Barney's Alter Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 The Female of the Species by: Rudyard Kipling When the Himalayan peasant meets the he-bear in his pride, He shouts to scare the monster who will often turn aside. But the she-bear thus accosted rends the peasant tooth and nail, For the female of the species is more deadly than the male. When Nag, the wayside cobra, hears the careless foot of man, He will sometimes wriggle sideways and avoid it if he can, But his mate makes no such motion where she camps beside the trail - For the female of the species is more deadly than the male. When the early Jesuit fathers preached to Hurons and Choctaws, They prayed to be delivered from the vengeance of the squaws - 'Twas the women, not the warriors, turned those stark enthusiasts pale - For the female of the species is more deadly than the male. Man's timid heart is bursting with the things he must not say, For the Woman that God gave him isn't his to give away; But when hunter meets with husband, each confirms the others tale - The female of the species is more deadly than the male. Man, a bear in most relations, worm and savage otherwise, Man propounds negotiations, Man accepts the compromise; Very rarely will he squarely push the logic of a fact To its ultimate conclusion in unmitigated act. Fear, or foolishness, impels him, ere he lay the wicked low, To concede some form of trial even to his fiercest foe. Mirth obscene diverts his anger; Doubt and Pity oft perplex Him in dealing with an issue - to the scandal of the Sex! But the Woman that God gave him, every fibre of her frame Proves her launched for one sole issue, armed and engined for the same, And to serve that single issue, lest the generations fail, The female of the species must be deadlier than the male. She who faces Death by torture for each life beneath her breast May not deal in doubt or pity - must not swerve for fact or jest. These be purely male diversions - not in these her honor dwells - She, the Other Law we live by, is that Law and nothing else! She can bring no more to living than the powers that make her great As the Mother of the Infant and the Mistress of the Mate; And when Babe and Man are lacking and she strides unclaimed to claim Her right as femme (and baron), her equipment is the same. She is wedded to convictions - in default of grosser ties; Her contentions are her children, Heaven help him, who denies! He will meet no cool discussion, but the instant, white-hot wild Wakened female of the species warring as for spouse and child. Unprovoked and awful charges - even so the she-bear fights; Speech that drips, corrodes and poisons - even so the cobra bites; Scientific vivisection of one nerve till it is raw, And the victim writhes with anguish - like the Jesuit with the squaw! So it comes that Man, the coward, when he gathers to confer With his fellow-braves in council, dare not leave a place for her Where, at war with Life and Conscience, he uplifts his erring hands To some God of abstract justice - which no woman understands. And Man knows it! Knows, moreover, that the Woman that God gave him Must command but may not govern; shall enthrall but not enslave him. And She knows, because She warns him and Her instincts never fail, That the female of Her species is more deadly than the male! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alsgalpal Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daylin Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 QUOTE (Alsgalpal @ Nov 9 2005, 01:05 PM) I agree AGP! Great poem! Thanks Barney's Alter for sharing this Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladirushfan80 Posted November 9, 2005 Share Posted November 9, 2005 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cygnus Posted November 10, 2005 Share Posted November 10, 2005 Ahhh Women... ( unknown author ) Everyday I give thanks to the Goddess I have two mounds upon my bodice I shave my legs, I sit down to pee I can justify any shopping spree Not to a barber, but a beauty salon Can get a massage without a hard on Can balance the checkbook, pump my own gas Can talk to my friends about the size of my ass I always save money by using coupons Can admit to others when I am wrong Don't drive in circles at any cost So I don't have to admit when I am lost Don't act like I'm in a timed marathon Every time I go to the john Let me tell you men Listen to me boys Those things in your pants That you treat as toys You love them more then we ever will We would rather suck on a cold pickled dill I spend two hours preparing for a date Only to find you're two hours late I don't watch movies with lots of gore Don't need instant replay to remember the score I won't lose my hair I don't get jock itch And just cause I'm assertive Don't call me a bitch I don't wear the same underwear everyday The food in my fridge has no sign of decay I don't go to Sears To look at the tools I don't cheat at poker I follow the rules I don't smoke cigars Don't pay for drinks at bars I don't punch my friends just to say "Hi" And it's O.K. for me to cry I know all you men Think that you're "IT" But compared to a woman You just ain't shit! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blonde77th Posted March 31, 2006 Share Posted March 31, 2006 all i can say is AMEN Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chaotica Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 woohoo amen sister Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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