toymaker Posted November 28, 2016 Share Posted November 28, 2016 (edited) Janet Lynn McLellan, 1969-2016 http://i173.photobucket.com/albums/w47/msspielm1/Janet%20in%20Rush%20shirt_zpsfqkhtzjv.jpg Some time has passed but I am still devastated by this loss. She was perfect to me in every way. Some of Janet's favorite Rush songs: Tears, The Garden, Bravado, Losing It, Limelight, The Analog Kid, Closer to the Heart, Working Man, Cinderella Man, Xanadu, The Spirit of Radio, Entre Nous, Different Strings, Distant Early Warning, Roll the Bones, The Wreckers (most of Clockwork Angels), Driven, Half the World . . . Huge Geddy fan. When I took Janet to see Rush, I think I watched the band half the time and watched her face the other half. This will always be one great memory among countless others. After she got sick, we were able to get out to see a Rush tribute band. "Geddy Lee" dedicated The Garden to her, and sat beside her with his arm around her during the last part of the encore. She loved that. I don't know how I am going to get through this - if any of you believe in positive energy, please send it my way. Please listen to The Garden in Janet's honor. And Janet, if you're there, give me a sign. And if you can't do that, please know you were - and are - the love of my life, and I was crazy about you every second we were together. http://i173.photobucket.com/albums/w47/msspielm1/Janet%20collage_zpssvgmd1vh.jpg Edited November 28, 2016 by toymaker 19 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Permanent-Rush Posted November 28, 2016 Share Posted November 28, 2016 (edited) Sorry for your loss, I hope u are okay. Edited November 28, 2016 by GotNeilPeart? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Not Posted November 28, 2016 Share Posted November 28, 2016 Reading that was saddening. If you've mentioned this loss before, I missed it, and I'm sorry to learn of it now.I hope you get through things okay... Seems like you can expect it to take a while though. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Principled Man Posted November 28, 2016 Share Posted November 28, 2016 I don't know how I am going to get through this....... One day at a time, my good man. Patience, resilience, and determination. You can do it! :ebert: 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bean-tor Posted November 28, 2016 Share Posted November 28, 2016 toymaker, I am so, so sorry for your loss. What a moving post. I'll be sending positive thoughts and my best wishes your way. for your lovely Janet 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rick N. Backer Posted November 28, 2016 Share Posted November 28, 2016 Most touching thing I've read in a long, long time. Wishing you peace, brother. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pressure/Hopenosis Posted November 28, 2016 Share Posted November 28, 2016 I don't know you and I don't write on this board but I feel the need to reach out and say hang in there. I don't know your pain. But I believe I know your love as the limited things you wrote remind me of my wife and myself. Especially the watching her reaction half the time while at a show. Hang onto those that are positive and keep them around you. Her spirit will be with you, always... Peace Brother... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treeduck Posted November 28, 2016 Share Posted November 28, 2016 Sorry for your loss. :( 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blueschica Posted November 28, 2016 Share Posted November 28, 2016 I'm so sorry for your loss, toymaker. You have my heartfelt condolences, and I will hold you in my thoughts and prayers for positive energy to come your way. Your tribute to your wife is beautiful. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toymaker Posted November 28, 2016 Author Share Posted November 28, 2016 Sorry for your loss, I hope u are okay.Thanks, GNP - trying to keep busy to divert myself. I think TRF might help in that way. It's the moments when it's quiet and there's nothing going on that it tends to come crashing down. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toymaker Posted November 28, 2016 Author Share Posted November 28, 2016 Reading that was saddening. If you've mentioned this loss before, I missed it, and I'm sorry to learn of it now.I hope you get through things okay... Seems like you can expect it to take a while though. Thanks. I haven't really talked about it except to a couple of people on the forum. I think I might have hinted at it on the in/out thread a while back, and it's the reason I haven't really been on too much in the last little while. People have said that I will get over it in time. Right now, that seems impossible. As the days pass, it feels worse and worse. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toymaker Posted November 28, 2016 Author Share Posted November 28, 2016 I don't know how I am going to get through this....... One day at a time, my good man. Patience, resilience, and determination. You can do it! :ebert: Sounds practical...it's just that I feel pretty well gutted. All of those qualities I usually have...but not right now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toymaker Posted November 28, 2016 Author Share Posted November 28, 2016 toymaker, I am so, so sorry for your loss. What a moving post. I'll be sending positive thoughts and my best wishes your way. for your lovely Janet Thanks, bean-tor. She was devastatingly foxy, and I have no idea how I managed the good fortune of spending that time with her. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toymaker Posted November 28, 2016 Author Share Posted November 28, 2016 Most touching thing I've read in a long, long time. Wishing you peace, brother. Thanks RNB. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toymaker Posted November 28, 2016 Author Share Posted November 28, 2016 I don't know you and I don't write on this board but I feel the need to reach out and say hang in there. I don't know your pain. But I believe I know your love as the limited things you wrote remind me of my wife and myself. Especially the watching her reaction half the time while at a show. Hang onto those that are positive and keep them around you. Her spirit will be with you, always... Peace Brother... Thanks, P/N. There are a lot of great memories. Actually, I'm hard pressed to remember any bad times. She could magic away tension just like that... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toymaker Posted November 28, 2016 Author Share Posted November 28, 2016 Sorry for your loss. :( Thank you treeduck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toymaker Posted November 28, 2016 Author Share Posted November 28, 2016 I'm so sorry for your loss, toymaker. You have my heartfelt condolences, and I will hold you in my thoughts and prayers for positive energy to come your way. Your tribute to your wife is beautiful. Thanks blueschica - my reserves of positive energy are definitely at an all-time low, so anything you can spare... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucas Posted November 28, 2016 Share Posted November 28, 2016 oh **** I'm sitting here with tears coming down my face Mark, I am so sorry 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1-0-0-1-0-0-1 Posted November 28, 2016 Share Posted November 28, 2016 Toymaker, if you've mentioned or hinted at this before this thread, I certainly haven't seen it. I'm so sorry for your loss. If this board can give you even the slightest of positive distractions then I'm glad we can be here for you. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RUSHHEAD666 Posted November 28, 2016 Share Posted November 28, 2016 I am so sorry TM.You are a great man Mark.Be strong.My prayers are with you and all of your family. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
geezer Posted November 28, 2016 Share Posted November 28, 2016 No matter we don't know each other, I am sorry indeed for yor loss. Cherish all the great memories of her, it's the best thing to still have her with you 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnnyBlaze Posted November 28, 2016 Share Posted November 28, 2016 As if I didn't already have deep respect for your thoughtful posts which always seem to come from both your heart and mind. I'm sorry for your loss toymaker. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bean-tor Posted November 28, 2016 Share Posted November 28, 2016 toymaker, I am so, so sorry for your loss. What a moving post. I'll be sending positive thoughts and my best wishes your way. for your lovely Janet Thanks, bean-tor. She was devastatingly foxy, and I have no idea how I managed the good fortune of spending that time with her. You're welcome. You know, she also had the good fortune of spending that time with you :) I'm sure she knew that she was a lucky lady, to be so clearly adored. Hang in there. My heart breaks for you but my hope, and I imagine hers too, is that the love you've shared will continue to see you through. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Disembodied Spirit Posted November 28, 2016 Share Posted November 28, 2016 Mark you have family here to lean on.So very sad for your loss and words cannot console you enough.Remember something good about her every single day.I know she can still make you smile and that you will always have.God bless 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EagleMoon Posted November 28, 2016 Share Posted November 28, 2016 I'm so sorry for your loss. She sounds like a beautiful person. Maybe this sounds redundant but try to just be thankful that you had something a lot of us never have experienced and try to remember the good times. Hang in there. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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