know not everyone has that, and I should be thankful (I really am! heart.gif )

 

 

My heart goes out to those who do not have a supportive or caring partner ... that is worse than any in-law problems I could even have. To them, I say ... Hold your head up high ... we're always here for you.

 

So many wonderful people on this forum, truly a great family.

 

Thanks for listening rose.gif

 

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QUOTE (CanEHdian @ Jul 5 2005, 08:09 PM)
QUOTE (yyzena @ Jul 5 2005, 04:40 PM)
I'm starting this topic in hopes that writing about my in-laws and hearing how others deal with their in-laws, will help me cope better with them. I will keep my story short & sweet.

wacko.gif THESE PEOPLE ARE DRIVING ME F***ING NUTS!!! wacko.gif

Mother in Law : Incredibly high maintenance, overbearing and bossy, insists that we call her/see her daily. If this does not occur, guilt trip ensues. Impossible to please, no matter how much money is spent at Christmas or birthdays, always a comment or two about what she didn't get or what someone else got. Disregard of others feelings ... tactless, sometimes downright hurtful remarks made to others (I feel she singles out just me on this one!), but if the same tone/or remarks were made to her, she would be shattered, and EVERYONE would know about it. Meddles in our business (i.e. complains about our decision not to have children)

Father in law : One word: Rage-A-Holic. Never in my life have I seen one person with so much anger in him, mostly over nothing. This man does not talk, he YELLS, constantly. Hates the world, and everyone in it, and proceeds to remind everyone around him that he feels this way. They say people mellow as they get older, but not my father in law. It almost seems that he's getting worse. And God forbid you even disagree with something he says. I won't even get into that.

Please everyone, don't take this the wrong way. I know there are no perfect people, and eveyone has problems. I've mentioned in previous posts that I've suffered with an anxiety disorder for most of my life. I recognize that problem, and have gone to counseling for it. I do love my in laws because they are my family, and I would do anything for them. The frustrating part is that they are in complete denial that anything is wrong with them. I would love to just go up to my father in law one day and ask him why he yells so much, and why he hates the world, but I'm afraid that it would get nasty. My husband says to just turn a deaf ear to them, but that's really hard when they're a part of your everyday life.

Anyone have any advice, or want to share their stories? PLEASE SHARE YOUR STORIES, TELL ME I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE GOING THROUGH THIS!!!

Your father-in-law sounds like my EX husband unsure.gif

Her father-in-law sounds like my CURRENT husband! Double scared.gif

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I have no contact with my in-laws. They've never seen my youngest son, and they live 30 minutes away from us. Long, bitter story, but...at least I don't have in-law problems. cool.gif
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I'm also lucky to have in-laws with whom I have a very good relationship. Sometimes I think it mayhave somethuing to with the fact I share my father-in-law's tastes in music to some degree and the fact that I'm closer in age to my mother-in-law than my wife.
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QUOTE (GhostGirl @ Jul 6 2005, 10:50 AM)
I have no contact with my in-laws. They've never seen my youngest son, and they live 30 minutes away from us. Long, bitter story, but...at least I don't have in-law problems. cool.gif

Same here GG! wink.gif

I have no contact with them for 18 years now, my husband has no contact anymore since 15 years..

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QUOTE (sullysue @ Jul 6 2005, 09:20 AM)
Her father-in-law sounds like my CURRENT husband! Double  scared.gif

God bless you and give you strength, my friend. rose.gif

 

 

 

QUOTE (GhostGirl @ Jul 6 2005, 10:50 AM )

  I have no contact with my in-laws. They've never seen my youngest son, and they live 30 minutes away from us. Long, bitter story, but...at least I don't have in-law problems.

I'm sorry for the bitterness of the situation, GG. From your posts, I can tell that you are a bright and level-headed person. It's THEIR loss .... rose.gif

 

 

 

 

QUOTE (barney_rebel @ Jul 6 2005, 10:55 AM)

  I love my in-laws.... I worry about my own parents sometimes more than them :| 

That's great that you're close with your inlaws, it really does make life easier when there isn't all that tension. But, I can relate to the 'worrying' part, too. rose.gif

 

 

 

QUOTE (sundog @ Jul 6 2005, 11:10 AM )

  My EX in laws love me!!!!

I still refer to them as 'mom' and 'dad'


I think it burns the new wifes a**!

(they like me WAY more than her!!!!) 

Similar situation here, when my father remarried, my grandmother (dad's mom) still referred to my mom as her 'daughter', and not my dad's new wife. I loved this because my stepmother was nothing but a gold digging tramp. God, pretty soon I'll want to start a "STEP PARENTS FROM HELL' thread ....!!

 

 

 

 

Question to self: Where did all this bitterness come from all in a sudden?

 

Answer: See "PMS' thread !!! (Just kidding!!)

 

Thanks for responding everyone! trink39.gif

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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QUOTE (Rolinda Bonz @ Jul 7 2005, 11:32 PM)
We are islands to each other
Building hopeful bridges
On a troubled sea
Some are burned or swept away
Some we would not choose
But we're not always free


2.gif

goodpost.gif

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