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How did you know? Your path to marriage...


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#81 Babycat

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Posted 03 April 2013 - 10:45 AM

View PostChicken hawk, on 02 April 2013 - 09:44 AM, said:

     How do you know when you’re really in love?

You don’t have to hold your farts in anymore. Posted Image

:LMAO:

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#82 Tombstone Mountain

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Posted 04 April 2013 - 02:47 PM

View Postrushgoober, on 03 April 2013 - 08:36 AM, said:

View PostJohnnyBlaze, on 29 March 2013 - 12:41 AM, said:

I'm not sure about all the "I just knew" answers. There must be something deeper to it. If I had gotten married when "I just knew" I would've been married twice already and (very likely) divorced both those times too.

dude, all i can say is this.  i had heard the old "when you find the right one you'll know" thing for years and years, and i was always hopeful, but skeptical.  and then it happened to me.  14 years later we're still here! :wub:
She probably deserves an award for that 14 years :D-13: Glad you found Mrs Right Goobs!

#83 JohnnyBlaze

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Posted 04 April 2013 - 10:26 PM

View Postrushgoober, on 03 April 2013 - 08:36 AM, said:

View PostJohnnyBlaze, on 29 March 2013 - 12:41 AM, said:

I'm not sure about all the "I just knew" answers. There must be something deeper to it. If I had gotten married when "I just knew" I would've been married twice already and (very likely) divorced both those times too.

dude, all i can say is this.  i had heard the old "when you find the right one you'll know" thing for years and years, and i was always hopeful, but skeptical.  and then it happened to me.  14 years later we're still here! :wub:
14 years is greatness. Even a shorter time can be greatness. I've never been that hopeful or even skeptical. I guess the answer itself ("I just knew") is where I have my doubt. I think we've all made some choices where we thought we were 100% sure to have them fail or fade for whatever reason. And then there are the friends I know who "just knew" but then their marriages failed for various reasons. Is that phrase just a stock answer for some? Probably. Hell, I'd (pessimistically) go so far to say that it's a stock phrase for most. I think answers like "I'm not sure why but it just made sense", "We wanted to start raising a family", "We had been together for years", etc. seem to make more sense to me.

#84 USB Connector

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Posted 05 April 2013 - 02:05 PM

View PostBabycat, on 03 April 2013 - 10:44 AM, said:

View PostUSB Connector, on 03 April 2013 - 10:07 AM, said:

We haven't been together as long as others in this thread, nor are we married yet due to current circumstances. We've been together for seven years. When we're  together, other things just don't seem as bad. Just being near her makes me feel at ease. We have totally different interests, yet we find joy in partaking in those interests despite our previous dislike for them. This may sound like infatuation but this is something that has not changed since we've met.

I can't imagine being without her, nor do I want to imagine being with anyone else. I'm sure that's been said a dozen times over but I can't think of any other way to put it. I honestly can't wait until we can finally get married. I know she feels the same. Had circumstances been different we would be already. I don't know how else to put it.

Aw!  :hug2:  :wub:

Thanks babycat :hug2:

Re-reading the post I see all the repetitions and poor grammar from changing thoughts mid sentence. I can't think about how much I love with without all of it pretty much coming out at once. She really is amazing.

#85 mstmompj

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Posted 05 April 2013 - 09:43 PM

View PostJohnnyBlaze, on 04 April 2013 - 10:26 PM, said:

14 years is greatness. Even a shorter time can be greatness. I've never been that hopeful or even skeptical. I guess the answer itself ("I just knew") is where I have my doubt. I think we've all made some choices where we thought we were 100% sure to have them fail or fade for whatever reason. And then there are the friends I know who "just knew" but then their marriages failed for various reasons. Is that phrase just a stock answer for some? Probably. Hell, I'd (pessimistically) go so far to say that it's a stock phrase for most. I think answers like "I'm not sure why but it just made sense", "We wanted to start raising a family", "We had been together for years", etc. seem to make more sense to me.

While I "knew" within 3 months of starting my relationship with my husband that I would marry him and we'll be celebrating our 24th wedding anniversary this summer, as a certain song goes, "some days were dark" as well.  There have been times when I honestly had to ask myself the old newspaper advice column question, "are you better off with him or without him?"  However, it's making it through those rougher times, as well as the shared joys and sorrows, that have forged a closer bond over time.  At this point in time our marriage, though not perfect, is quite happy.  It's not so much greatness as it is work and commitment.

On the other hand, when I was 18 and a freshman in college, I rushed into a "starter marriage" with my high school boyfriend mostly because I wanted to get out of my parents' house and live on my own.  (Yes, I now see the contradiction there.)  I remember one time before the wedding on the bus to university thinking about the fact that I didn't see myself staying married to him.  So I "just knew" that I didn't really love him and shouldn't get married.  Yet I was still stupid enough (and perhaps also selfish enough) to go through with it.  We were ill-suited for one another and it was a relief two years into the marriage when he decided to join the Air Force.  We divorced when I was 21—no kids, thankfully—and it was for the best that we went our separate ways.

So I would venture to say that if you meet Miss Right, you may "know" too, and if there's too much skepticism, it's probably best not to take the plunge.  But even when you do "know," that's not the end; it's just the beginning.

#86 ILSnwdog

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Posted 05 April 2013 - 11:13 PM

View PostTombstone Mountain, on 09 March 2013 - 01:53 PM, said:

View PostXanadoood, on 09 March 2013 - 12:57 AM, said:

I'd like to say there is a formula, but really, there isn't. I know some couples who have been together since high school, still going strong , and others who wasted all of thier twenties with the wrong person ( I would be a good example of this) . I've had better relationships in my 30s and into my 40s. I would say MOST marriages in your early to mid 20s don't last, but again, it's all a crapshoot.
I waited to my 30's to get married...very glad I did!
Me too.

#87 JohnnyBlaze

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Posted 06 April 2013 - 03:36 AM

View Postmstmompj, on 05 April 2013 - 09:43 PM, said:

View PostJohnnyBlaze, on 04 April 2013 - 10:26 PM, said:

14 years is greatness. Even a shorter time can be greatness. I've never been that hopeful or even skeptical. I guess the answer itself ("I just knew") is where I have my doubt. I think we've all made some choices where we thought we were 100% sure to have them fail or fade for whatever reason. And then there are the friends I know who "just knew" but then their marriages failed for various reasons. Is that phrase just a stock answer for some? Probably. Hell, I'd (pessimistically) go so far to say that it's a stock phrase for most. I think answers like "I'm not sure why but it just made sense", "We wanted to start raising a family", "We had been together for years", etc. seem to make more sense to me.

While I "knew" within 3 months of starting my relationship with my husband that I would marry him and we'll be celebrating our 24th wedding anniversary this summer, as a certain song goes, "some days were dark" as well.  There have been times when I honestly had to ask myself the old newspaper advice column question, "are you better off with him or without him?"  However, it's making it through those rougher times, as well as the shared joys and sorrows, that have forged a closer bond over time.  At this point in time our marriage, though not perfect, is quite happy.  It's not so much greatness as it is work and commitment.

On the other hand, when I was 18 and a freshman in college, I rushed into a "starter marriage" with my high school boyfriend mostly because I wanted to get out of my parents' house and live on my own.  (Yes, I now see the contradiction there.)  I remember one time before the wedding on the bus to university thinking about the fact that I didn't see myself staying married to him.  So I "just knew" that I didn't really love him and shouldn't get married.  Yet I was still stupid enough (and perhaps also selfish enough) to go through with it.  We were ill-suited for one another and it was a relief two years into the marriage when he decided to join the Air Force.  We divorced when I was 21—no kids, thankfully—and it was for the best that we went our separate ways.

So I would venture to say that if you meet Miss Right, you may "know" too, and if there's too much skepticism, it's probably best not to take the plunge.  But even when you do "know," that's not the end; it's just the beginning.
You've shared a lot. Thanks for that :)

#88 hobo73

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Posted 11 April 2013 - 10:28 PM

I was hellbent on never marrying- then I met the man I couldn't simply let get away <3
Love him so damn much. we may argue, but he is my best friend and I am deeply content.

#89 hobo73

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Posted 11 April 2013 - 10:29 PM

^ that just made him tear up hehe

#90 ILSnwdog

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Posted 12 April 2013 - 01:41 PM

View Posthobo73, on 11 April 2013 - 10:28 PM, said:

I was hellbent on never marrying- then I met the man I couldn't simply let get away <3
Love him so damn much. we may argue, but he is my best friend and I am deeply content.
When I met my wife, she said that she was never getting married, and she never wanted kids.

Six months after we started dating, she told me "you know...if you ask me to marry you, I'll say yes.  I'm a sure thing".  :)

We also have three kids.  Amazing how you life changes when you meet the right person. ;)

#91 Tombstone Mountain

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Posted 12 April 2013 - 04:15 PM

View PostILSnwdog, on 12 April 2013 - 01:41 PM, said:

View Posthobo73, on 11 April 2013 - 10:28 PM, said:

I was hellbent on never marrying- then I met the man I couldn't simply let get away <3
Love him so damn much. we may argue, but he is my best friend and I am deeply content.
When I met my wife, she said that she was never getting married, and she never wanted kids.

Six months after we started dating, she told me "you know...if you ask me to marry you, I'll say yes.  I'm a sure thing".  :)

We also have three kids.  Amazing how you life changes when you meet the right person. ;)
I agree dude...when the kids come into the relationship you find joys that are straight outta heaven. the challenges are many but with the right person they can be met and navigated pretty dang well.




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