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#241 Cygnus 2112

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Posted 05 September 2013 - 08:24 PM

Donuts, is there anything they can't do?

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#242 Lost In Xanadu

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Posted 06 September 2013 - 10:58 AM

View Postbillybobjoe1881, on 05 September 2013 - 08:24 PM, said:

Donuts, is there anything they can't do?
To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems

#243 The Analog Grownup

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Posted 06 September 2013 - 07:36 PM

Posted Image

#244 CygnusGal

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Posted 29 October 2013 - 04:51 AM

Bumping the thread for Edna. :rose: :(

#245 Lost In Xanadu

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Posted 29 October 2013 - 11:12 AM

Mrs. Krabappel: Your grades have gotten steadily worse since the beginning of the term. Are you aware of that?
Bart: Yes, ma'am.
Mrs. Krabappel: And are you aware there is a major exam coming up tomorrow on Colonial America?
Bart: Yes, ma'am.
[as he starts to glaze, all he hears is:]
Mrs. Krabappel: Blah-blah, blah-blah, blah-blah-blah, blah-blah?
Bart: Yes, ma'am.
Mrs. Krabappel: Blah-blah, blah-blah, blah-blah-blah, blah-blah!
Bart: Yes, ma'am.
Mrs. Krabappel: Bart! You haven't been listening to a word I've said, have you?
Bart: Yes, ma'am.
Mrs. Krabappel: Well, then what did I say?
Bart: Uh..."straighten up and fly right?"
Mrs. Krabappel: [spluttering] Well, that was a lucky guess!

#246 CygnusGal

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Posted 30 October 2013 - 09:25 AM

Mrs. Krabappel: (reading) After two months at sea, the Pilgrims were running out of food and water. (Nelson raises his hand) Yes, Nelson.
Nelson: Did they have any have yo-yo's?
Mrs. Krabappel: No, they did not have yo-yo's. (continues reading) When they landed at Plymouth Rock, they were greeted by the friendly Wampanog Indians.
Milhouse: (raises his hand) Did the Indians have yo-yo's?
Mrs. Krabappel: No, they did not have yo-yo's! (slams book closed) That's it! (slams book onto her desk) I am getting sick and tired of talking about yo-yo's. From now on, I will not accept any book reports, science projects, dioramas, or anything else on yo-yo's or yo-yo-related topics. Am I making myself clear?
Bart: Yo!

#247 Lost In Xanadu

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Posted 30 October 2013 - 01:12 PM

Edna: Go away, Bart, this is not a good time.
   Bart: I saw you two fighting...I'm worried there could be a strike
         and the school would shut down.
   Edna: [scoffs] I'm sure you'd really hate that.  There's not going to
         be a strike, Bart.
   Bart: Yeah...Skinner says you wouldn't have the won tons to go
         through with it.
   Edna: Skinner said _that_?
   Bart: Well, I had to clean it up a little.
          [in Skinner's office]
         Basically, Krabappel said you'd give the teachers everything
         they want.
Skinner: She did?
   Bart: Yeah.  She said you'd fold faster than Superman on laundry day.
Skinner: We'll see about that.  Simpson, I always thought you were...
         sneaky and manipulative.  Now I see you're really a very
         sensitive little boy.

#248 KennyLee

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Posted 30 October 2013 - 01:28 PM

Climbing a tree to break into a museum

Homer:  OK Lisa, we're almost there.

Lisa: Dad, I'm kinda scared.

Homer: GOOD! You're gonna need that adrenaline to make the final jump!

#249 KennyLee

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Posted 30 October 2013 - 01:35 PM

Homer: Mr. Burns, you're the richest guy I know.

Burns: Yes, but I'd give it all up for a little more.

#250 invisible airwave

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Posted 30 October 2013 - 09:04 PM

View PostKennyLee, on 30 October 2013 - 01:28 PM, said:

Climbing a tree to break into a museum

Homer:  OK Lisa, we're almost there.

Lisa: Dad, I'm kinda scared.

Homer: GOOD! You're gonna need that adrenaline to make the final jump!

Stupid risks are what make life worth living! - Homer

#251 CygnusGal

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Posted 31 October 2013 - 04:48 AM

Lovejoy: We are gathered together today to join Seymour and Edna in holy matrimony. Does anyone present know any reason why these two should not be wed?
Edna: I do!
Lovejoy: No, you say that part later.

#252 KennyLee

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Posted 31 October 2013 - 08:07 AM

Carl:  Oh, I concur. That is to say I agree.

All look at him surpised.

Carl: Word of the day calendar. Holds up entry for conquer.

Posted Image

Edited by KennyLee, 31 October 2013 - 09:28 AM.


#253 Lost In Xanadu

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Posted 31 October 2013 - 09:28 AM

Happy Halloween!



Homer: So what do you think, Marge?  All I need is a title.  I was
       thinking along the lines of "No TV and No Beer Make Homer"
       something something.
Marge: "Go Crazy"?
Homer: Don't mind if I do!

#254 KennyLee

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Posted 31 October 2013 - 09:30 AM

Marge finds out that Bart found Homer's gun in the refrigerator:

Marge: Homer! I thought I told you to get rid of that gun?

Homer: Marge you have to believe me. I never thought you'd find out!

#255 CygnusGal

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Posted 02 November 2013 - 06:54 AM

View PostKennyLee, on 31 October 2013 - 08:07 AM, said:

Carl:  Oh, I concur. That is to say I agree.

All look at him surpised.

Carl: Word of the day calendar. Holds up entry for conquer.

Posted Image
:lol: One of the greatest lines ever! Bravo! :ebert:

Edna: Would you like to get some coffee?
Comic Book Guy: And a family bucket of chicken!

#256 Victoria's Ladder

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Posted 06 November 2013 - 11:28 PM

with a rag on a stick..

https://www.youtube....h?v=jSJQEl5vcAo

#257 KennyLee

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Posted 12 November 2013 - 03:56 PM

(Homer throws an empty soda can on the sidewalk)

BART:  Homer, why did you just litter?

HOMER:  Cause its easier... duh!

#258 Lost In Xanadu

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Posted 24 January 2014 - 04:12 PM

Shut up, brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-tip!

#259 condemned2bfree

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Posted 10 February 2014 - 04:16 PM

Bart 'wow,gods so in your face'
Homer 'yeah, he's my favourite fictional character'

#260 Lost In Xanadu

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Posted 11 February 2014 - 10:06 AM

Homer: God, if you really are God, you'll get me tickets to that game.
        [doorbell rings]
  Ned: Heidely-ho, neighbor.  Wanna go to the game with me?  I got two
       tick --
Homer: [slams the door] Why do you mock me, O Lord?
Marge: Homer, that's not God.  That's just a waffle that Bart tossed up
       there.
        [Marge scrapes it off into Homer's hands]
Homer: I know I shouldn't eat thee, but -- [bites] Mmm, sacrilicious.




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