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New Pitch for Survivor Series


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#1 what went wrong?

what went wrong?

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Posted 14 March 2007 - 10:59 PM

THE NEXT SURVIVOR SERIES
>
>
> Six married men will be dropped on an island with one car and 3
> kids each for six weeks.
>
> Each kid will play two sports and either take music or dance classes.
>
> There is no fast food.
>
> Each man must take care of his 3 kids; keep his assigned house
> clean, correct all homework, complete science projects, cook, do laundry,
> and pay a list of "pretend" bills with not enough money.
>
> In addition, each man will have to budget in money for groceries
> each week.
>
> Each man must remember the birthdays of all their friends and
> relatives, and send cards out on time.
>
> Each man must also take each child to a doctor's appointment, a
> dentist appointment and a haircut appointment . He must make one
> unscheduled and inconvenient visit per child to the Urgent Care
> (weekend, evening, on a holi day or right when they're about to leave for
> vacation).
> He must also make cookies or cupcakes for a social function.
>
> Each man will be responsible for decorating his own assigned house, planting
> flowers outside and keeping it presentable at all times.
>
> The men will only have access to television when the kids are
> asleep and all chores are done.
> There is only one TV between them, and a remote with dead batteries.
>
> Each father will be required to know all of the words to every stupid song
> that comes on TV and the name of each and every character on cartoons.
>
> The men must shave their legs, wear makeup daily, which they will
> apply to themselves either while driving or making three lunches.
>
> Each man will have to make an Indian hut model with six toothpicks, a
> tortilla! and one marker; and get a 4 year old to eat a serving of peas.
>
> Each man must adorn himself with jewelry, wear uncomfortable yet
> stylish shoes, keep their nails polished and eyebrows groomed.
>
> The men must try to get through each day without snot, spit-up or barf on
> their clothing.
>
> During one of the six weeks, the men will have to endure severe abdominal
> cramps, back aches, and have extreme, unexplained mood swings but
> never once complain or slow down from other duties. They must try to explain
> what a tampon is for when the 6-yr old boy finds it in the purse.
>
> They must attend weekly school meetings, church, and find time at
> least once to spend the afternoon at the park or a similar setting.
>
> He will need to read a book and then pray with the children each
> night without falling asleep, and then feed them, dress them, brush their
> teeth and comb their hair each morning by 7:00. They must leave the home
> with
> no food on their face or clothes.
>
> A test will be given at the end of the six weeks, and each father
> will be required to know all of the following information: each
> child's birthday, height, weight, shoe size, clothes size and doctor's
> name. Also the child's weight at birth, length, time of birth, and length
> <BR>of labor, each child's favorite color, middle name, favorite snack,
> favorite song, favorite drink, favorite toy, biggest fear and what
> they want to be when they grow up.
>
> They must clean up after their sick children at 2:00 a.m. and then
> spend the remainder of the day tending to that child and waiting on them
> hand and
> foot until they are better.
>
> They must have a loving, age appropriate reply to, "You're not the boss of
> me".
>
> The kids vote them off the island based on performance.
> The last man wins on ly if...he still has enough energy to be
> intimate with his spouse! at a moment's notice.
>
> If the last man does win, he can play the game over and over and
> over again or the next 18-25 years...eventually earning the right to be
> called Mother.


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#2 owlswing

owlswing

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Posted 15 March 2007 - 07:51 AM

  rofl3.gif  rofl3.gif  rofl3.gif  rofl3.gif  

#3 blonde77th

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Posted 15 March 2007 - 09:11 AM

Good 1  laugh.gif  z7shysterical.gif  joker.gif  

#4 RockTheCradle

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Posted 17 March 2007 - 10:19 PM

Also, they should have to locate clothing items belonging not to children, but to adults who ought to be keeping up with their own stuff. And keep up with every bit of laundry generated by the household.

#5 skyswing

skyswing

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Posted 17 March 2007 - 10:30 PM

Safe response:  wub.gif Thank you for taking care of the laundry. Yes, I need to put what's mine away and I'll do that soon.
And, I apologize for leaving my shirt on the kitchen table.
Hi ladies!  


#6 Rolinda Bonz

Rolinda Bonz

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Posted 18 March 2007 - 10:40 PM

user posted image

#7 blue rush

blue rush

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Posted 23 March 2007 - 06:57 PM

  applaudit.gif i would love every minute of it...don't forget giving one kid their medicine for a week then again next week when the other one gets sick




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